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Original poster

To wonder how a school can allow their girls to dress like this?

325 replies

Piggyleroux · 10/10/2011 09:57

I only have 1 ds of 18 mo so am probably very out of touch but here goes.

I picked up dh from his weekend on call at queens hospital in Romford. On the way I was stuck in traffic outside a school and was frankly shocked by how short the girls skirts were. They were actually bum skimming. They also were all wearing over the knee black socks so a vast quantity of thigh was on show.

Am I just an old prude? I felt sad tbh that they felt they had to dress like this probably to fit in. Why doesn't the school impose a below the knee rule?

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 10/10/2011 12:19

Horribel yes, but I was doing that in 1984.

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:21

I agree that girls should not have to change their outfits for the opposite sexm but surely one of the reasons for having a uniform is that it sets the right tone for a learning environment? Even I find it hard not to look at a cleavage on display and I'm a woman in my 30s, not a hormonal teenage boy! Would it be appropriate if other uniforms were disregarded in the same way? Nurses uniforms for example?

WilsonFrickett · 10/10/2011 12:24

scary my DS is only 6 so I don't have any direct experience of that age yet.

But I'm already trying to teach him that he can't pin his mistakes on another pupil's behaviour and that no matter what child X does, we and school expect him to behave in the right way. Of course.

I expect as he grows up he'll see lots of women and girls in varying states of undress who perhaps aren't making the best choices for their safety and I would 100 percent expect him to behave well, rationally and respectfully. FFS.

gramercy · 10/10/2011 12:24

Agree with Riven that give it a few years and the girls'll be dragging massively long skirts behind them in the dirt.

At my school they made a tremendous effort to police heel height. 2cm maximum! And then - disaster for the school - flat shoes (desert boots, to be precise) came in. They couldn't exactly ban flat shoes, nor lace-ups, so there was much hand-wringing until some other fashion came in which had to be cracked down upon.

But I do believe the way some schoolgirls dress at the moment is more than just trying to be a bit rebellious and push the boundaries. And no, they don't look nice, or "sweet" as some poster said. There is a world of difference between the "flippy" short skirts and tights with ballet pumps that some girls wear and the full-on Britney Spears fancy dress costume that others sport.

seeker · 10/10/2011 12:27

grin

RIZZ0 · 10/10/2011 12:27

Gumball, I hear you on that.

However surely the idea of the "sexy schoolgirl" uniform dying out would help with that?

forrestgump · 10/10/2011 12:29

Got to admit parent hood suddenly made me look at myself in horror at my teen years, however I was in private school and uniform was strict. I shudder at the comp kids loose style here, and whether it has been adjusted after leaving the house is irrelevant, I think it shows total lack of respect by the head of the school allowing it. I prefer little girls to be little girls for as long as is possible.

loveglove · 10/10/2011 12:31

"sexy schoolgirl" will never die out as long as we have men, ann summers and freshers weeks.

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:32

Yu sound very smug Wilson. I will be teaching my DS's the same thing. Of course. But when he's 15, could you honestly not expect him to be distracted by a Britney-esque uniform. I am not saying he might do anything untoward, but it might distract him from his learning, which is after all what he is there for. Which is surely one of the reasons why we have school uniforms - for male and female (as I'm not suggesting it only works one way).

NinkyNonker · 10/10/2011 12:33

We used to have to get on our knees and if the skirt didn't touch the floor it was too short and parents were called. Can't see that being allowed now!

RIZZ0 · 10/10/2011 12:33

Ok, but when this "costume" is actually being worn by schoolgirls themselves it isn't right. I mean, we don't have actual nurses going in to work in a "sexy nurse" get up do we?

I have to run but will read the rest of this with interest.

ElaineReese · 10/10/2011 12:37

I don't give a bugger if it distracts a 15 year old boy, that's their look out and not the girls'! What if he can't work because the girls are too pretty, or their hair is too nice?

Slippery slope, IMO.

loveglove · 10/10/2011 12:38

I don't think it's right that school girls dress this way.

I also think it's ok to tell your daughter to lengthen her skirt a little as it'll look much more flattering on her. What's wrong with teaching your daughter to dress according to her figure?

GetOrfMo1Land · 10/10/2011 12:38

i must say that I have never seen mini skirts with long socks - perhaps that fashiopn hasn't reached Gloucester yet Grin

Most girls around here wear a variation of short black skirt/black opaque tights/brogues or ballet shoes.

ElaineReese · 10/10/2011 12:40

We don't have the long socks thing here either, but it sounds as though it's catching on down south!

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:41

So if the boys unbuttoned their shirts down to their waist, then this would be fine for Elaine? you wouldn't expect teenage girls to be distracted by this?

ElaineReese · 10/10/2011 12:42

I don't think anyone should have shirts unbuttoned to the waist, and I would tell any child who did that to do his or her shirt up, because it's inappropriate! I wouldn't say 'you need to do that up or you will distract the boys/girls'.

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:43

And for the boys "it's their look out" - great attitude. No, it's not: it's for the school and other parents to all make sure that it's an appropriate environment for all children to learn in. Talk about boy-bashing! I take it you only have DD's Elaine (as you can guess, I have DS's Smile).

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:45

It doesn't matter whether you actually say that or not - I am not saying that you should. I am just pointing out that it is a factor, even if it is unspoken.

ElaineReese · 10/10/2011 12:46

Yes, I am absolutely all about making it appropriate, and unbuttoned shirts are not that.

I just disagree that it is a girl's responsibility not to distract a boy with her appearance. Unless she is smothering his face with her tits, it's not her look out.

Yes, I have dds, and I would certainly tell them to keep their breasts under wraps at school (or anywhere else, really!), and I do tell the older one to unroll her school skirt on a daily basis.

However, when I tell her this, I tell her because a) I think it looks crap all rolled up and b) I don't want her to be in trouble at school. NOT because I think she should take responsibility for how distracted a boy may or may not get when confronted with the sight of her kneecaps.

ElaineReese · 10/10/2011 12:49

Also if anything I think that saying a 15 year old boy's concentration or otherwise is a factor in thinking about dress codes is girl-bashing! Uniform isn't - or shouldn't be - designed to take into account how boys feel when they look at it.

HerdOfTinyElephants · 10/10/2011 12:50

Bonsoir's DD was wearing tights, though (which I am assuming at 6 are opaque). A short skirt over opaque tights seems absolutely fine to me for a six-year-old and is easy to play in.

But it's also very different from a buttock-skimming skirt and no tights on a teenager. Still, rolling up skirts to make them shorter whenever out of sight of an authority figure has been going on for decades and I can't imagine it's about to stop any time soon.

loveglove · 10/10/2011 12:50

confronted with the sight of her kneecaps

Oh this made me chuckle.

CamperFan · 10/10/2011 12:56

I guess I am not explaining what I mean very well. I don't agree that women should alter any factor of their clothing for a man. I guess I was just getting annoyed with all the comments on here suggesting that it is fine for girls to go to school dressed in a sexual way, which is clearly breaking the rules of the uniform. There was a thread on here ages ago where the OP got completely flamed for allowing her DS to go into school with a Mohican, and then got annoyed that he was suspended (didn't agree with her either,btw), and yet lots of people in here are suggesting that it's fine for girls to break the rules in a different way.

And if I am completely honest, when DS is a teenager, I would find it really annoying if the school allows it's girls to dress this way (and it sounds like they probably will), because no matter what anyone says, it will probably distract him from his work!

CardyMow · 10/10/2011 12:58

I HAVE DS's. I would expect them NOT to blame anyone else for their lack of concentration at school - whether the other girls in the class were dressed like this or not. Personal responsibility. It's a slippery slope from saying that it is distracting for the boys learning to have girls dressing like this, to saying that a woman asked to be raped for wearing a short skirt / low cut top. My DS's will be expected to concentrate on their work even if the teacher is pole dancing in her underwear!

And I also have a 13yo DD -who looks down on the 90% of the girls in her school who DO dress in the belt-for-skirt with over-the-knee socks. Apparently they're all 'slappers'. DD is at her happiest in either jeans outside of school, and M&S non-nylon, non-clingy school trousers at school. Hasn't stopped her from being asked out by boys. (not that she would go out with them - she thinks they smell still - long may it stay that way!). Yes, she curls or straightens her hair, and puts a small sweep of mascara on - but no more than that for school.