To wonder how a school can allow their girls to dress like this?

[Piggyleroux]

I only have 1 ds of 18 mo so am probably very out of touch but here goes.

I picked up dh from his weekend on call at queens hospital in Romford. On the way I was stuck in traffic outside a school and was frankly shocked by how short the girls skirts were. They were actually bum skimming. They also were all wearing over the knee black socks so a vast quantity of thigh was on show.

Am I just an old prude? I felt sad tbh that they felt they had to dress like this probably to fit in. Why doesn't the school impose a below the knee rule?

I am actually that there are posters on here saying that they think it is fine the way-girlsespecially-are dressed for school nowadays.

Yes I rebelled at school-had a very strict uniform policy,no trousers for girls ever for example-rolled my skirt up,smuggled a bit of lipstick on.

I didnt go to school looking like I was audititioning for a job at spearmint rhino though! Girls go caked in make-up,fake tanned so much they make jordan look anemic,hair bleached to within a inch of its life,minging acrylic nails. Its truly vile.

I cant believe parents actually encourage this and before someone comes back to say oh but parents cant control what they wear/look like they-whose paying for the copious amounts of make up,hair dye,micro minis,minging nails?

Twas not so long ago on here that there was a huge outcry over the overt sexuality on programmes like the x factor-so its not ok for rhianna or christina but its ok for my little darling. Yep thats good parenting alright.

Where is anyone encouraging this? I think we are having a reasoned debate about it, calm down.

When I had pink hair at school it was my Mum that did it 0_0 shock horror

To be fair though, she did it at the beginning of the summer holidays and we thought it would have washed out by the time I went back.

I haven't commented on how girls look today, as I don't have a clue. All the girls I see in our area look pretty normal. I can't see any Spearmint Rhino types. Maybe it's only certain areas.

I just don't really see a problem with a bit of uniform rule-bending.

getorf-am perfectly calm thanks-but who rattled your cage? No I didnt see much debate-have seen a lot of posters basically shrugging their shoulders in a well what can you do kinda way- eh be a parent?. Say no. Be the adult and dont bow to the peer pressure. Only my opinion of course.

In a word a bad school if you take the top schools in each area they usually have a good handle on uniform

My dds school send them home at the start of the day if they are not in the correct uniform

And when they come back they have top be brought back by an adult so a member of staff can tell them of to lol

I think its no surprise the behaviour is brilliant the school is in the top 10% of the country and the best school in the area

You can pretty much tell the sink school form the star of the kids skits up to their arse boys wearing black jeans, and trainers and those horrid ny caps with the sticky out peeks

I'll have to disagree about tights and skirts being comfortable Getorf
I can't imagine a less comfortable item of clothing than tights tbh. I don't think I've worn them for 20 years or more, plus they make your feet stink if DD and my MIL are anything to go on.
I don't think that skirts should be banned at school, just optional.

No one is saying it's fine. Some of us are just using it to reminisce a bit and rationalise that actually we havn't turned into rabid Jordanesque types just because we customised our uniforms.

I don't have a daughter but if I did I certainly wouldn't be encouraging that behaviour nor would I be approving of it. I also wouldn't be throwing up my hands in horror and assuming she's shagging the entire first eleven either.

maypole-I agree this used to be the case but dont think it is so much nowadays. As I mentioned I went to a school with a very strict uniform policy/no make up/no jewellry etc. It was also an excellent school in an affluent area.

However I have seen pupils who go to the local "good" school and they look pretty much the same as the ones who go to the crap school. I dont blame the schools as I know they are trying to enforce the uniform and are getting no help from parents who happily send their kids to school in the mini lolita get-up.

maypole - My school is (and was) the top girl's grammar in the area (and one of the best in the country) they were pretty relaxed about uniform. It doesn't necessarily follow it's down to bad schooling. They didn't really like my attire, and they mentioned it form time to time, but I got away with a lot.

Mal I would much rather wear a skirt and tights than a pair of trews. Actually come to think of it I don't ever wear trousers to work.

Perhaps Iam a bit laissez faire about the whole thing having had a dd who doesn't get dolled up for school, so we domn't have school clothing battles (other than 'fgs put a coat on') but I think it's a bit rum the assumption that girls wearing clothes like this are slappers. Like alousieg says, it is a phase that most kids go through, it doesn't necessarily mean they are roguh slappers. I also don't think if you have a daughter who wears a mini skirt + copious amounts of make up to school = a bad parent. that is rather simplistic.

Glos girls grammar in top 20 schools in the country, pretty lax on uniform.

Uniform smartness doesn't necessarily mean anything other than someone in the leadership team and governing body really caring about such things.

My parents certainly weren't bad, but they know how I went to school. I did my make-up on the bus, but didn't take it off before coming home. Their attitude was if I got in trouble I'd have to deal with that. My parents are very relaxed and liberal though.

I most certainly wasn't a slapper anyway. I had my first boyfriend when I was 15 and stayed with him for 8 years. Yeah I ore makeup and had a short skirt, but I was just a sulky little metal-head...not a cheap looking tart.

"I also don't think if you have a daughter who wears a mini skirt + copious amounts of make up to school = a bad parent."

I kind of do, all the girls like that in DD's year are now mothers of at least one child and are the ones who didn't go to college or Uni. I know it's a huge generalisation but it was my experience.

Most of the girls in my school had short skirts and wore lots of make-up and nearly all of them went to Uni (after getting 5 or 6 A levels). It doesn't always follow.

I don't think you can judge someone as a parent just because of how their child looks. There's probably plenty of things from my childhood that would shock people and make them think I have bad parents, but they're amazing and I love them to death. They were just very liberal and trusted us to make our own mistakes and be responsible. Obviously that approach doesn't work for everyone, I understand that, but it DID work for us.

getorf-not nessacarily a bad parent but certainly not a good one imo. Why would any parent want to send their child to school looking like a lapdancer or like they were giving rihanna a run for her money? Geunine question as I am curious....

Of course it doesnt mean that the girls are shagging everything that moves. But its definately making a statment about their sexuality and imo school is neither the time nor the place for that.

My parents didn't want to send me to school looking the way I did. They did however respect the fact that I wanted to look that way so they let me. My Dad used to HATE the way I dressed, but he'd never say it to my face.

I don't think my parents EVER stopped me from wearing what I wanted (clothes make-up etc).

I would say that the girl probably looks relatively normal and the make up gets applied on the bus, perhaps.

I wouldn't say that most responsible parents would allow their child to leave home plastered in make up and with a skirt up to here, and if the teachers don't allow it, I think someone said upthread that a lot of the uniform doctoring goes on before they get to school.

I think though despite the fact you may see what lookl like short skirted slappers I think it is a lot less prevalent than you think, I would say that the vast majority of girls at school (in my experience) just look like normal girls - those who have wacky hair/makeup/short skirts etc are in the minority.

I remember my Mum once telling me about how her Mum forced her to have a perm and wouldn't allow her to wear heels so she used to hide them from her and change when not at home.

She didn't want us to have a deceptive relationship like that so she let me wear what I wanted.

As I said earlier, I know that approach doesn't work for everyone, but it worked for us.

getorf-no sorry but the girls who look "normal" are sadly very much in the minority around here.

You say that the kids maybe put more make-up etc on when they leave home but that doesnt answer the question about who is buying the mini skirts,vats of make-up,acrylic nails,hair extensions etc-surely that is the parents? So therefore it is their responsibility how the kids look when they go out in public?

I just will never understand why any decent parent would want their child to look cheap and nasty? Its mind boggling to me.

I have a 17 year old dn-my sil has been very strict with the way she dresses. She wears a small amount of make up,has never had her hair dyed. Didnt get her ear pierced until she was 14 etc. She has never bowed t the pressure to go along with the crowd and send her dd out looking like jordan. I am not clsoe to my sil but I admire her for that at least!

There are two private schools in our town.

One of them the girls all wear very short skirts and the lads are scruffy. It is known to be lax on rules and its academic performance is slipping. The HT seems not to care.

The other school, is very strict on boys and girls uniform and its academic performance is going up. The HT is very visible.

Both schools draw from the same socio economic group and geographic area. The attitude of the HT to rules and sticking to them is they key difference.

Well I never looked cheap and nasty. I did get a lot of shit because of how I looked though. But it made me strong in my opinion. Clothing/Make-up etc have always been a form of self expression for me (I know that sounds incredibly pretentious but it's not meant to be and I'm not sure how else to put it).

I bought my own clothes and make-up, and I used to customise and make a lot of things myself as well. It's always been important to me not to look "normal" and my parents supported that. I guess that comes from having creative parents (Dad's a retired writer, Mum is also incredibly creative, but not for employment).

I just don't think you can judge based on such things.

Fair point pink about the acrylic nails, make up etc.

Perhaps I am just lucky that dd is a geek and all her friends are geeks . It doesn't seem to be the prevailing style around here, though, and there are some rough schools where I live.

What is a slapper? And how might I identify one?

Just asked ds1 (14) about uniform at his school. Girls are not allowed high heels, they don't roll their skirts up either. They are told when they can remove their jumpers which negates the cleavage experience I suppose.

It's a comp albeit an outstanding comp in a nice area. It's still in Essex though