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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to get a sound proof room so i can escape dd crying

54 replies

AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:03

it's an ongoing problem where dd crys all the time, it is getting to the point that i really don't want to be around her any more as i know from the moment she wakes to the moment she goes to bed it is contant crying.

OP posts:
yellowsubmarine41 · 09/10/2011 09:05

How old is she?

Arachnophobic · 09/10/2011 09:08

I feel your pain Auntie. My DD is a bit like this too. The other day I was so stressed I broke my rule of not using the car to get her to sleep and did just that and drove to the nearest cafe for cake!

How old is your DD?

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:08

2years 4 months

OP posts:
Arachnophobic · 09/10/2011 09:09

Ok, she is no baby then. What does she cry about? Is it just constant tantrums over the small things, or something more than that?

HoneyPablo · 09/10/2011 09:10

Can she tell you why she is crying?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/10/2011 09:10

could she be getting her big molars at the moment, if it seems worse just now? Is the right age for it.

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:14

really have no idea why, she is not really talking yet so can't ask her. ( perhaps she is frustrated at not being able to talk)

it is just really winding me up atm

OP posts:
lollilou · 09/10/2011 09:17

My DS used to do a lot of this before he could talk. Have you tried teaching her some basic sign language?

Arachnophobic · 09/10/2011 09:19

YANBU.

If it's frustration sounds like she may just need a lot of attention for a bit. Books, toys, games, whatever.

Mixed in with TV to give you a break!

Do you have family to help?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/10/2011 09:20

i'd try to get a peek at her back teeth.,..also maybe try some Calpol as it will help if its teeth

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:21

i try to give her alot of attention, but when she is crying all the time it make me want to escape from her.

my family do help out, but when you got a child that crys all the time after 10 minutes they give her back.

i could try my own made up sign language to see if that helps

OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/10/2011 09:22

I'd take her to the GP. Constant crying in a child that age is very distressing and could be a sign that there is something fundamentally wrong.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 09/10/2011 09:27

Now now, op, tell us the truth! It can't be constant crying because you would have taken her to see a doctor by now! I'll bet your dd is like my ds2 was at that age and if so, yes it does feel constant because it happens so often through the day and is so wearing. Hasshe been like that since birth? Because my son was, he aged me by about 5 years in his first year.

I have so much sympathy if you have a natural crier, it is awful, especially when you see other babies and toddlers just smiling and watching contentedly at everything going on around them whilst yours is a screaming red faced ball of rage who seems to think that the world is out to get them.

The good news is that it really does get better as they mature and you can explain situations and reason more with them. Ds is 5 now and will alway wear his heart on his sleeve and see life as one big drama but by god, he is so much easier nownthan when he was you Ds's age. You're right in the thick of it still. I'm willing to bet that when she is around 3 and a half, you will stop and realise one day that she doesn't lose it half as much as she used to. They just seem to mature a lot around that age. Its just how you get through the time before that, isn't it? I clung on to the fact that a member ofnstaff at nursery said that her son was like that at age 2 and now he was 6, he was then most fun to be around and would light up the room when he walked in.

I didn't believe that it would be like that with my son but it is. Like imsay, he's a heart on his sleeve kind of child so everyone knows how he's feeling whatever mood he's in, but his good moods far outweigh his bad ones, and so yes, he really does light up the room when he's in it most of the time now rather than everyone running out of it!

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:31

i suspect it does feel contant, i do get a bit a quiet when she is eating and in bed ( how i love bedtime)

perhaps it is just her personality

OP posts:
tryingtoleave · 09/10/2011 09:40

If she is really crying all the time and she is not speaking at 2.4 then I would be seeing a doctor.

If it is just an exaggeration then, yes, it is frustrating to have a child that cries a lot. My dd sometimes seems to fuss constantly and it is very wearing. Maybe some type of childcare would give you a break?

bonkers20 · 09/10/2011 09:40

I have a 2.5 year old so we are walking in similar shoes. There are days when I do indeed leave him in the lounge, close the bottom stair gate, take myself upstairs and sulk read in my bedroom.

Don't accept that it's her personality - it might just become a self fulfilling prophecy, especially if you start telling other people that's what she's like.

What is she like when you're playing with her, or she's helping you with jobs around the house? What's she like when you're outside playing, or sitting together reading? Does she enjoy telly?

I think a lot of 2 year olds get mighty good at whining at this age and it can get wearying, but I'd be concerned if crying was constant when the child was engaged.

When you say she's not talking, how does she communicate with you? Is her lack of speech being investigated? Some children are late talkers, but no language at this age could indicate a problem. Do you have 2 year checks where you live?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/10/2011 09:44

surely checking her teeth would take a minute..but feel free to ignore my advice

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 09:49

i don't think it is her teeth, but could be wrong. I have looked but can't see any teeth coming through however she has only 9 tteth so i could be the problem

she does talk but very little, things like mamma, dadda not proper talking iygwim. I know when she is thirsty as she will point to the cup cupboard, or she will pat her nappy when wet ect.

OP posts:
HoneyPablo · 09/10/2011 09:51

She is nearly 2 and a half, has only 9 teeth, cries constantly and has only a handful of words but can communicate her needs.
Have you seen a health visitor or speech therapist at all?
Does she go to a nursery, what have they said?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/10/2011 09:52

sorry, didn't mean to be snappy..do forgive me Smile got a sore head.

It's just it's a wee thing but could be causing her a lot of pain, so worth ruling it out.

I know how hard it is when they get frustrated and cry lots, my DD is 5 next week and can't talk.

Incidentally my DD cries all the time when she has sore ears, which she gets often, not raging ear infections but sore red eardrums, so worth taking her to the GP to check that out too.

pigletmania · 09/10/2011 09:53

I hear you Auntie my dd when she was a newborn baby would cry from 9-9pm on off it would drive me potty. She was no better when she was older and the teething came. Then the terrible twos. It transpired though that she had speech and language delay, social communication difficulties and developmental delay and some ASD traits. Not saying that this is you of course, but for me with dd it made a lot of sense now and explained her behaviour.

pigletmania · 09/10/2011 09:55

Why not take her to a speech and language drop in, we had them at the local hospital, your HV will be able to tell you, from there dd was assessed, went on the Hanen Course, and was referred to a Community Paed who have only just dx at 4.5. She is getting a statement, and lots of help from Ed Psych, SALT etc.

Goldenbear · 09/10/2011 10:01

Do you do stuff with her? Is she bored - crying for attention because feels frustrated. At 2 you need to get proactive with their development i.e put your energy and money in to stimulating her not thinking about ways you can avoid her!

Original poster
AuntiePickleBottom · 09/10/2011 10:04

will go and see the HV tomorrow, and also book a dentist appoinment to see if i am missing the signs of her teething.

my son goes to speach thereapy, and is going to the peads ect as he is showing traits of asd and she is so diffrent to him at that age but it may be woth just getting her check to see if it is something that i am missing

OP posts:
tryingtoleave · 09/10/2011 10:05

Op, have you spoken to anyone professional about your dd? Because it seems very odd that you are bothered by her crying but not her development?