to think that people who are thinking of joining a long-established internet forum (say 10 years +) would be well advised to get a feel for the place

[bibbitybobbityhat]

before jumping in and criticising the conventions of the forum hither and thither and then threatening to flounce in a massive hissy fit?

Yes SM, because of the misogyny. Please refer to my previous, i've no interest in raking the whole thing up again.

and do read my counter assertion,youre not recalling it all correctly

What have i missed?

i dnot know who is new unless specifically say im new

oh is this thread about the swearing thread? i agreed with the op then hid the thread, did it go all suzy wong

btw i hate the phrase 'you know where the door is' it always sounds really shitty and rude. and mn doesn't have a door

Yes indeed I am SM.

Will we drop it now?

I agree with chipping, watching a newbie flouncing off over a fucking swear word is what keeps me entertained on a friday night!

(that and the )

use your judgement what you post
i will post and respond as i wish,esp if i contest your recollection

Did I mention rules?

No.

Just conventions.

So there is an awful lot of whining about the use of acronyms (dd, ds etc), swearing, lack of textspeak, lack of tickers, lack of a quote facility, any kind of desire to get people to post in a topic vaguely relevant to what they want to ask rather than stick the lot in aibu, for instance.

I am a newb on another forum. I lurked for months and now post within the conventions of the place that I have been sensitive enough to pick up.

No doubt over the years all forums will evolve.

But for newbs to crash around demanding change this this and this - well, its awfully rude to the people who are already there and who make a forum what it is.

I think it is about the swearing one southeastastra.
And I do think it is shit to turn up and say I am new but you are all shit.

But everyone is having far too much fun being all arsey and self righteous to tell any more.

i thought she had a point myself

I like new people as long as they aren't uppity

If they start insisting people agree with whatever damnfool thing they joined specifically to say then I tend to think them a mite tiresome.

Actually paggy, its not about the swearing one. Just a general observation. I don't mind old-timers being fed up with Mumsnet, its when the newbs start complaining that I suddenly get all defensive .

no one owes anyone else deference online,and nor should anyone think they make a place just because they been about for a bit

If new posters had a little look around first they might deduce that (a) they shouldn't be surprised if not everyone agrees with them and that (b) starting their first post in AIBU and enquiring on whether they should demand cash from all their wedding guests might not be the best move. But then we would all have much less amusement...

Thank you for not biting my head off! Not a new Mum - DS is 17, thought I had got this whole parenting lark out the door walking round university accommodation choices with him...but seem to have two little biscuits in the oven. So not a newbie Mum, but a newbie Mumsnetter.

Anyways, think you're all great, SO looking forward to Lynette's promised ability to type/booze/feed!!!

I was a teensy tinsy student when I had DS, would have been grand if the internet, and you, had existed...

Probably Pete Tong too South

See, this thread has made me chuckle already.

Way to go scottishmummy

I love the "controversial don't give a frig ones the best.

I don't think anyone needs to hang back and work out how everyone else does things - it would be a bit dull if everyone followed the same conventions.

However, I do think it is a bit daft to join a forum, decide you don't like it and then post a huge, dramatic condemnation of it. If you like it, stay and enjoy it. If you don't like it, stop posting and find somewhere more suited to your tastes. If you generally like it but there are things that irk you, stick around and try to put your own stamp on it - some people might agree with you and things might change.

But no point shouting "I can't believe this place - you all need to change every aspect of your posting behaviour for my benefit or I will FLOUNCE" because you are inevitably going to get "don't get the door hit you on your way out" type responses.

I had a big flounce once and I told my Mum and everyfink because this bigger girl called me 'vile' and I cried and my Mum told me to hit her so I tried but I couldn't remember the old caaah's name.

So I name changed and came back 'cos I am brave like that.

[But I was being a total fecking prick on that thread and deserved it]

I'm not really talking about deference scottishmummy. Just general good manners. Or perhaps you think they are not necessary online?

Yes, deeply strange to join a forum, not like it, and then post about why it's shit. I have joined forums before that have annoyed me, but I have just, er, stopped posting in them rather than telling all the posters who presumably do like it that they're wrong and it's rubbish. Odd approach to take.

you are requesting adherence ti posting style you deem acceptable. and presumably some deference to what you regards as established norms

thing is your hoped for mn norms arent necessarily everyone else preferred posting style

You have no idea how much I love and admire you sm.

Me too Love. No one is going to start weeping and wailing if a newbie departs, are they?

It'd be the online equivalent of going on a disastrous first date, he details all your flaws as the reason there will be no second date, you'd hardly cling to his departing legs wailing 'I'll change, I'll change for yooouuuuu'
Nonsense.