to want to be a SAHM because my mother wasn't?

[Animol]

just been reading all the here and there banter about SAHMs and WOHM and missed reading experiences of people's own childhoods.
Try to cut it short: My mother went back to work when I was 10 or 11 and I know I haven't got nearly the same sort of relationship with her as my elder siblings do. During my teenage years she was so caught up in her job and the stress of it that she wasn't really there for me at all. It's made me determined to do it differently for my kids even though I don't find it easy to be a SAHM - I love being a Mum but the housework bit drives me bonkers :)
What did your Mums do? Are you doing the same?

The figures show that men progress in their careers far more than women do. There is no glass ceiling for men.

That is in the main either because they're childless, or because they have wives who take care of all the boring domestic stuff and childcare that they can't be bothered with. Even where that wife works full or part time.

Just because a few individual women manage to progress to the same extent that their partners do, that doesn't mean that the statistical evidence we have, is invalid.

It is valuable to have someone at home who thinks about, plans and either executes or delegates all the tasks one party doesn't feel it's his responsibility to think about. We know that married men do better than single men, we know that fathers earn more than non-fathers. This is even where we account for age, knowing that fathers are likely to be older and therefore slightly more progressed in their careers than non-fathers. Even factoring that in, fathers are higher earners. This is because they have a SAH partner and that is economically valuable to them.

Being a martyr is neither here nor there, that's just a random insult. Women don't become SAHMs in order to progress the careers of their DH's, that is a side effect, not a cause.

Thanks for all (or rather most :) ) of the input everybody - I've been out most of the day so only just read it all.

I realise I will never know what it would have been like if my mum hadn't worked. She was a teacher, left the house before we got up and spent the evenings marking books in front of the telly. My dad was around but he was pretty busy as he got us all of to school- went to work made the tea and then collapsed in front of the telly with my Mum. She worked a bit part time before I was 11 but don't really remember the details. When I look back I just feel like she wasn't there and we never had Mother daughter chats about anything: makeup or boyfriends or periods or just anything. I hear about other WOHM mums who come home and can't wait to see their kids - well My mum wasn't like that but perhaps it would have been the same if she'd been at home - I'll never know.

I'm happy being a SAHM and I'm going to carry on but I can't deny the fact that some of that is to do with my own childhood

ThereBe, where is the evidence that links the disproportionate progression of women in the workplace with the absence of a non-working partner at home to take care of all the domestic stuff? Do you have stats, or is this just your own assumption?

I know exactly what you mean. My mother started her own business when I was 7. She worked 8 to 7pm 5 days a week and most weekends too. We needed the money and I'm grateful for her determination and hard work but I have chosen to be a SAHM. She was never there for me