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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think my neighbourhood is taking liberties...

15 replies

Angel786 · 21/09/2011 14:32

Generally our neighbourhood is not v friendly (I put it down to a London thing). we say hi / bye but don't socialise. Neighbour asked me to water plants while away which I did. He said thx, but if that was me I'd give a small box of chocs / wine.

He's now arranging his deliveries while he's at work and telling courier to buzz me. I live in a block so have to leave baby here, go downstairs and out to collect his stuff.

AIBU to be a bit pissed off?

OP posts:

bumpybecky · 21/09/2011 14:34

you don't have to go downstairs and collect his things, you're allowed to say 'no' you know :)

gegs73 · 21/09/2011 14:34

Bit cheeky but it wouldn't bother me. You need to get a few things going he can help you out with. If he recipricates think its fine.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 21/09/2011 14:35

YANBU. Tell him to get his parcels delivered to his office like every one else does.

ViviPru · 21/09/2011 14:36

YANBU

I work from home and where I used to live, I was the only person in the street in the day so my hallway became like a sorting office. I didn't mind though as all the neighbours were friendly and grateful, and I don't think they actually instructed the couriers to knock on my door specifically.

If you're sure he's actually TOLD the courier to buzz you, then that's a bit of a liberty and if it is inconvenient for you, you shouldn't have to comply.

When your buzzer goes, is it possible to ascertain who is calling before actually answering? If so, and it is the courier, I'd either ignore it or tell the courier you're unable to take delivery at this time.

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 21/09/2011 14:37

Can the courier not come up after they buzz? Tell them the baby is sleeping!

CaymansBound · 21/09/2011 14:38

Just refuse to take delivery. And then you don't have to be pissed off.

If it was a one off and he had asked then you wouldn't feel pissed off but not when someone is treating your like a delivery depot. What does he say when he picks them up from yours?

Original poster

Angel786 · 21/09/2011 14:42

He says thanks when he collects. He asked DH if I'd be in and DH said prob not but he still arranged it.

I did say to the courier I'd be 5 mins as changing DDs nappy but he waited. The building design is awful as people can't get in even if you buzz as multiple locked doors.

I'll just have to think of things to ask neighbour to do, or politely decline in future.

vivi you're far more patient than I!

OP posts:

kelly2000 · 21/09/2011 14:43

If it is a pin for ypu and it is happening all the time, just tell the courier you cannot leave your flat. he either comes up the stairs or organizes a redelivery, or tell him you have not ordered anything and are not going tp collect for anyone else.

ViviPru · 21/09/2011 14:54

heheh, I'm no angel. I confess to having checked the sold prices on ebay for the set of premium golf clubs I'd signed for on behalf of the flash git young man 3 doors down. Stopped short of actually listing them though....

AKMD · 21/09/2011 15:03

Vivi!

YANBU. You are not obliged to take a delivery and actually telling a company to buzz you without even checking taht it's ok first is awful. He deserves to have his parcels taken back to a delivery depot at least 30 miles away... I had a few weeks before Christmas last year where my neighbour was always taking in parcels for and I was so embarrassed. I did say to her not to worry, let them take it back to the depot and I can collect it, but she kept taking them in. I always take any deliveries for her if I'm home though and stopped DH noseying around a massive plasma TV that was delivered once!

When I lived in a flat, the buzzer was the most annoying thing ever. People would buzz and buzz and buzz or just keep it pressed down until I answered, like they would make me come faster by annoying me. When we moved into our current house one of the first things we did was take the doorbell off and get a new door with a knocker :o

Original poster

Angel786 · 21/09/2011 15:36

Tell me about it AKMD I used to tell the couriers not to buzz more than once as they woke DD would always wake DD when she was just a few months old. Even contemplated getting a sticker for the buzzer downstairs

I like Vivi's style, I would so do the same thing!

A life in suburbia beckons!

OP posts:

jendot · 21/09/2011 15:56

I take parcels in for others all the time and regularly ask neighbours to do the same for me. We swap veggies from gardens...If I make a dessert I make extra and take it to the oldies next door. We water plants/ feed animals /watch kids/ borrow sugar/onions etc etc etc
Surely this is a nice neighbourly way to behave...(yes I agree at times it is a little inconvenient) the neighbour hood you live in is how you make it...(ps I live in London too..) when we moved here we made a point of having a barbie and inviting everyone over and offering favors etc etc

Life is FAR to short to begrudge taking parcels in and watering plants for someone surely......

TandB · 21/09/2011 16:11

The place where I used to live in London was a bit odd - mainly grass and trees with a few fairly spread-out houses. The postman (who was lovely) used to go to extreme lengths to get parcels left with someone so I was constantly apologising to complete strangers who lived several hundred yards away about the multiple parcels they had taken delivery of over time.

There was also some non-consecutive numbering so it used to take me bloody ages to find the right place. I was glad when he came up with the brilliant idea of forging my signature and chucking stuff up onto the balcony if it obviously wasn't breakable.

Original poster

Angel786 · 21/09/2011 17:24

Jen we have more of a friendly relationship with neighbours on the other side, I make extra food for them take their parcels etc but they reciprocate. This dude - we met him and his ex for a drink (we paid they never invited us bavk) watered the plants, take parcels but not much appreciation...

Kingfu love that idea, we have a balc and are on the 1st floor so that might work!

OP posts:

DeWe · 21/09/2011 17:37

I'd not want something for doing watering for next door. If I'd had to walk a way, and feed the car, water the plants etc. then I might expect something. It's very much look after each other in the few houses round here.
I take in parcels for several houses and I wouldn't have any problem with them saying "her at no. 4 will take it if I'm out" unless they expected me to stay in for it. Even then as a one off or special present, I probably wouldn't be too worried.

Though I once delivered a parcel to someone I didn't know a few doors away and he was very grateful, the postman had put our address wrong, and he was going spare trying to find it as it was quite a valuable parcel.

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