to write a letter of complaint

[GingerLa]

Im not one for complaining, never have been and to be honest am not even sure If complains are taken seriously at big companies so really is there much point?

Got the bus this morning to meet my sister and take our 2 lo's to playgroup anyway Im sure those of us who use public transport know how difficult it can be travelling by bus with a lo.

The bus driver had been particularly grumpy and rude up to this point but some are so I didnt take much notice until he turned n shouted 'Oi, put your push chair down' I didnt reply immediately as I didnt expect him to speak to me like that. Id already moved into the aisle with my 'quite small' pushchair and was talking with the lady who had been sat near me as we had moved to make room for the wheel chair to manouver in and there was still room for my pushchair.... He shouted again and said will you fold your pushchair down.. my immediate reaction was no, (not out of being selfish or awkward but there were no seats I wouldnt be able to hold my pushchair, toddler ds who was already fed up, bags, coats etc on a bus that had no seats and with a driver who had been going quite fast, n we were still far from where I needed to b)

Anyway with that e looked at me in disgust and turned to the person in the wheelchair n ppl with her and said sorry, I cant let you on, she (nodding at me) wont even put her pushchair down for you to get on!!! he repeated that to the others waiting alongside the person in the wheelchair when they protested. I was still baffeled, as were ppl around me so the next I knew one of the women who had been waiting had got on the bus and walked up to me (still stood in the aisle) and said.. well move then, what am i meant to do with you stood there.. move now!! clearly influenced by the way the driver had spoken about me.....

Now I moved back where I had been and the bus driver drove on an continued being an idiot but he made me feel horrible and even worse made me look this way infront of my ds who understood everything.. I know this may be small fish for some but I do all I can to help ppl n would never ever be so insensitive! Others on the bus were shocked by the drivers actions and the annoying fact is Ive been on buses with a wheelchair and pushchair on them and they fit ok... dependant on type of wheelchair and as I work in a hospice I know the wheelchair that wanted to get on was small enough to fit!

So do I complain or is it not worth it?

YABU and especially so for littering your OP with 'ppl' whilst still managing big long words like pushchair.

People choose to have babies, repeatedly, even!, with all their attendant limitations upon one's lifestyle, because they're nice and make you happy.

How is that comparable to being in a wheelchair?

I'm sick of this victimhood about parenting. While I accept that contraceptive failure, etc occurs (along with conceptions of multiple babies), didn't lots of us here in the UK want children? If it's such unrelenting drudgery, to the point it's comparable to being disabled, then why do people have children even once, never mind more than once?

Answer: because it fecking isn't! They smile, they love you, you watch them grow up. They fulfil a deep need you had to nurture a tiny human.

I doubt any of the myriad disabilities that might necessitate a wheelchair do any of that.

Disgruntled Bus User

My MIL is highly entertained by the hysteria over getting prams on buses. She wonders how she ever managed to raise three children to adulthood in the days when everyone had to fold their prams....

Do you know what I'm so bloody fed up of this, I hope the op does complain especially to her local paper. Maybe they'll explain it in small words so people will understand.

i think the point is that a service should cater to their service users and buses should make themselves more accessible for pram users, who use the bus a lot. espescially if the government wants to discourage private car ownership.

bendy buses were vey good for pram users but have been phased out. i used to love it as i knew i would always find space.

wheel chair users should have priority.

for all those talking about we chose to have kids, well yes we did, and we also chose to get on the bus, and the wheelchair user also chose to get on the bus?

His attitude was spot on. People should be rude to inconsiderate shelfish twats imho.

In days gone past, people used to buy pushchairs that were easy to fold one-handed, and lift on to the bus, along with baby and half a week's shopping, didn't they.

Now they waltz on, park the small child with their face right in a corner, and say "Shut that damn racket" when the small child has the audacity to sound upset about being parked with nothing to see but the interior wall of the bus, which is 6cm from their face.

for all those talking about we chose to have kids, well yes we did, and we also chose to get on the bus, and the wheelchair user also chose to get on the bus?

And thus, the wheelchair user trumps you, as I expect they'd be very glad indeed if they didn't need a wheelchair any more.

"it can be impossible to fold buggy"

jesus wept.
It is impossible for a paralysed person to stand.
It is not impossible to fold a buggy.

Actually, it can be impossible to fold a buggy. But in that situation, which I have been in, I would immediately offer to get off the bus, and then get off. Immediately. No hanging about.

This is literally unbelievable. I frequently travelled by bus with two small people. Not a problem.

Well the wheelchair user didn't choose to get on the bus, did he? The OP made that choice on his behalf and chose for him to not be able to access the space designated for his use. She could have chosen for both of them to use the bus by doing what was required of her, but instead she chose to be mind-blowingly selfish and make the wheelchair user lose out because she didn't like a third party's manner.

It is a great pity the driver didn't take the bus out of service and announce that everyone would have to get off because of the actions of one selfish person. That might have rammed it home that the shocked looks of those around her were almost certainly due to her actions, not those of the driver.

And as far as a wheelchair user "choosing" to use the bus goes, please see my previous point about the relative difficulties involved in a person, possibly with multiple disabilities/health problems, getting themselves around in a non-motorised wheelchair, as opposed to an able-bodied mum pushing a pram around, ie doing what it was designed to do. If you have ever spent time in a wheelchair you will know that it is pretty bloody hard on the arms and shoulders.

Of course it's not impossible to fold a buggy

Anyone who finds it so, should really stay at home for a few days and practice it!

fair enough if you buy a non-folding buggy.
But then again if you buy a non-folding buggy and get the bus and stop wheelchair users from getting on once again you are a bit of a twat.

I offer you newborn twins + shopping. Where do you put them? I guarantee any solutions would likely take far longer than me just getting off with 'em.

Years ago everyone had a sturdy buggy and a 'bus buggy' that you could fold and clip with your foot and one hand.

It never fails to amuse me when I see women standing at the bus stop with huge 'travel systems'....scowling when the driver says there are already 2 buggies on.

I don't use a pram but I am seriously starting to wonder if they sell them with some sort of built-in system that causes instant helplessness and chronic me-me-me syndrome. Can someone clarify if this is the case or if there simply are that many inherently selfish and clueless people out there?

I chose a pushchair and sling combination to make it as easy to fold as possible, before the birth, but all in all, it always seemed easier to scoot off post-haste.

But Jessie - you are looking at it from the perfectly reasonable point of view of "Does the faff outweigh the benefit of staying on the bus? If yes then proceed to find solution that does not inconvenience someone else."

It's not impossible - you are just making a sensible and courteous decision to get off rather than fold.

True. I kinda did assume that was meant by impossible.

You think it wasn't?

No, unfortunately I think for many people "impossible" means "perfectly possible but will involve me putting myself out slightly and anyway why should I, s'not fair".

I also think that if the OP's son was able to understand what was being said, then he was old enough to get out of the damn buggy by himself and use his legs?

If there's one breed of bus user I despise, it's those with kids who can clearly walk (even for short periods) but who ignore wheelchair users, and other parents with much younger infants and babies, and hog the space for themselves.

Our loca transport company would not have allowed you to stay on the bus OP. Wheelchair users get priority always....as it should be.

Please do write your letter of complaint. Why not make a complete ass of yourself?

The op reminds me of the Mumsnetter this week who namechanged to pretend she was upset because a van's stereo woke up her PFB in his pram.

She was seemingly contemplating writing a letter of complaint, too.

Not that I'm saying anything. No implications here. Honest.

I would like to see that letter.....

"Dear Mr Very Senior Manager of Nasty Bus Company
I am writing to complain about a serious incident in which I was recently involved. It resulted in a wheelchair user being left at the bus-stop after I refused to fold my buggy. This led to me looking bad in front of my son and the other passengers.
Please let me know what you intend to do about this.
Regards
Angry Bus User"

kungfupanda

Perhaps we should bring back the cane for these people?