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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Selling the kids things and keeping the money

25 replies

BluMoon · 12/09/2011 11:53

I've recently put a load of the kids' things on ebay. This includes a wii which was very rarely played with (I bought them it for christmas a few years back, it was never looked after and barely used) and a game with accessories.

I should get around £60-£70 for them. Rather than give the money to the kids I'm thinking of
a) putting it on the holiday we've booked (which the kids will benefit from too obviously) or
b) putting it on my Next account which was used to buy the kids tons of clothes from the sale.

Or is it mean and should I split the money between the kids?

Just to add, the kids have also given me a few things of their own to sell on ebay which I will be giving them the money for (xbox games etc).

OP posts:

lisad123 · 12/09/2011 11:54

no, you brought it, and the money will go towards something for them anyways.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/09/2011 11:55

Not BU but I wouldnt do it personally.

Anything I sell of DS's I put the money in his bank account.

However, you are putting the money towards a nice holiday for the kids so they are still benefitting!

AuntiePickleBottom · 12/09/2011 11:55

sounds fine to me but i would put it on b/ to bring the bill down

Ormirian · 12/09/2011 11:56

How about selling the kids and keeping the money.

I've considered it.

HappyMummyOfOne · 12/09/2011 12:02

Not something I would do personally either, I'd put the money in their accounts. New clothes and holidays are nice but should come from the parents money not be selling the childrens gifts.

cat64 · 12/09/2011 12:07

This reply has been deleted

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YouCantTeuchThis · 12/09/2011 12:08

not sure where I stand on this actually...

I mean if you sell on your baby/toddler toys, do you also give the proceeds to the children?

Also, if you regard items as belonging to the children, would you allow them to sell them

allhailtheaubergine · 12/09/2011 12:08

I can't be the only one who was already clicking on the thread at "selling the kids"?

cat64 · 12/09/2011 12:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

KimberlyClark · 12/09/2011 12:12

i would keep money

only exception was if they had bought it with their own hard earned cash, but in that case i would expect them to be savvy enough to sell it themselves

otherwise it goes thus:

"here dcs, here is a nintendo wii"

"oh look, you haven't played with it/appreciated it, please, let me give you the cash instead"

me thinky no

Bartimaeus · 12/09/2011 12:12

Good question.
I suppose if they come to you wanting to sell them then you should give them the proceeds (just like if they did a car boot sale).
But at what age does this apply? Selling baby/toddler toys isn't the same, and you could argue that by passing on toys to a younger sibling the older one doesn't get money they could get by selling them IYSWIM?

Do they know you're selling it? Have they asked for the money? Maybe save the money and give it them as their spending money whilst on holiday? Saves you a bit extra and they can still "see" the money they got from the wii.....

Bartimaeus · 12/09/2011 12:14

Actually I'm sliding off the fence onto the "don't give them the money" side.

Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 12/09/2011 12:15

You bought them, you'll presumably buy them other things, I think it's entirely fine for you to sell them (given that they're not used) and use the money towards family things. You're not nicking their favourite doll and selling it for gin.

Original poster

BluMoon · 12/09/2011 12:17

They do know I'm selling it and have not asked for the money. However DS has since asked if he can sell a couple of his wrestling figures (that he bought with his own pockey money) and he knows full well the money would go into his account without question.

Teh wii is different though as it's been stuck in the living room drawer for god knows how long and the last time it was used was when I actually bought a wii fit for myself.

OP posts:

slavetofilofax · 12/09/2011 12:26

I wouldn't have a problem with you not directly giving the children the money, but I don't think the money from their present should pay for clothes or a holiday. Those are both things that the parents are responsible for paying for.

I would put the money towards something else the children want and would directly benefit from and enjoy. Like a day trip of their choice, a laptop that they can play with, new bikes, their first phones if they are old enough. Stuff like that, so that they actually learn that these things have value and you can't have it all. They should have some choice and some say in how the money is spent. You could even let them have the cash as their holiday spending money, so they can pay for their own souveniers or books for the journey or whatever.

But I do think its unfair to use the money to pay for the holiday that you chose and they have no choice in going on, or on clothes that they have to have.

ChunkyPickle · 12/09/2011 12:31

Keep it. It's all very well saying that some things are your responsibility to pay for, but it's not exactly fiscally sound to put money in their bank account (that presumably they're not allowed to use yet) to earn bugger all interest if you have credit accounts that you're paying a big APR on.

Deux · 12/09/2011 12:41

I would have no qualms keeping the money. I mean, why wouldn't you?

If you are anything like me there will have been countless times when your children have been given money as a gift and it's been earmarked for spending on a toy and then you end up paying for the toy and the money is in their piggy bank still.

I think you should treat yourself to something with the proceeds, something that you would not normally buy for yourself as you'd see it as indulgent otherwise. .

Dirtydishesmakemesad · 12/09/2011 12:43

If i had money spare then i would probably use the money to buy something nice for the kids, if i was short of money then i woukd put it towards food/bills without feeling too guilty tbh maybe that makes me awful but things are bought in order of importance no matter where the money comes from.

MrsSleepy · 12/09/2011 12:45

Nope I'd keep the money... How old are the kids?

cornflakegirl · 12/09/2011 12:57

If I sell things like computer games that were gifts to DS, then I give him the money. However, I happily stash away toys he's outgrown to regift to DS2 at birthday / Christmas, so am entirely inconsistent. As long as the kids are happy with it, I wouldn't worry.

LEMONAIDE · 12/09/2011 13:00

If you are anything like me - they children spend way more of my money than I do so id keep it as they will end up spending it for me anyway!!

MsGee · 12/09/2011 13:32

I would use it for spending money for the hols. Or let them chose some clothes but make sure they know that the money is being shared amongst the family (assuming the wii was family property).

My folks sold my toys when I was younger (and wouldn't tell me about it). It still pisses me off to be honest. At 7 or 10 I didn't think about how they had paid for it, so fair enough. I was just annoyed that my toys were being flogged.

EssexGurl · 12/09/2011 14:29

I regularly sell things at the NCT nearly new sale and the money goes into my bank account. I'm a SAHM and pretty much all my spending is on something for the kids, so if it is in my bank account, it gets spent on them anyway.

Honeymum · 12/09/2011 14:44

Pfft! Of course you should keep the money. Kids are blooming expensive and you will never stop spending on them either directly or indirectly. I wouldn't hesitate.

littlegreenalien · 12/09/2011 14:44

I wouldn't have a problem with doing that but making the dc aware that the money is going in the holiday fund/holiday spending money fund or whatever so that you don't appear to be just taking "their" stuff for your own financial gain because you felt like it/thought it was a good idea. (That is a whole other message to be sending out).

We sold a, frankly too big for our house, massive plastic play kitchen for more than we had even paid for it second hand, (little tikes stuff goes on and on and on) and when the youngest decided 6 months later that he actually missed it and wanted it back I reminded him what we had spent the proceeds on which was a really fun day out for the children and he was perfectly happy, just needed reminding that we hadn't taken away the dc's toys with no benefit to them.

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