To think I should get an extra lie in

[Sunflowergirl2011]

hope you can help solve a silly argument between DH and me. We have a 1yr old and a 2 yr old so sleep is at a premium in our house! During the week we get up at similar times, him for work, me with the children. On weekends we always disagree about who should get a lie in. He thinks we should get one each,
I think that as I am the one who gets up in the night if the children wake up ( unless they both wake up in which case we both do), I should get both lie ns if I like! I don't mind ( much!) that often he doesn't wake up in the night when do, but I do think that the lost sleep and broken sleep should mean I get the bonus lie ins. AIBU?
PS- I have other ways to 'persuade him' iyswim , but we genuinely can't see where the other is coming from on this so would appreciate your views.

Then I feel sad for you tbh. It's lovely having a nice cuddly sofa day with the children.

What can I say? I have average children.

Don't pity me my energetic children.

I don't sit around in my pyjamas all day unless I'm unwell, what a waste of a day.

I knew that was coming next!

I don't habitually sit around in my pyjamas, but my children love a relaxed day as much as a very energetic one. That's what children are like.

You get the perfect mother badge for the day though. Congratulations.

Happy horse- that sound like a good idea :) thanks. As for the chilled out on the sofa day, well I must be doing something wrong because neither of mine sit still long enough for that to be an option! And as someone who works part time I can MUCH easier cope with a day in the office on hardly any sleep than I can a day with the children.

Glad you seem to have got some answers Sunflowergirl. Very nice use of the English language there Youhavenopower, not sure I'd swear at someone who was merely pointing out what a reasonable, accommodating wife you were based on the limited facts you'd posted.

One each and he can do night duty on Fridays and Saturdays.

Your girls will just have to get used to it. If he doesn't wake to them, bug him til he does.

Sorted. Next!

One each. If you're only getting up twice a week, you are doing well. If you are still tired, you can nap with dcs.

One lie in each. If you are a SAHM or on maternity leave, then I reckon doing the night wakings is just part of the deal. I always saw night times as my responsibility when I was on ML. When I returned to work part time, we'd split night wakings between us for nights when we each had work the next morning, or I would do the ones when I had a day off next day. Weekends were always split.

Even if your kids have grown out of day time naps, when you're a SAHM you can have down time when you just slob at home with the kids in pjs. You don't have to be looking good, bright and smiley and hitting targets. So I think it's reasonable to take on the night wakings as part and parcel of being at home. I don't think it follows logically that you 'deserve' both weekend lie ins

Oh god have just read the whole thread.

Pmsl at those women who try to equate looking after children with a high powered stressful job.

Of course you can do low key 'down' days with kids. It doesn't mean you're slobbing on the sofa with 'the telly on all day. Be creative about it. Intersperse a bit of cbeebies with bunging the kids in the buggy and having a tramp around town. Make sandwiches for lunch to keep it simple. Bring a load of toys and games into the sitting room and settle yourself on the sofa. You don't even need to get the kids dressed if it's too much hassle. My kids had a few walks in the buggy with snowsuits over their pjs! Oh and housework can be a bare minimum if you've had a bad night. About sixty seconds to bung a load of laundry in 'the washer and press a button. Oh and anyone who can post on here could also order their shopping on line- so no need for a stressful supermarket run.

And I'm not saying looking after preschool kids is totally easy, of course it isn't. I did it on maternity leaves and on my days off work. But tbh the main pressures are that a lot of the tasks are repetitive and also it can feel isolating at times. But it isn't difficult work! No way can you compare it with the pressures of a demanding paid job. Always makes me chuckle when some women say they'd rather do a 15 hour day in the office than be at home with the kids... Hmm either they must have had a ridiculously easy job 'pre children, or they've forgotten what the world of work is really like. I don't know many employers these days who pay you to just sit around having a doddle of a day!

couldn't agree more donthateme I'm a sahm have been for pretty much 15 years with a couple of years HE in the middle and I am dreading the day when my youngest is in full time school and I have to head back into the workplace. Having said that I'm lucky enough to have a supportive husband and older kids who pull their own weight around the house. Some of the sahm I know are doing everything including mothering their own husbands....that is not a job I envy at all

Lie-ins are over-rated. Not worth fretting over. The DCs will be teenagers before too long and you can have as many lie-ins as you like then.

Yabu you should have one each

I was always up with the children in the week so my husband always got up with them at the weekend.

You should have a lie in each.

We have 4 kids and have always adopted the one lie in each rule. And I used to do all the night wakings etc...