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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be a bit fed up with nursery with overly strict no nuts policy

23 replies

timetosleepnow · 06/09/2011 22:26

Nursery implemented nut ban few years ago and I was perfectly happy with it. This moved onto not allowing any breakfast with 'traces of nuts' in it and once again we are very happy that nursery is doing all they can to protect children with nut allergy.

Now I have a 7 month old who struggles taking enough formula milk per day, so I have to make his breakfast with formula, then add Weetabix or Ready Break in it. None of these contain ANY traces of nuts. But nursery has chucked away breakfast I made this week, reason being I have not given them the box to make it up themselves, so they can't check what's in it despite us saying it's just weetabix and ready break. I said I'm very happy to give them boxes of cereals for them to make up for me. But it turns out they can't make the breakfast for me as I would have pre-measured milk powder in his breakfast container(What?! They are not allowed to pour some boiling water into my pre-measured milk powder in a breakfast container and then add his cereal in??!!)

I'm probably being completely unreasonable and it is soooo petty I know but have to have a rant anyway.

OP posts:

RandomMess · 06/09/2011 22:29

Can you not make it and give them the cereal box?

Or give them cartons of formula to use (very expensive though)

Vallhala · 06/09/2011 22:29

So why can't you just do as they've asked and provide the cereal boxes as proof? Or am I being dense and missing something?

MmeLindor. · 06/09/2011 22:29

Do they have a severely allergic child in the nursery?

If they do, then as hard as it is, I think you are going to have to live with it. If it were your child, you would not want them to risk his life on the off chance that one of the other parents decided to give her child something with nuts in it.

Can you give them a pre-packed breakfast?

Original poster

timetosleepnow · 06/09/2011 22:30

Sorry, I should add that they did say I can give them cartons of milk.. but apart from cartons being so bloody expensive plus a complete waste of the rest of the carton not being used, I doubt it would be easy to heat up and make certain porridge with anyhow, and somehow I don't have confidence in nursery storing the carton straight into the fridge for later use, safe enough for baby to drink. Arrghh... baby baby brain. Rant over.

OP posts:

ProfessionallyOffendedGoblin · 06/09/2011 22:32

I used to make mine porridge and ready brek and add a spoonful of ground almonds. So it's probably parents like me that they are worried about.
You may have to look for alternative nurseries if it's too much bother.

gomez · 06/09/2011 22:32

So box of cereal plus tin of formula and they add together with water. Else you provide carton of milk plus cereal if they are not keen on making up milk.

Original poster

timetosleepnow · 06/09/2011 22:34

No, they want to make it up themselves, not just proof. Initially I also thought that's all they wanted but no. I must not make it myself. Perhaps I could go in with a flask, milk powder and the breakfast cereal box and make it before their eyes before running to work?

Pre-packed breakfasts.. You mean the baby pouches/jars?

OP posts:

bruffin · 06/09/2011 22:34

"If it were your child, you would not want them to risk his life on the off chance that one of the other parents decided to give her child something with nuts in it."

Most parents of children with nut allergies don't want no nut bans, also the anaphylaxis campaign don't recommend them either.

(DS and DH have nut allergies)

cantspel · 06/09/2011 22:35

If a nursery cant be trusted by you to put some milk in the fridge are you sure you trust them with what i assume is your pfb?

Vallhala · 06/09/2011 22:36

One of the DC in my family is a nut allergy sufferer. Sorry but I'd rather you had a small amount of extra expense than a child die of an anaphylactic attack.

There is far more risk of a child dying of that than a bunch of trained nursery professionals killing your DC with ineffective milk storage... and if they are that incompetent then it's time for you all to seek alternative care.

gomez · 06/09/2011 22:36

X-post re: carton.

Can you not send a bottle made up? (disclaimer not that experienced with formula protocol)

Or baby rice gunk that has formula already in?

Or give him more milk a different time and make breakfast with water or cows milk (is that still allowed at 6 mths?)

MmeLindor. · 06/09/2011 22:36

Bruffin
why is that then? Now that you posted, I seem to remember reading about it, but cannot remember the reasoning.

Pre-packed breakfast - not sure what you can get in UK, I used to give DD a jar of Hipp breakfast cereal.

lydiamama · 06/09/2011 22:37

that is quite a dilemma. I suppose they actually have allergic children in their care, don't they? because they are being extremely cautious. For sure sure they can prepare formula, as they will have some babies in their care, and they can not make his cereals with cow milk yet as he is only 7, so they will have to use formula, I am pretty sure it has been a misunderstanding, have another calm chat with them, give them the cereal boxes and ask them to add formula milk to them, good luck

RandomMess · 06/09/2011 22:40

I think they are just following the correct protocol. They are not to make up formula and they obviously guarantee a nut free environment. TBH though how much formula does he get via breakfast, probably so little I would just let him have cows milk or water.

My youngest gave up bf rapidly as soon as she was weaned, by 10 months down to 1 feed per day and she gave that up at 11 months. My eldest was similar but too long ago to remember anything but she wouldn't drink formula at 12 months old. Middle 2 milk aholics.

mercibucket · 06/09/2011 22:40

can they make up his bottle of milk and then instead of giving it him in a bottle, tip it into a bowl and add some weetabix to it? sounds so simple I'm wondering what the catch it . . .

Pawsnclaws · 06/09/2011 22:41

Sorry but I think yabu. My son (2) went into anaphylactic shock two weeks ago after putting a cashew to his mouth. Within seconds his lips had blistered, within a minute his face and throat had swollen and he was unresponsive. His blood pressure dropped dramatically and his heart rate raced as his body struggled to keep going. Luckily he was swiftly treated in A and E and made a full recovery, but life has now changed pretty dramatically for us over the last few weeks. Suddenly we have to watch everything he eats, read every label, and have an epipen at hand. Scary stuff.

But this was a completely unexpected reaction and one day could be your child. I don't blame the nursery in the least for taking such action. Someone said to me a week or so ago that no one will care as much as you do about your child's safety, and I think that's right - I have to assume that other parents will be less careful about labelling etc, and so does your nursery.

Vallhala · 06/09/2011 22:43

For older DC I'd agree with bruffin but in a baby/toddler environment I feel it's different and it's wise to err on the side of caution.

johnthepong · 06/09/2011 22:47

cant your baby have cows milk on his breakfast?

bruffin · 06/09/2011 22:51

"why is that then? Now that you posted, I seem to remember reading about it, but cannot remember the reasoning."

There are a few reasons

First of all it leads to a false sense of security, you can never guarantee a complete nut ban.

secondly - nuts are not the only food that causes anaphylaxis. Why ban just nuts, when some people have the same reaction to milk, seeds, eggs and even things like glue.

Children need to learn to take responsibility for their allergy from as early as possible. Learning to ask if things have got nuts etc.

From the anaphylaxis campaign website

"Nut bans

Some schools choose to enforce ?nut bans?, where it is forbidden for any pupil to bring the problem food to school. However, without wishing to undermine the good intentions of any school taking this approach, The Anaphylaxis Campaign believes there are several pitfalls in this approach. It would be impossible to provide an absolute nut-free guarantee so the danger is that allergic children may be led into a false sense of security. There is a strong case for arguing that food-allergic children will gain a better awareness of their allergies, and learn avoidance strategies, if they move in an environment where allergens may turn up unexpectedly."

MmeLindor. · 06/09/2011 22:54

Ah, yes. That makes sense.

However, the OP is talking about a nursery where the children are not yet able to take responsibility for their allergy.

I would actually be quite pleased that the nursery were taking this so seriously as it shows that they are being careful with the children.

bruffin · 06/09/2011 22:58

I do realise that nursery is slightly different, but what would they do about milk in a nursery setting, they can't exactly ban milk in nursery can they.

Signet2012 · 06/09/2011 23:05

Bruffin totally agree.

Im 28, had my first reaction at 6 when it was not at all "popular" "known of" etc to have allergies. It was to nuts. No idea what Nut, no allergy testing etc just a case of "you went blue swollen and unable to breathe & nearly died whilst eating a nut. Dont eat them again" Nobody actually knew I was allergic to nuts as it just wasnt really discussed. I knew not to go near them, I knew to check things first.

Im lucky in the sense I can also tell immediately if something has nuts in by an electric shock sensation in my tongue so can immediately medicate/spit it out etc depending on severity of episode. I've self managed and take full responsibility. Ive never went out to eat and said "i have a nut allergy" mainly because Im stupid, but also because I dont like people knowing! A recent DP and family meal out, DP had phoned ahead to see what the menu was like thinking of me and the fact I cant eat nuts and mentioned I had an allergy when he booked the table, When the party arrived a lady shouted infront of everyone "whose the one allergic to nuts?" Que me going bright red and she then proceeded to WRITE IT ON THE PLACEMAT!! I was not very happy about this and commented and it was down to "their insurance" Made me laugh to think Ive managed to keep myself alive for 28 years without this kind of treatment!

My DP thinks im insane but my reasoning is simple. Everyone is that scared of being sued they say "may have nuts in" on anything. This means you either 1) dont eat anything ever again 2) potentially die everytime you eat. So you cant actually listen to anyone!

OP - Why would the nursery give another child your childs breakfast Nuts isnt the only allergy?! What if the child who gets your childs breakfast by mistake has a severe reaction!? ITs a bit silly really.

Signet2012 · 06/09/2011 23:07

Severe milk allergy and has a reaction - that should say!!

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