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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not expect my boss to go through my bag after a suspected theft?

62 replies

fartmeistergeneral · 31/08/2011 08:50

I work in a very small business. I've been there 5 years, one person has been there 10 years and the other 3 full time staff (including the owner) have been there since the beginning (20 years). There is also one temporary worker who none of us know that well (keeps himself to himself). Recently a 3 figure sum has gone missing. We do open to the public and it is possible (though unlikely IMO) that someone has come into the office and managed to find money, taken it and left without any member of staff seeing them. However, it's also possible that it's been mislaid and bundled away in a file somewhere to be found in a few months' time (or years!).

The staff were talking when the boss wasn't there and saying they'd be happy for him to go through their bags to check they weren't the thief and I was the only one who said that I'd be pissed off if he had so little trust in me or the others that he would actually go through our stuff. They then said it would be totally fair if he went through everyone's bags not just one person - but that would make no difference to me. I'd still feel he didn't trust me after all these years.

AIBU? (never posted in AIBU before and am bracing myself for impact!!!).

OP posts:
DoMeDon · 31/08/2011 08:52

YABU

troisgarcons · 31/08/2011 08:56

Two ways of looking at it: the obvious one isn't distrust but of proving innocence. Although, a thief would have to be particularly stupid to steal and leave the booty in a handbag or on premises where it can be found.

A favourite method, so I'm told, at the local 6th form college when stealing a phone, is to wrap it in a plastic bag and pop it in the toilet cistern.

lovelybertha · 31/08/2011 08:57

YANBU. Ridiculous idea.

Has your boss actually mentioned doing this, or were your colleagues just discussing it as a possibility?

You don't say when the money went missing, but it would seem unlikely that if it was taken by a member of staff they would be carrying it about in their handbag.

AnotherJaffaCake · 31/08/2011 08:57

YABU. I'd be the first in the queue to prove it wasn't me. I'd be quite happy to let my boss search through the manky old tissues, soggy biscuits, and other rubbish the children seem to dump in my bag. At least he'd never want to experience that again :o.

Original poster
fartmeistergeneral · 31/08/2011 09:04

It has been mentioned in passing as in, if any more money goes missing that might be a possibility - at which point my colleagues were eager to say 'we don't mind you looking through our stuff'. I remained silent. I get the whole 'prove your innocence thing', but I would still be offended to think that he didn't trust me or any of the others in the office after years and years of service (and frankly, bending over backwards to make a success of a small business).

OP posts:
southmum · 31/08/2011 09:16

YABU

If you have nothing to hide why make a fuss? Dont make this about you personally, its not about not trusting YOU, its about your boss not being able to just pick one person to search so they will have to search all or none.

I worked in a shop where someone had worked there for 8 years and was lifting out of the till and overringing. Initially I was the prime suspect as I had only worked there for 3 months

lovelybertha · 31/08/2011 09:16

Sounds like your colleagues are making dramatic statements to somehow demonstrate how 'honest' they are. It's like the Jeremy Kyle "I'll take a lie detector test to prove it" thing.

Just remain silent and stop worrying about it. I don't think it'll ever get to the point where your boss asks to go through your bag.

LittleJennyRobyn · 31/08/2011 09:19

Wouldn't bother me at all, if i knew i was innocent then dont really see a problem as long as i wasn't singled out and the same applied for everyone.

You say that you'd be offended to think that your boss didn't trust you or the others.
Many people can be trustworthy for years and years and then for whatever reason out of sheer desperation, a moment of insanity, etc,
can do something totally out of character, which shocks everybody....you do hear of it..

your boss is NBU in wanting to find his missing money.

Filibear · 31/08/2011 09:19

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

ellangirl · 31/08/2011 09:25

YANBU. Perhaps your colleagues are shouting loudly about how innocent they are, because they know full well they've stashed it somewhere else!! I would hate it if someone searched through anything of mine, and I haven't got anything remotely interesting to hide!

mummymccar · 31/08/2011 09:27

I know it feels insulting but they have to do this. If your boss reports the theft to the police the first thing they'll do is ask if all bags have been searched. The fact that he is suggesting maybe searching your bags days after the theft says to me that he doesn't really believe that any of you have done it.

RebelFromTheWaistDown · 31/08/2011 09:32

YANBU

GwendolenHarleth · 31/08/2011 09:32

So are you assuming it must be the "one temporary worker who none of us know that well (keeps himself to himself)? "

mumeeee · 31/08/2011 09:33

YABU. If your boss was going to search bags he would have to search everyone's. It isn't about not trusting you but being fair to everyone.

Mitmoo · 31/08/2011 09:34

Search all or search none. Personally I'd do what I could to help the boss find the £100 whereever it is. I had the experience as a 16 year old of being accused of stealing a missing tenner by an evil old harridan who had worked for the company for years, I was new and young fair target.

I was totally devastated the other staff went mental at the evil old harridan for daring to point the finger at me then had a go at the accountant for questioning me just on the old bags word. I was glad he did because he said everything I had said balanced with the cash boxes and what evil bag had said didn't. (Can you tell I have not forgiven herGrin)

This gave me great comfort afterwards as they trusted me while the money was still missing. Boss offered to drive me home but I couldn't rest until it was found. Later in the day someone came in to pay their £10 bill but it was ticked on the sheet as already paid. The harridan had marked it as paid, couldn't balance her spreadsheet so accused me of stealing.

So you are right to assume it hasn't necessarily been stolen it could still all be innocent.

niceguy2 · 31/08/2011 10:04

I'd be pissed off if he had so little trust in me or the others

YABU. It's a small business and the chances are that one of the staff has stolen a '3 figure sum' from the owner. A loss I assume he will have to make up and in effect comes directly from his pocket.

In that context I think the trust issues are far worse for him/her. Can you imagine you work your bollocks off, employ a few people, work every hour god sends then someone decides to steal from you?

AKMD · 31/08/2011 10:31

YANBU, if anyone's searching bags it's the police, not your boss going through all the crumbs, sanitary towels, used tissues etc. (usualy contents of my bag Blush

When I was 16 I had a Saturday job at an independent gift shop. All the staff were female until a boy around my age was taken on. On his first day the manager took an instant dislike to him and was already going on about how his black trousers 'weren't black enough' and picking up on every mistake he made - it was his first day!!!! Later in the day, the deputy manager's mobile phone went missing and the manager went through all our lockers, finding nothing, although she had already told everyone that she 'knew' this poor boy had stolen it. The mobile phone was later found on top of a rack in the staff room and she said he had put it there to take home later. He was sacked :( To this day I still believe that the manager and deputy manager faked the 'theft' just to get rid of him and I still feel sorry for that boy.

reelingintheyears · 31/08/2011 10:33

YANBU.

StrandedBear · 31/08/2011 10:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pippilongsmurfing · 31/08/2011 10:36

If I hadn't done anything wrong then I would not mind my boss looking in my bag (whilst I was there), but I would be a bit annoyed that s/he didn't trust me.

It's like that poster on here that "knew for certain" the Sky engineer had stolen her engagement ring, reported him to his boss and the police, and she then found it in her bedroom (where it had gone missing from). Hmm

It is far more likely it has been misplaced/counted imo.

reelingintheyears · 31/08/2011 10:37

If it's cash you could have hidden it anywhere not just put it in your bag.

I would say no to going through my bag and he can call the police to do it if he really thinks one of the staff is a thief.

He has absolutely no right to do this and neither do security in shops have this right.
They rely on people not knowing their rights and should call the police if they suspect shoplifting.

GypsyMoth · 31/08/2011 10:39

My dd works at 'next'.... A manager stands at the door and all bags are checked before the employees leave. Don't know if that's all branches, but I don't like it

juicychops · 31/08/2011 10:40

when i worked in retail as a saturday job when i was 16-17 every member of staff had to have their bags searched on leaving the store to go home by a member of management. No one really thought anything of it.

if i was in a place of work and something went missing, i would be pissed off at having my bag searched but would understand the logic. and those who kicked up a stink about it would look like the guilty ones

reelingintheyears · 31/08/2011 10:40

My DS works at next too.

I shall have to ask him if they do this at his shop.

juicychops · 31/08/2011 10:44

my shop is primark. dp who works there still said they still do this bag check

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