to just not know whether I should look to change job or not

[Himalayanbalsam]

There are things about my job that I don't like and I am woefully underpaid (honestly). However I work in a field where you have the opportunity to know clients really well. Those clients die - often. This year has been particularly bad. I am on holiday at the moment and my colleague absolutely rightly sent me an e-mail today telling me of the death of a client. She thought I might want to go to the funeral. I can't because we are away but she was right to tell me.

Thing is - I sit here thinking do I actually want a job where you get e-mails on holiday to say someone has died - or do I really want a job, any job where you don't get that? Is it a benefit or a curse? Can I actually walk away? Or can I actually keep doing it?

Death is a fact of life; if I'm on holiday I would expect to be notified of the death of a colleague or client in order that I could send condolences at the appropriate time.

However, in general, I do not be expect to be contacted on work related matters while I am on leave unless I have expressly asked to be kept up to speed or my input is vital to a matter in hand.

As to whether you can keep doing your job or walk away from it, that is entirely a matter for you to decide as you are best placed to know your financial and other cirumstances.