To wonder why some sonographers are so tactless?

[nosexpleaseimpregnant]

I've been mulling this over for the past couple of weeks now and I was just wondering if anybody else has had a bad experience when having a scan?
Almost 2 weeks ago we went for the dating scan, booked by the antenatal team based on dates from an early pegnancy scan. Whilst me and OH were quite happy/excited to see what we have made the sonographer started mumbling that baby seemed small and she couldn't make it more than 11 weeks. She turned to us and said 'baby's a bit small. Did you consent to the downs screening?'. At which point me and OH looked at each other with a WTF? look. She merrily returned to scanning my stomach and OH blurted out....'Is there something wrong?' to which she said 'No I was just making sure you had handed the form in'
She asked me to go out and drink some more water to see if she could improve the scan and then, whilst sitting staring at my drink thinking the worst she came out and said 'ok I figured it out. The early pregnancy scan showed you were 5w+ 6 days. We've documented it as 6w+ 5 days. Panic over. But you'll need to come back next week as you are only 11w+0'
I didn't know whether I was more relieved or pissed off at the general lack of consideration shown to us in the first place!!
Any other bad experiences out there?

OvO. Did you read my post. Not everyone who scans is a Sonographer. 'Some stories'. Like 'Some Sonographers'.

Oh and the dr's excuse for being tactless? Cultural differences.

The Op said AIBU to wonder why some sonogrophers are so tactless. Not the whole profession. That's a fair point I think, why should everyone be trained to deal as kindly as possible to a woman who may very well likely be bricking it. Your anecdotal evidence is no more statistics than her anecdotal evidence whatever your job

cross post that will tech me to F5 evry so often

Too Nobody here is tarring the entire profession - posters are sharing their personal experiences, whether they have been good or bad.

What I don't understand is why you would then take this so personally that you are insinuating that some posters are lying? Simply because bad experiences haven't happened around you, doesn't mean it hasn't happened.

Your evidence IS anecdotal, it is hearsay, just as everyone else's is.

nosexplease...Sorry but that doesn't sound too bad- the Doctor gave him the facts as they stood... Maybe I do have a problem!!!
Enjoy the rest of your pregnacy and if unhappy- complain. Bad service should never be expected- whatever the setting.

Oh well as long as you only believe SOME people on this thread are lying. perhaps we should all ask MNHQ to change our posts to 'the person who scanned us' just to make sure we don't unfairly accuse a sonographer of being tactless because you've met loads more than me and know none of them would ever say anything like that.

And yes, I AM being arsey.

I think there is a question about whether a lack of empathy is OK in a health care professional.

I'm sorry you felt a bit let down. If you look at it objectively, the train of her thought was 'the baby's measuring 11 weeks, if that's the case we can't do the NT scan, I'll just check if they've filled the form in for it'. I would like to think there was no malicious, tactless behaviour, merely a process of measurements/questions. She was doing her job exactly as she should have done. The silent implication was not given by her, it's just one of those things that you heard. You put 2 and 2 together and got 5. Nobody's fault and when you asked she immediately clarified nothing was wrong.

I've met some really lovely, kind, thoughtful, genuine sonographers. All of them in fact. I did have a scan with a consultant once when bleeding in early pregnancy and the man was a cruel and nasty man who gave no thought whatsoever to the feelings of grieving parents. He was just a cock though. His job was irrelevant.

Wow toomany this was a young man in his prime (and a mechanic) and you say that doesn't sound too bad I agree, you have issues with how to act in a humane way and be sensitive towards other people. I have worked for the NHS for 10 years and, despite being cynical, every patient gets treated as an individual not one in a line of hundreds. Giving any sort of news needs to be adapted to the person you are giving it too, we're not robots.
And I'm not unhappy, just stunned by the lack of tact that some people show in a scary time.

Are there guidelines for HCPs about how a patient should be treated, in terms of the manner in which information is given to them?

I think that the stories on here show that some hcp are lacking in tact and common decency. Some also seem oblivious / uncaring about the fact that they are dealing with hormonal, scared women.

One sonographer told me - whilst waiting for an early scan at recurrent mc clinic - she wouldn't book me a 12 week scan until they'd done the scan that day - just in case. I can see in her eyes it saved her clicking a button a few times but I found her approach upsetting.

The consultant who scanned me during last pg could not have been kinder when he broke the news that our baby had a terminal condition. I could not fault him. The bereavement office however were horrible ( when questioning funeral arrangements I was told I could come collect my 'specimen' myself if I didn't like their plans).

It's a hard are to work in and most hcp are incredible. Unfortunately we tend to remember the crap ones.

Area to work in ... Twatting iPhone

mrsgee I am so sorry for the loss of your baby, please tell me they didn't really call him/her a "specimen"! :(

I hope if you were unable to speak out at the time that maybe you will write a letter now describing your treatment because that is disgusting.

downawell there certainly are guidelines. In my trust they run a workshop on how to break news to patients. Such fundamental news will always be ingrained in your memory which is why you should think about what you are saying/doing before you say/do it and also the manner in which you carry out the news breaking. You would think it's common sense but apparently not! I'd be mortified if one of my patients said I was insensitive and rude and I always treat as individuals, everyone's different.
It can work both ways, trying to be too sensitive. I once accompanied a doctor to speak to a relative about the fact his wife was unlikely to survive the next hour. She talked for nearly 20 mins, skirting aroung the issue and taking note of her training, but he was clearly getting worked up. I ended up interrupting and asking if he understood or if he need the info in easier to understand terms. His reply was 'yes, is she going to die?' and the doctor finally said 'I'm sorry but yes, she will likely pass away in the next hour'. He then asked why she hadn't said that in the first place. Healthcare is a minefield and it comes with experience.

Nosexplease- Tried to leave you on a pleasant note, no need for you to be nasty in return...If you are indeed a HCP I would be very, very careful. The scenario you mentioned re: loss of limb and the profession of the patient may be identifiable...In your words- healthcare Is a minefield, don't let too much sharing on-line come back and bite you on the bum at work...
Have a nice evening.

Wow.

The man working at Whipps Cross (don't know his name but mid 30's black guy) deserves a mention for being wonderful at his job.

I don't think it sounds bad from the OP. The alternative is that they carry out the scan in silence and I think that's the way it will go in future if hospitals receive complaints at the conduct of their staff. To be honest, I'd rather a chatty one any day, at least she answered your questions and you weren't left worrying.

The point is that if there are guidelines, that should cover the staff who lack empathy; they just need to do as the guidelines say, and managers should make sure they do follow guidelines if they lack tact/understanding of others' points of view.

Communicating with customers has to be dealt with in all areas of work, and it's not that hard to avoid appalling faux pas.

Lola sadly they did - and thank you. It was one of many distressing comments. I told the specialist midwife (not that she was much better - kept banging on about how baby would have died no matter what - as if that was my silver lining!). I have given up on nhs in respect to this situation - nurses, gps, bereavement office, counsellors have all added to the pain to be honest - and I am someone who loves the nhs.

Well perhpas the 'guidelines' need to be extremely well-defined so that staff know exactly what the must and must not say. I'd rather have a sonographer that knows their job inside out and gets good scan results, regardless of their demenour.

I'm not saying this in response to the OP actually, just in response to the seemingly hundreds of complaints on MN about professionals supposedly not doing their jobs properly, as judged by lay-people and posters who weren't even witness to it.

My dd relapsed. She was in agony and screaming in pain. My quiet brave girl who never complained. The bone marrow in her bones was expanding pushing and full of leukemia.

The only thing that would stop the pain was chemotherapy. Before she could have it she would have to be scanned.

We had to transfer her to a trolley and wheel her writhing with pain through a busy hospital with everyone staring and she was crying and pleading with me to make it all stop.

When we got to the department the person who was to scan her sighed and looked at her watch, rolled her eyes and said 'do I have to do this now?' She then started arguing with the nurses about how they should have called ahead (they had) and other various breaches of protocol she thought they had made.

My 13 year old was in agony. I knew that she was probably going to die now she had relapsed and this woman was moaning and bickering.

It is the first and only time I have screamed at a HCP. I felt like my voice was going to explode my head. I felt like the whole hospital was staring at me. It was like I was going mad. I couldnt stop apologising to my DD for shouting.

Dont tell me that sonographers or scanners or whatever you want to call them do not do these things because you have lovely colleagues.

I spent two years in and out of hospitals and most of the HCPs I met were wonderful. Some were meh and a handful were utter fuckers. Utter and total fuckers.

:( That's horrible