to think I should not be threatened with a ban for questioning the use of offensive language?

[thefirstMrsDeVere]

I am a member of a very heavily moderated website. Swearing is not allowed at all, threads are pulled regularly if people are mean to each other, not threads about threads are tolerated and you are not allowed to mention anything said before on the boards at all. All these things will result in deletion and warnings.

I have been a member for years (before mumsnet even). There was a particularly nasty thread that was allowed to go on for pages which ended with a woman referring to children with LDs as 'being tapped in the head'..

I started a seperate thread wanting to discuss the use of disabilist language on the site and asking why words like bitch, whore and piss were not allowed yet retard, mong and spaz were.

I was told that some people might think it was ok to use those words so they couldnt filter them out, it wouldnt be fair.

I continuned to question this in a firm but polite manner and have now discovered I have been sent a message telling me that my style of posting is offensive and I have been taken straight to a final warning!

Not that I give a toss, the site is crap. I guess I am taken aback that you can be pretty much threatened into silence if you dare question the mods on this HUGE and well known site.

Its an issue that means a lot to me. If it was a site on which everything went language wise I wouldnt have bothered. But on this prissy site where you cant say bugger - you can call something retarded or monged out with no bother.

I think its bollocks and makes me glad I have mumsnet to come and tell people to fuck off on.

I think the 'if people have been homophobic or racist and nasty to disabled people' poster doesn't quite grasp your point.
btw always love your work on Netmums,

MP, the FB page is "Mumsnet Sucks"

Am not linking it, just type into FB search engine

I can't access your link MrsDV.

Dagnamit.

Sorry, MrsD, but because I don't belong to that other site I'm not allowed to view your thread.

Should I throw myself out of my (ground floor) window now?

You have received a message from the moderating team at Netmums Coffeehouse
Dear,

You have received a message from the moderating team at Netmums Coffeehouse.

Reason:
---
OM 1: Official General conduct or behaviour message

Hello

The Coffeehouse Moderating team monitor the behaviour of the members using the forums. Occasionally we are alerted to specific members and their style of posting by other Staff and members. It sometimes becomes necessary to contact members with regard to their conduct on the boards, if we feel this is inappropriate.

We are contacting you as your general conduct on the Coffeehouse over a period of time has been unacceptable and we now feel we need to contact you Officially with regard to your style of posting and persistant rule breaking on the forum and to request that you consider your posts carefully before submitting.

Please take a moment to read our Forum Netiquette and Forum Rules which will help you remain within the rules of the forum and prevent us needing to contact you in the future

The Official Message system is set out below

Official Messages & Infraction system
The official messaging & infraction system may be used by members of the moderating team as a way of keeping a record of any members who have been contacted for various reasons, including those who persist in breaking our forum rules.

Official conduct or behaviour messages will be issued to members who persist in more serious abuse of our forum rules or netiquette.

?OM1: 1st serious abuse of forum rules - official behaviour message.
?OM2: 2nd serious abuse of forum rules - official warning plus userban from the forum boards for 2 weeks.
?OM3: 3rd serious abuse of forum rules - a final official warning and a month userban from the boards.
?Permanent ban: 4th serious abuse of forum rules - permanent ban from our forum boards.

We also have a Timeout OM which may be used at the discretion of the moderating team. The Timeout OM is a 2 day ban from our forum boards which may be used in addition to, or in the place of the OMs listed above.

Members should not use their profile to draw attention to any official messages or infractions they have received on our forums, nor should they post messages which draw attention or discuss any official messages or infractions they may have received. Any such posts/threads will be edited/deleted by moderators without warning

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Regards

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is it ok to link it ?

I guess so (just didn't want to fuel the twattery)

ok here

I think that thread clearly demonstrates that nobody in authority at NM has the will to even begin addressing the issues you've raised.

Not only are the happy to allow the status quo to remain, but they are actively obstructing any and all suggestions about how matters could be improved.

It wasn't other posters arguing that disabilist terms were acceptable - it was the fucking moderator .

nickelbabe I can't even recall why I signed up in the first place. Chances are it was a thread similar to this though...

Last bit is a bit rich... the mail itself looks pretty gereric though. Well if they want to look like dicks for allowing abuse they've done a good job

You go, Mrs De Vere!

I think you should feel damned proud if Netmums bans you!

AF that site is wanktastic. I spy an ex-MNer on there too.

wanktastic indeed

Naming individual MN posters way out of order

Start a wind up thread and get yourself banned just to piss them off. I would.

Netmums is so bloody boring, I blame all their stupid rules.

"disablist"?

Did you make that up?

The sucks site seems to be full of men taking the piss out of a load of strong women....

Pendeen 'disablist' is a credible word.

i.e they wish MN sucked iyswim

So hate speech against vulnerable groups is perfectly OK, but swearing is a banning offense? And also an offense to take polite exception to the hate speech? Classy stuff.

You're much better off without them, of course, MrsDeVere, but they are really shooting themselves in the foot to tolerate language that targets the disabled ... it's unbelievable, actually, the more I think about it the more I am . I have heard all the stuff about Netmums being crap but I didn't think they would officially allow that.

How is it not a terrible stain on their reputation, that they don't pull people up on this stuff? Really surprises me, especially when there are loads of articles all the time criticising Mumsnet for being rude and nasty ... I never see the like about NM.

I got pulled up by swearing on a thread earlier today, actually. I wasn't even swearing at anyone. Wonder if that poster was more accustomed to Netmums rules.

That FB page only has 28 likes - not exactly popular .

Hi Mrs DV - I have just 'reported' Leanne the moderator's post on NM - the one that says "some areas of the country use Mong as a common term for 'chilling' or 'relaxing'"

I have asked them to remove it as I find it offensive. I wonder if they will.