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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to judge this person as being a total lunatic kn*bhead?

20 replies

MirandaGoshawk · 07/08/2011 21:25

There is a motorbike goes past our house in the early hours at weekends (between about 1 - 2am) at Shock mph. It's a very quiet road at that time of night, but even so, it's still a 30mph limit.

It turns out that this is the father of DD's friend "Chloe" (nhrn). She lives with her mum up the road, parents are separated and the dad lives a few miles further on. So when DD sees Chloe it's usually at Mum's house, but DD has just told me that the other day the mum dropped them off at Dad's and when he dropped them back (by car) he reached 190 mph. Now I'm assuming she means kilometres, so around 130mph IIRC. (190mph? Is it a Maserati?) Or if it was 120, 110 mph - even so - Shock

Anyway, after I'd given her the "ring me/dangerous/illegal" speech she laughed & said it was fine because he told them a) he only does this on the dual carriageway, and b) car is an automatic. So that's all right then. Angry

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picnicbasketcase · 07/08/2011 21:28

I'd go with your definition, yes. Bloody idiot. Hope he gets reported or caught by speed trap /cameras very soon.

onehellofaride · 07/08/2011 21:30

how does the mum know the speed he was driving?

lazarusb · 07/08/2011 21:30

I would be phoning the Police with his registration number if I were you. Before he kills someone.

MissPenteuth · 07/08/2011 21:35

He's doing 120mph with your DD in the car? YANBU. Irresponsible prick. I wouldn't let the mum laugh off your concerns, and I'd be hesitant to let DD visit again if both parents are so blasé about it.

Driving alone at that speed is bad enough, if you crashed into another car you'd most likely kill everyone in it. Driving with a child in the car is reprehensible, and driving with someone else's child in the car is downright abhorrent.

Gymbob · 07/08/2011 21:37

There is also an idiot lives down our street that drives like a nutter whether he's on his motorbike, in his car or his works van. The motorbike is obv the worst, he likes to go from the top to the bottom of the street preferably in just the one gear so it's screeching its head off. Sometimes he throws the odd wheelie in for good measure.

It drives DH to distraction, as it's so mindless. Like you Miranda, ours is a very quiet road, in fact a cul-de-sac, so it's all the more noticeable.

If the dad of Chloe's daughter is driving like that with your DD in the car, then that is totally irresponsible. I presume that Chloe's mum thinks it's okay? I would have to at least speak to Chloe's mum about the speed he drives your DD about and ask her to tell her ex to slow down. He's bang out of order.

My DD wouldn't be getting in the car with a nutter like that.

create · 07/08/2011 21:37

Does your DD know they did 190, or was Dad "joking" and winding up a couple of giggling girls? That's what my Dad would have done.

Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 07/08/2011 22:24

Bit of misunderstanding going on here, I don't know if the mum knows or not. It was DD who told me. As for the winding up of the girls, they are 17 and DD is a driver herself. She must know that they were going very fast. The fact that it's him who is the nutter on the bike makes me think that he was trying to impress them by going at stupidmph.

It's a good idea about having a word with the mum. I don't see her often or know her very well, so will be an awkward convo. Mind you, she lost her licence for either 6 or 9 months last year (can't remember which) for drink driving, but this is no doubt in a different league. I am so angry I could spit.

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Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 07/08/2011 22:31

I have told DD she is not to get into that car again.

I don't know how I would get his licence number. Certainly, wrt the bike, he'd be in the next county before I could get out of the door. But my neighbour is campaigning for traffic calming here & the police are supposed to be coming to monitor speeds.

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piratecat · 07/08/2011 22:35

do you know his name at least, and where he lives.

Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 07/08/2011 22:43

I know where he lives. Before they separated it was Chloe's home & DD used to go to play there. She was a lot younger then & it was after school, before he came home from work. I only met him once. I went to collect her & he ignored me, seemed to be a miserable grumpy sod. (Sorry, am judging based only on one meeting. Most un-MN Hmm) Then his wife left him.

But I don't know his name. Could find out. What good is that?

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ScaredyDog · 07/08/2011 22:52

Was your DD not outraged to be carried in a car like that? I'd have screamed blue murder being driven in a car like that and I would have know it was very wrong at the age of seven, let alone at 17.

gallicgirl · 07/08/2011 23:10

Think I'd be worrying a bit about your daughter's driving if she thinks it's ok to go so fast and why on earth does she think the car being an automatic would make it any safer?

Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 08/08/2011 21:57
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Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 08/08/2011 21:58

Actually, Scaredy I think she knew it was wrong & that's why she told me, to see what I'd say.

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MadamDeathstare · 08/08/2011 22:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 08/08/2011 22:22

MDS I can't bear to think about what could happen. To his gorgeous DD apart from anything else. Many of us will have seen the aftermath of a nasty accident. Makes you go cold. It's almost as if there's some sort of 'safety/survival gene' missing when someone takes risks like this.

When I said he is experienced, I mean from my DD's POV, so therefore must know what he's doing/saying.

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MadamDeathstare · 08/08/2011 23:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SaffronCake · 08/08/2011 23:31

I'm a biker. I ride sports bikes, so do most of my biking friends. There is an unspoken code of conduct and a few generally accepted truths about speed among those who are partial to a little rapidity. It goes a bit like this... 20's, 30's and 40 limits are to be given 100% respect, even when the car behind is pushing you to do 5mph over, because they are there for pedestrian safety. 50's should be treated as advisory, they are also only used where there are concerns about safety, although they will be "open road" rather than built up, and so you've only really got any opportunities to go at all in a national speed limit. Anything over 99mph is usually an instant loss of licence so you seriously need to think about that. "It's an automatic" or a similar bike equivalent like "it's built to do it" roughly translates as "I haven't got a clue about skills training because I've never taken any so I'll pass all responsibility for my decisions to the factory in Tokyo". Speed is an individual choice to break the law so you face the consequences yourself, you do not inflict them on passengers who can't vote with thier feet. Lastly no one, and I do mean NO ONE approves of a twat, it makes everything harder for everyone.

So what I hope that makes clearer is... Even his own kind (I use the term extremly losely) think he's a dickhead who needs taking off the road. You'd be hard pressed to find anyone who thinks he's big and clever, or even just competant. I don't know any biker who would take his side at all.

biddysmama · 09/08/2011 12:03

^my family are bikers and i agree with this^

Original poster
MirandaGoshawk · 09/08/2011 17:09

Thanks, SC. I have also been out with a couple of bikers (many moons ago!) and I wouldn't put him in that category, i.e. from my experience people who enjoy bikes & help each other.

He is just someone who is a twat generally, so I've heard, who happens to use a bike.

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