aibu to insist that ex hubby's new gf meet up with me?

[philherup]

they have been together for ten months though i only just found out about it a week or so ago he wants to introduce her to the kids as per our agreement in mediation he said he would inform me before it happened out of "courtesy" so he did and the kids came back rambling about how much fun they had with her and her kids etc.
i want to meet her, and asked her to text me so we could me up but she refused. so i asked for her number so i could contact her. again she refused saying that she would be happy meet up at the drop up for kids but she was not willing to meet up with me on her own for coffee etc.
i want to meet her so that i do not have the humiliation of bumping in to her at the park or something and want to get to know the person who will be seeing MY CHILDREN.
i have now insisted saying this is my bottom line that i do not want my ex to be there or the children there as this would be too difficult for me. she apparently says that meeting me for coffee would be a forced environment and would be awkward for her too. my wishes as their mother are more important as is my piece of mind right?
do i have a leg to stand on legally to say she cant see the kids?

And then what, what if you don't approve the answer is its tuff o be honest I wouldn't brother it will just give you more reasons not to like her their won't be anything she has to say that you will like

As long as the kids don't have a problem and she hen been to jail then its none of your bees wax

Dear OP, I do sympathise with you, but you don't need to meet this new girlfriend, everything that needs to be communicated, between you and her can be done via ex.
Also sounds to me you still have feelings for him, and you find it very painful to let go, but that's another subject altogether.
Happiness of your children it's all that meters now, and I am sure she will do the right thing by your children, for the man she loves, as far SN DC goes I am sure she is aware of it and all the special care that DC needs will be provided under supervision of your ex.
Forgive me, but you do sound heartbroken, don't let ex's new relationship consume you

Sorry but from your posts it comes across like you want to summon her and have her feel like she's on trial before you, a way of showing everyone who is boss and what their place is in the hierarchy.

Zombie. Reported.

Kids are probably adults now