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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to consider going out to buy a dummy for the little monkey?

21 replies

bagelmonkey · 03/08/2011 15:34

the only things that are stopping me from going out right now are 1) the fact that MIL is pro-'dodo' and wanted to give DD a dummy from the start, (for constant use, not even just for soothing) (I was a little bit anti-, but MIL attitude made me v anti) 2) DD is finally napping on my tit so it would wake her up.
I can't do anything else to get her to nap for longer than 15mins anymore. I'm desperate! Will it work?
How do you introduce a dummy for naps in a 6mo?

OP posts:

InFlames · 03/08/2011 15:37

Might work ... Might not. DS had 1 at 5 weeks ish - only has it for bedtime now, at 7 months .... Figure some babies are 'sucky' and some aren't - DS was sucking thumb at 20 week scab and I'd so from day 1! Good luck!

Mitmoo · 03/08/2011 15:38

Mine had one from two weeks so don't know if it is any different. My method was cry - shove it in - breathe out.

I was very ill and exhausted, so threw all of my premummy ideas out of the window when reality hit.

Kytti · 03/08/2011 15:39

I never wanted to use dummies, but then one day while my dd was wailing I stuck one in her mouth and the peace was blissful. I have always managed to (luckily, I think, seeing other children) wean them off them by age three.

Personally, I love them and they have bought me hours of blissful quiet, happy, children. The only pain is when they lose them in bed and you have to go find one at two in the morning. Great when they're unhappy, I try to keep them off it as a general rule, but offer it for sleeping and general grumpiness.

Good luck! It's your choice, and use them as you see fit.

tabulahrasa · 03/08/2011 15:42

Mine both had dummies, they don't help them sleep longer at all. They're good for soothing and getting them to drop off in the first place - but it won't keep her asleep longer.

pjmama · 03/08/2011 15:45

A dummy isn't going to do any harm. I'm a firm believer in 'whatever works' and soon ditched many pre-baby opinions when I actually had a real one to look after! It might work like a charm or could just be summarily rejected, like it was by both of my twins! A dummy to pacify one while i dealt with the other would have been marvellous, but they had other ideas. Both breastfed btw so not sure if that had any bearing on why they wouldn't take a dummy.

Give it a go. If it works, great. If not, you've lost nothing.

niccibabe · 03/08/2011 15:48

You can always try it, and if DD doesn't like it, you don't have to mention it to MIL.

If DD is soothed by you letting her suck on your finger, then she may take to it well. My DC got a dummy at about 5 weeks because our fingers were being digested. Used the dummy for settling to sleep at night and in the car then DC refused it from 10mo. It was good while it lasted.

DC only liked the MAM dummies - the ones that are fairly flat, DN only liked the Avent ones which are much rounder - maybe worth getting a couple of types to try?

hophophippidtyhop · 03/08/2011 15:54

DD1 had a dummy, dd2 (1) didn't want to know. Bf both of them, now I'm hoping to cut out the night feeding back to sleep, I'm wondering how the hell to do it. With dd1 I just gave the dummy instead, I can't see it going as smoothly with dd2. No harm in trying, she'll either want it or not, and you can be in control of when she has it -works quite well for just sleeps and settling at night.

Roo83 · 03/08/2011 16:00

YANBU to consider anything to get 5 mins peace! You may find it's not the magic solution as by 6mo the need to suck isn't necessarily as strong as in a newborn. It may work though, and if not it's something to tick off your list of things you've tried anyway

Original poster

bagelmonkey · 03/08/2011 18:14

I think the love bite on my shoulder proves that she still has an urge to suck, so I'll give it a go.
It's so frustrating because I'd broken her BFing to sleep habit and she was napping so well 2 weeks ago. Anyway, desperate times.....

OP posts:

Catslikehats · 03/08/2011 18:25

I was terribly anti dummy prior to DC4 but after my fingers and nipples were sucked into oblivion I tried a dummy.

She's 5mths and if left to her own devices will never latch off my breast. If I break the latch she wakes or cries if already awake. At night I BF in bed and have woken up in the morning to "love bites" on other parts of my breast where she just sucks.

The dummy is a godsend I pop it in and she sleeps. I am amazed that she can keep it in for 5 hour stretches....actually I'm a bit worried about how on earth I'm going to wean her off it.

And to think that after her birth the paed wanted to readmit her because she couldn't find a suck reflex!

unpa1dcar3r · 03/08/2011 18:38

Don't buy A dummy, buy shares in dummies. An absolute Godsend. My eldest refused one but soon found her thumb which she then sucked til aged 11 and then had teeth which made her look like the one with the big mouth in wallace n Grommit
(you can take a dummy away but sadly not a thumb although I did try on numerous occasions and also put a strait jacket on her once or twice)

Mandy2003 · 03/08/2011 18:40

Mine did not take one till 7 months, but try it!

MAM dummies were the favourite - he wouldn't take the ones with a round teat. Beautiful jewel colours and matching straps for when they're older too. Ended up at the age of 3 regularly having 8 in his mouth at one time - but he's just odd

spudulika · 03/08/2011 18:46

Dummies are fine.

Except if your child also has their ears pierced/head shaved, and if a girl baby is also dressed top to toe in pink nylon frills with a matching headband. Or you hold the dummy in with a long, fake fingernail while your child is trying to spit it out and tell you something .

Try stroking her cheek gently or tapping the dummy gently when you first put it in her mouth. Often encourages them to suck and keep it in.

Zimm · 03/08/2011 18:55

I think fine for naps/sleep but horrendous in public. They effectively silence children who are trying to vocalise something. Just my view - good luck, those shorts naps are evil - mine will now at one year sometimes to do over an hour after months of 30 minutes naps....

Mitmoo · 03/08/2011 18:57

I think fine for naps/sleep but horrendous in public. They effectively silence children who are trying to vocalise something.

You mean like a scream?

Catslikehats · 03/08/2011 19:10

zimm I used to think that but now believe some babies are just very sucky. If DD doesn't have a dummy she will shove her clothes/blanket into her mouth, she'll even turn over and suck the floor!

FabbyChic · 03/08/2011 19:11

At six months she is really too old to start her on a dummy, both mine had them from birth, my youngest though never took to it, but did take to his bottle which he carried everywhere until he was three.

4madboys · 03/08/2011 19:12

yep try the dummy!

my first four didnt have one, tho ds4 sucks his thumb.

dd was/is a sucky baby and has a dummy, generally just for naps/night time, she is almost 8mths and its great, i swaddle her, stick in the dummy and she sleeps!

MrsBloomingTroll · 03/08/2011 19:15

Do whatever works for you and sod MIL and her opinions. My MIL has the opposite opinion (dummies are evil) and so I struggled on without one for DD1 and became a human dummy. MIL then wondered why we wouldn't leave DD with her for babysitting...err, because she'll scream the place down if she doesn't have my boob in her mouth!

Being a human dummy is miserable, IME. Nice at first to feel you're soothing your baby, but then resentment sets in and it also renders your OH helpless to soothe the baby.

DC2 imminent and the dummies (two different types) are in the steriliser and ready to roll.

MrsSnaplegs · 03/08/2011 19:18

We were both anti dummy and dd didn't have one but ds has had one now for a couple of months, discovered by accident when he was unwell and I used his temperature dummy, he was asleep in seconds. Took me a couple of days to admit to DH that I had succumbed he only uses it for sleep and general grumpiness when tired
I definitely second the vote for MAM dummies, the orthodontic ones seem to suit ds best.
It's a godsend tonight as he is breaking his first tooth

Mandy2003 · 03/08/2011 19:55

I was always amazed at how clearly DS could speak with a dummy in.

Yes, he did end up having to have orthodontic treatment, but the reason for that was having a narrow mouth with not enough room for his teeth - just like his parents (who didn't have dummies but did have braces!)

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