AIBU to have a friendship with a guy that I know my OH would not approve of??

[Shell85]

my other half is in the army, and is away for long periods of time with practically no contact. A lot of the time I feel like a single parent, and most of the time I feel like a single woman.

To help with the loneliness I joined a forum for people who are in/or have friends or family in the military.
It had been a huge help and great support and I have made a few good friends.
One of those friends is a guy who is in the RAF.
He is lovely, and we have a lot in common.
We exchanged phone numbers and have been texting and chatting on the phone.
We text each other daily and have developed a really good friendship.
He is based on a camp about an hour and a half away from where I live and we have arranged to meet up and have a night out together.

I don't intend to sleep with this guy or anything, I would never cheat on my DH.

I know my DH would not approve of this friendship, but I don't really care.

When we first got married my DH promised he would look for a training job so that we could be together and raise a family, but that never happened.
He loves he job, and has no intentions of giving it up any time soon.

Do you think I am wrong to be friends with this guy behind my DH back?

I am not lying to DH or anything, I have not spoken to him since I became friends with the RAF guy, but if I had I would have told him about my new friend.
But I still know how he would react to the friendship.

I think you are trying Way too hard to justify this.
If it was as innocent as you say it is you wouldn't be here asking for opinions.
This sound to me very much like an EA.

Yes it's quite possible to have a purely platonic relationship with a male as others have said, but these are people who's partners are in total agreement.

You are continuing this relationship in secret knowing DH wouldn't approve and that in itself is the road to destruction. Being deceiptful is not a good thing in any relationship.

How would you feel if you found out that your DH was in a close friendship with another woman, texting and chatting every day and going out and spending time with her???

But i dont suppose he is in the postion to do this so you have nothing to worry about. But If he did......

You have already decided that you are doing nothing wrong, so if thats the case then, "Good Luck to you."

I think you have the right to be friends with whoever you want, even if DH doesn't like it - because if it's truly platonic then surely he should trust you?

But this is a slightly different situation because you aren't giving him the chance to trust you by not telling him about the friendship - it's lying by omission. If it's truly not a big deal, tell him and get it out in the open.

Secondly, I'm a bit about how this guy ended up on a forum for supporters of the armed forces... Sounds a bit suspicious - surely if he's in the RAF he'd be away as much as your DH and not have time to be texting/calling you all the time?

Err not a good idea. This never ends well.

I don't understand why you joined a group for people who are related to those in the army to hook up with someone in the raf.

if you're lonely you should be hanging out with the other wives or husbands left behind... this relationship wont be different- and yes, you are looking for a romantic relationship, or the fact that you feel like a single woman wouyldn't be relevant

could you find another female friend on the same website to go for a night out with?