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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that the world (or at least MN) is divided into those who think that life if a constant battle and if you aren't striving and fighting you might as well be dead, and those who think that as

125 replies

Ormirian · 22/07/2011 20:46

it goes life is pretty OK and mostly things are fine and perfectly acceptable and by and large most people are quite nice?

Because I am the latter.

And I think that too many people are the former.

I don't know how they do it. They are tiring just to watch.

I could give you two examples from my own friends but it's too much effort to type it up. They seem to be afraid that if they stop paddling for two second together they will sink.

Which side are you on? A paddler or a floater (so to speak? Grin)

OP posts:
Mammster · 22/07/2011 21:01

I thought a floater was a big shit you can't flush! Yeah, I'm defo one of them.

sleepindogz · 22/07/2011 21:02

paddlers make ripples for their own boats :)

dunno if that makes sense, i am on the fourth glass

Wine
peeriebear · 22/07/2011 21:03

I'm a lotus eating floater. Paddling really grates my cheese, harshes my buzz, grips my dong.

MissBetsyTrotwood · 22/07/2011 21:09

The problem with episodic floating is the guilt one feels afterwards. But I suppose this is only in the context of paddling for the sake of it, not to keep your head above water!

Feeling a bit floatier and benign now for a Wine and a thieved cake off DS2's party spread for tomorrow. Ahhh.

MissBetsyTrotwood · 22/07/2011 21:12

'...grips my dong.'

I am going to say that tomorrow. Somehow. Probably to my grandma.

Original poster
Ormirian · 22/07/2011 21:13

I never used to feel guilty about being a floater because I didn;t think I was. I thought I was normal. Until I encounted true paddlers and realised that I was totally marooned!

OP posts:
2littlegreenmonkeys · 22/07/2011 21:14

Floater here Grin DH is a king floater but is successful in all he does without seeming to try Envy
I could do with paddling occasionally, I could achieve much more in life, BUT I am happy with my life as it is Smile

MissBetsyTrotwood · 22/07/2011 21:19

Just enjoy being marooned then. You never know when you will have to do a bit of true paddling!

Cocoflower · 22/07/2011 21:21

Paddler I suppose!

smallwhitecat · 22/07/2011 21:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

notevenamousie · 22/07/2011 21:34

I have recently realised that I am a paddler and the drama is mostly of my own making - feels scary to admit that. But I am admitting it and making changes so that's got to be a positive thing. One can paddle serenely I think - there's still a lot to do, but it doesn't have to be such a drama.

DoMeDon · 22/07/2011 21:38

well done mousie - one less drama queen is a start. i mean that as i am a recovering queen myself Smile

Laquitar · 22/07/2011 21:50

I am a floater now.
I was a paddler when younger.

But i don't imply that all floaters are old Wink

Ripeberry · 22/07/2011 21:52

Floater on the surface and mad paddler under the surface Grin

DontCallMePeanut · 22/07/2011 21:57

I'm a paddler... But hey...

Some of us go through more shit than others.

I also have my ambitions, that won't be achieved if I simply float. So I paddle like crazy, then take a short breather to float when I feel safe to do so.

PelvicFloorOfSteel · 22/07/2011 22:01

I'm a floater.

I think we need some more subcategories for paddlers:

Constant purposeful rowing = Going to uni, career progression, etc.
I could do with a bit more of this.

Waving the oars about and splashing a lot with no forward momentum = Constantly creating pointless drama, picking unsuitable men, having crises, etc.
I find people like this very tiring.

working9while5 · 22/07/2011 22:06

Paddle at work, float at home

hazeyjane · 22/07/2011 22:06

I used to be a floater, and loved bobbing about, but last year my legs started paddling frantically, and they just don't seem to stop, what ever I do, I hate it.

EverythingInMiniature · 22/07/2011 22:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2shoes · 22/07/2011 22:09

paddler. in my world you have to be, if you turn your back for a second some bastard will drown you

worraliberty · 22/07/2011 22:10

I think some people make their own battles in life. You know the sort who start threads saying something like "A shop assistant smiled at me today, AIBU to complain?"

It must be so tiring to constantly take offence/read things into innocent remarks and looks all the time.

It wears me out just thinking about it!

DontCallMePeanut · 22/07/2011 22:17

I'm mainly a purposeful paddler, then Grin but occassionally have a flap, too. Everyone does

Original poster
Ormirian · 22/07/2011 22:20

I think the desperate attempt to paddle when I am by nature a floater was what contributed to my depression over the years. Being instead of doing is quite therapeutic.

OP posts:
lorelilee · 22/07/2011 22:22

Life is a film, and you are the Director. It's entirely up to you whether you win an Oscar on end up on the cutting room floor.

NorksAreMessy · 22/07/2011 22:25

I am a deeply committed Floater, drifter, enjoyer and smeller of roses.
I work really really hard at two jobs, but I still am not ambitious, pushy, stressed or determined in any way. No idea why not.

Perhaps it is a blessing to enjoy what is here and now, rather than to be striving for the thing I don't have. I think it is a blessing, anyway.

I am also a PollyAnna-ish optimist and have a generally sunny view of life.
Can you be a pessimistic floater?