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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think Rachel should have gone to Paris?

113 replies

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 13:08

I watched (for the hundredth time) the last episode of Friends last night, and once again thought how unfair it was that Rachel gave up on her dream job in Paris to stay with needy Ross.

I would be interested to hear what feminists make of it but I'm too scared to post on there.

What do you think, was she right to stay or should she have gone to Paris?

OP posts:

Original poster

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 13:51

I will second your HELL NO.

Despite him doing this he continued to act the martyr for the rest of their relationship/friendship, when it was Rachel who was actually wronged.

OP posts:

GetOrfMoiLand · 12/07/2011 13:52

You could have put this in feminism OP - there have been a few threads in there looking at friends from a feminist perspective!

I love and adore Friends but the downside of having eatched each episode at least 10 times and still wtaching it whenever it is on telly now (why? god knows ) is that you pick the episodes to pieces.

I think Rachel NO WAY ON EARTH would have got a job with Louis Vuitton as she didn't speak French. But as long as we suspend that disbelief I would have gone to Paris like a shot. GOD Ross is the most controlling, insecure and passive aggressive (MN buzz word)) tosser. You would run a mile.

She should have realised that she was passionately in love with Gunther in the last episode

HarrietJones · 12/07/2011 13:52

There was a thread on Ross not long ago, in feminist? I think it expanded on to various programmes. I don't watch friends in the same way now though!

CrapolaDeVille · 12/07/2011 13:53

Gunther.....awful actor, unbelievable character and weird.

Original poster

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 13:53

ooh any chance of a link? Im on my phone so cant navigate to other topics easily.

OP posts:

NarcissaMalfoy · 12/07/2011 13:54

Is it the nineties again? [hgrin]

Original poster

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 13:56

Narcissa

What can i say, I'm feeling retro. I may dig out my Global Hypercolour colour change t-shirt from the loft and indulge in a Calypso in a minute.

OP posts:

CrapolaDeVille · 12/07/2011 13:57

I'm going to put up my Marilyn Monroe posters and put on my Stephanelle ~(sp) orange t shirt dress with yellow jacket.;

crazygracieuk · 12/07/2011 13:58

Geek alert!!! If I recall correctly, Ross made a big deal about having to stay in NY when Emily asked him to relocate to London but I don't remember him mentioning it when Rachel was going to move to Paris.

KaraToytown · 12/07/2011 13:58

No no no to copy shop girl.

You can't just shit all over a long term relationship by shagging a stranger hours after you 'broke up'.

If he had admitted he was wrong and it was a drunken mistake but it was his complete belief that it was someway acceptable because 'they were on a break'.

GetOrfMoiLand · 12/07/2011 14:03

Oh yes we need Showy on this thread.

Btw, at the end of Sex and the City, Carrie should NOT have got together with Big. The end should have been her walking down the streets of NY happily, proudly and triumphantly single.

Original poster

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 14:03

It was played as if he was justified in sleeping with the copy place girl because he thought that Rachel had/was going to sleep with Mark (her colleague) who was in the apartment when Ross rang to make up. But no excuse to sleep with someone else and cheat on the supposed love of your life.

OP posts:

Annunziata · 12/07/2011 14:03

I don't think she should have gone purely because of the baby but they didn't seem to care much about taking a child several hours on a plane away from its father.

I always thought Ross was really controlling- the whole Mark jealousy thing, "just" a waitress, copy shop girl etc etc.

Although Monica never went to Tulsa!

takethisonehereforastart · 12/07/2011 14:03

She should have gone to Paris because the Ross character went from being a nice, normal man in the early series to a bit of a needy nutcase by the last ever show. She could have then met Aleksander Petrovski from Sex and the City in Paris and been happy with him instead.

Also, and totally off the topic, when they went to Barbados for Ross's keynote speach they all had adjoining rooms with Monica and Chandler in the middle (so they could listen to Ross and Charlie and Rachel and Joey through the walls).

And when it showed you Ross and Charlie's room there was no door in the wall behind the bed and a window in the wall next to it. But when Ross went into Monica and Chandler's room there was a door on their side and a corridor visible through it WHICH COULD NOT HAVE BEEN THERE BECAUSE OF ROSS'S WINDOW AND THE ABSENCE OF A DOOR IN THAT WALL OF HIS ROOM!

Drives me mad every time that episode is shown. Partly because it's shown about 50 times a week and it's the only one I ever seem to see.

But come on continuity people, get it right.

(Yes I have too much time on my hands).

GetOrfMoiLand · 12/07/2011 14:05

Yes that was a good thread harriet, god knows what it was called ot how to search for it effectively though.

They were NOT ON A BREAK. They were in a loving and committed relationship and had a row, he had NO RIGHT to go and shag the copy girl. I am sure it said that in the letter, all 14 pages FRONT AND BACK.

TheOriginalFAB · 12/07/2011 14:05

I don't think she gave her job up for Ross and he wasn't needy. He loved her. It was right that they ended up together.

MsAnnThroppy · 12/07/2011 14:05

The copy shop girl shag wasn't even the worst bit. It was the complete attempt to undermine Rachel in her workplace and implication she was unable to work with an attractive male co-worker without inevitably shagging him. He did not treat her career as important and in need of her time and attention. He thought nothing of making her look a fool at work. He had no trust in her abilities to be faithful. He proved what a hypocritical shit he was when he fucked someone else straight after their breakup and expected forgiveness. Misogyny and mistrust, a delightful combination in a man.

LaWeasleyAintWeaselyAnymore · 12/07/2011 14:08

Ross is a bit of a controlling twunt isn't he? (Never though about i tbefore!)

I still think unless there is an abuse type situation (and much as Ross was a twat, I don't think he was abusive or any obvious risk to Emma) it is not on for either parent to permanently move extremely far from the other and make things difficult for the DC.

Malcontentinthemiddle · 12/07/2011 14:08

Ignoring the character of Ross himself, I did always think it was wrong that she was basically saying 'I'm taking your kid and fucking off', but I also thought it was wrong that Ross's response was only sadness at losing Rachel, and never the loss of his child.

KaraToytown · 12/07/2011 14:13

Round of applause for MsAnn. That's what I wanted to say too.

FoofusScrimgeour · 12/07/2011 14:13

Friends of ours split up and the Mum took DD to live across the world. She got married had another child. Father went out there for about 2 yrs but had to come back once visa expired. Child went into meltdown without her Daddy. They subsequently live back in UK now.

So LaWeasley completely agree.

Original poster

Aworryingtrend · 12/07/2011 14:14

Excellent Ross analysis from MsAnn

OP posts:

KaraToytown · 12/07/2011 14:15

I love this thread.

If I'd had internet in the 1990s I would never have left the house! In fact the first web search I ever did in my life was for Friends.

GetOrfMoiLand · 12/07/2011 14:16

I don't think Ross loved Rachel, he just wanted her where he could keep control of her.

JanMorrow · 12/07/2011 14:18

NYC BABY. That's my imput into this thread.

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