Ear Piercing - What age is ok?

[WannabeNigella]

My friend is letting her DD have her ears pierced for her 5th birthday. I know it is none of my business but I wanted to plead with her not to.

My DD is just 3 and there is no way she will be having ears pierced till at least 12 or 13 the way I feel about it at the moment, preferably 16!

AIBU? What is an acceptable age? I just think that it looks so chavvy when they are young and it's so unnecessary too.

I agree with Brian. My dd's ears have been left scared. Doesnt look nice at all. It wasnt very nice either when she was screaming in agony whilst 3 seperate doctors tried to remove them with surgical instruments. There was so much blood it was running down her back.

I'd prefer to leave it until secondary school, though I had it done when I was ten - mum gave in after nagging her for three years! She'd previously said I'd have to wait until I was 14 which seemed eons away. Given I looked two years older anyway it probably didn't look too bad.

It is a personal thing though. Personally I'd like them to be an age where they were mature enough to take care of their ears and do all the cleaning required.

They also take a lot longer than six weeks to heal. So no pe for weeks then they have to be able to remove them themselves as the teachers are not allowed to

I said NO to dd every time she asked[up to 16].She then stopped asking and if she'd had it done I'd not have said much.She never did though and she is 36 now[soon 37].I never had it done either.However my Turkish granddaughter had hers pierced at 6 because she was the only little girl in the class who hadnt and she cried about it so her parents gave in.

strickly speaking that means no PE, games or swimming until you can take them out. And the children never remember to bring micropore tape to cover them if the school permits that

The one time DD forgot tape she just borrowed it from a classmate (most her peers had pierced ears around 7-9yo). I did ask the school specifically if earrings would be a problem with PE and was told very specifically it would not as long as she had the right tape (finding the right tape was another problem).

School DID NOT tell me about the swimming problem, though, or I would have waited until summer holidays (sigh).

DD had it done at 9yo & insists it did not hurt in the slightest.

Personally I don't care what age others have it done; I do find use of the word Chav quite irritating, though.

I'll say it again, you can't defend things like this under the banner of 'it's cultural'. Female circumcision and foot binding are also 'cultural' practices. Does that mean they're okay?

We couldnt put tape over ours, They were either removed or no PE.

Dd had it done at nine, the last in her year. We did it at the beginning of the holidays as she needs to have them out for pe.

Everything is fine now, a year on but i do wish we'd waited. I'm not exaggerating when I say it would take an hour every weds morning to get them out, an hour of dd been hysterical and screaming. This lasted till about nov. I threatened several times to not put them back in again. The same screaming every eve to get them back in.

She's ok now and changes them herself, no problems.

Summer hols before senior school IMO. They're old enough to look after them, or learn a hard lesson if they don't.

I wasn't allowed to get mine done until 16, so I went mad with peircings and tattoos when I was old enough.

You're all missing the point. The important question is not when you have your ears pierced but what you put in them afterwards, and the only acceptable answer is: expensive but tasteful. So nothing ghastly from Claire's Accessories thank you very much.

Stands up and applauds TidyDancer - exactly!

Yearning - that's strange, as I said up there ^^ none of my dd's classmates have (all 6 years old-ish). Maybe someone should do a study on different areas of the country and whether its more 'ok' in some than others? I;m in the Midlands.

My DD is almost 10 and she is now really keen to have her ears pierced this summer holiday. Her mum's already said "yes" but I'm wavering.

On the one hand, she's sensible enough to be able to look after them and she seems clear about the upsides and downsides.

On the other, I think she's a bit young for them but I don't have any solid reasons or even a clear idea of when she would be old enough.

DD is probably the last girl in her ethnically/culturally mixed class of 8-9 yr olds not to have pierced ears, most of them had them pierced years ago. No rules about taking them out for PE but only small plain studs are allowed.

My DD had them done (years ago) for her 10th birthday - under the stricty instruction that she cared for them properly which she did. Most girls had their ears done at this time in her class (very white middle class catholic school, so not much cultural mix). They were only allowed small studs at school of course which they could wear for games and swimming.

Viva - i often wonder where they get the 'only 6 weeks to heal' from.

My eldest dd's took months to heal to the point that they were not sticky. I got to the point where one of them never done pe for months. Then once i could get them out she would scream.

Loads of people have made the mistake of thinking they take 6 weeks to heal, getting them done at the start of the 6 weeks then missing pe for weeks. The majority of them end up letting them close up so its a waste of time anway. Once there out they wont let them put them back in.

Hence i got dd3 done at 2.5 so i wouldnt have to go through taking them out for pe at school. Bad move.

ive 3 dcs a dd who had hers done at 10 and two boys , were from a military background so i was surprised when my ds asked for his ear to be pierced i reluctantly agreed after 6 months of badgering whn he was 9 and he was good cleaning it ect.
I agreed because he had been asking so long and it wasnt because a friend had had it done he wasnt coppying anyone and after chatting to dh about it he said weel i dont personally like it but its good to allow individuality .
so I think 1, the dc should be old enough to keep it clean 2, have been the one wanting it done not the parent,
We also had it done at the begining of the school holiday and he didnt take it out for pe he just taped his earlobe up my sons took about 3 months till we could completely stop bathing them but its obviously a case of everyons body heals at a different rate,dont other schools alow you to tape them with micro pore tape all my local schools seem to?

No drive we have to remove them altogether or no PE. You cant even tape them up and sign a consent form

I was 5 and I loved having them pierced as later in life I got my needle phobia (see other thread) and would never have got them done otherwise lol.

Go Mum - good call

so sorry been at a carnival all day completely knackered and now seem to have lost the ability to type or spell

Eeep This is why I'm glad mine is a boy!

I love piercings and have had many myself over the years - starting with my ears at about 4 (I would only have 1 done as my Uncles ever-so-cool friend only had 1 done and I wanted to be like him) then eventually had both of them done when I was about 7, nose at 13, eyebrow 14, tongue 16 and lip 17. I have taken all but my ears out which wont heal anyway!

I agree that baby girls look awful with their ears pierced, I think that until they can make the decision to modify their own bodies then it shouldn't be done - I think this whole culture of nipping into Claires accessories and getting them done is disgusting - it shouldn't be taken lightly, it shouldn't be a decision other people should make for you either - As much as I love piercings and tattoes my DS will learn about his body first ... As for yr 6s with pierced belly buttons I think the piercer should be shot! They will end up with completely deformed piercings which will scar - That'll be just in time for their 16th birthday!

As for what age they can tell you they are ready - it depends on the child, but for me and mine it will be a minimum of 12 years for ears and then dependant on school regs probably 16 + for anything else.

Really interesting thread though - It just shows how diverse people are on here

DD was 6 , done by aunty without my consent (but that is a whole other thread altogether) Saying that I cannot remember having to clean anything, maybe I just have a terrible memory.

thats true chunkyits good were all different its all a matter of personal taste, I dont like children under 10 with earrings and deffinately not babies as i dont like how it looks and I believe its best there old enough to decide and look after them it could be 9 or 10 or 15 depends on the dc. but i dont look down on anyone who does different , vive la difference.

omg id go balistic if another relative had taken them at an earlier age to get it done gorionine