to think some parents just love to find fault in schools?

[CheeryCherry]

My first AIBU ...but I am just so fed up with parents forever finding fault with the schools/Heads/teachers/lessons. It gets rediculous when a family write to complain to the Head that they take their PFB (year 2) to a local castle so why should their PFB go on a school trip there? They kept him off school! [hshock] What's that all about?!

Cheery Have you ever changed your practice in good faith due to a parents request, and not begrudged it or taken it personally?

I have, several times. Often it has worked better, sometimes there has been no change.
Why should I take it personally if it's a request in good faith? It's orders I dislike.

Yes, I can see how 'orders' would grate, but there can be a difference sometimes, I think in how a request was given and how a request was received.

I honestly think that Teachers have a difficult time of it. Our culture isn't very teacher friendly. Every time we have an election the voters are encouraged to ask 'what are you going to DO about education?' so there as to follow some 'DOING' by whoever is elected in. It doesn't have to be positive, evidence-based or even sensible and teachers have to chase their tails learning how to fill in new types of forms, tolerate observations and criticism from those employed to ensure that new initiatives are embedded.

Voters want to know what the government is going to DO about education, because the government encourages the blame of all society's ills on schools and teachers to deflect from challenge to their policies. Youth crime is not a result of their parents being caught in the poverty trap due to shoddy policies, it is the fault of the teachers of course.

I am absolutely NOT surprised that teachers can be so defensive (and I'm sorry but really my experience is that they are). I can't imagine many can hold onto their self-esteem and self-confidence in such a climate and a parent requesting that they change something can probably seem like the last straw. They are probably the only stakeholder group that teachers have any control over in terms of demands made too and the weaker ones might need to put them in their place for their own sanity.

It's all a bit messy imo.

Well, I'm in a more specialised position in that I have a DS on the spectrum, so I've had to go into schools and ask for reasonable accommodations to take place to maximise his chances. Teachers have listened and altered things where possible. So how can I not do the same if possible without being a hypocrite?
Of course, some requests are PFB or daft, and the parents don't have good reasons or explanations for why the changes should happen, but others are perfectly reasonable.

Unfortunately sometimes you do get parents who will find fault with petty silly things who probably need to find better ways to spend their time. However speaking from personal experience there are some excellent teachers out there and also frankly (and I'm not sure if this is due to leadership at the top or for other reasons) but there are also some shocking ones and if I'm not happy with the ways things are going at school I will challenge in the right way. What I object to and I acknowledge this doesn't apply to all is the patronizing tone and implication that because they are the teacher they always know best and it almost gets their back up (again just personal opinion from a couple of situations) that you dare challenge. I've met some great teachers but it seems to be some schools seem to have an issue with weeding out the incompetent ones who probably would struggle to get a different job in the private sector .

My Dad, a Senior Lecturer at a teacher training college (after teaching for many years), told me that teachers can be sacked for just about anything except incompetence.

He also told me that he was regularly ORDERED to PASS shocking students who should never be allowed in a classroom, let along be responsible for one, for political and funding reasons.

Possibly the parent in the OP didn't want to shell out £10, £15 or whatever for their DC to go on a trip to a place he'd just visited??

I don't have an issue with my DS school's teaching.

I do however have a massive problem with the abysmal way I am communicated AT.

Our school organises, pretty much, the same events/trips for each year, every year. Yet we never, ever get told less than a week or so beforehand, and the voluntary 'contribution' is backed up with a reminder.

When we were given 3 working days notice of a payment of over £5 needed for someone to come in and present nursery rhymes I saw red. I am treated like a cash machine, not a parent. I'm not told when, where, how or why, all I get is Stump up. NOW. The majority of meaningful information comes from parents of older children who have been through the pain barrier and know what happens when.

We are constantly on the back foot, and made to feel disorganised, when we are not. As working parents, we need to have more notice, we need more information, we need to be involved.

I kept DS off from a trip last term. He's in reception. He doesn't need to be bussed down the motorway to see something he's already been to see, and wasn't that impressed by, and not if I have to pay for it without knowing ANY details of the trip at all. They can't supervise a playground properly, yet they expect me to just keep schtum, pay up and don't ask questions.

This poor communication would not be tolerated in business, why is it permissible in our school environment? Schools NEED our support, our money and involvement to keep going FGS, so why treat us like this?

I'm not asking for schools to suck up, but a bit of respect wouldn't go amiss.

I have only been a parent of a school aged child for a year, but I loathe every part of it. I really wish there was a school that treated parents like people, like the vital stakeholders they are rather than purely a funding stream.

I agree it gets ridiculous - I'm aware of a few parents who would complain about things where complaint really isn't warranted.

But there are also times where complaints really are warranted and there are a lot of parents like me who are reluctant to rock the boat, and only complain if absolutely necessary.

Part of the problem with our school is that they set standards which they communicate to parents and then don't reach them. E.g. we will provide a minimum of two reading books a week - then only provide one a fortnight. In these circumstances I think there is a lot that could be done to avoid the 30 complaints that arise from this.

HerHissyness - I am glad that the teaching is ok at your son's school. Their communication seems to be abysmal and that needs addressing. But if you are satisfied with the quality of their teaching, why on earth do you assume that your son doesn't need to go on a trip? The teachers will be using the trip to TEACH from. Perhaps it would have given him a new, worthwile perspective to a place that would have been meaningful to him. Then he could have joined in the follow up work that would have happened in the classroom.

This thread was about ridiculous complaints from parents, not justifiable ones.

2They kept him off school! shock What's that all about?!"

They would not be very hapy in our school then as children who are not going on school trip do not get a day off but join another class (I totally agree with this system BTW).

yearningforthesun the way your school is acting WRT asking for high payment at very short notice is appalling!

(Sorry for first pot typos too)

yearningforthesun those money situations sound appalling, not many schools would request a 'donation' of £50 for a party?!
HerHisseynessI understand that some pupils are likely to have been to the trip location before but as has been stated already, the teachers then use these visits as teaching material back in the classroom.
Surely if staff have to find places to visit where none of the pupils have ever been to, there would be a serious lack of school visits!

Oh yuck that brings back an awful memory of 'worksheets!'

Please tell me that schools not longer require children to complete 'worksheets' on school trips anymore?

Many a school trip was ruined by racing around trying to find answers in the quickest possible time to get the worksheet done, the worst task being to draw a picture of something, and meant that I had no time to spend on the things that I found interesting or wanted to ask questions about.

Janey and annoyingorgane "boring housewife syndrome", I don't get the joke and why should teachers get away with saying sexist comments like that.

The thing is that quite often, the parents do know more than the head teacher. The 'Outstanding' primary my children are currently at has terrible pastoral care.

They are so far up their own arses about how great the education is, they forget that mums might actually be a bit pee-ed off if their child sits in a playground in full hot sun for an afternoon without a hat or that parents of a child who is continually being hurt by another child, might actually be upset about it and want something doing other then the naughty child being told off by dinner lady.

So I do think YAB a bit U. Not all parents complain in writing because they have nothing better to do- it's because the welfare of their child is at stake.