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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to have the party plans dumped on me?

8 replies

Newmummytobe79 · 06/07/2011 14:38

I love my friend dearly and want her to have the best ever hen do ever but I'm currently 32 weeks pregnant, knackered with a full time job, have weekends full of prior commitments, whilst trying to finish DIY jobs around the house, plan a nursery and buying essentials prior to baby's arrival.

Now I'm more than happy to do my fair share of organising, and if I wasnt pregnant would be more than happy to arrange the whole event - but for now, there are 4 of us organising, therefore I'm happy to do a 1/4 of the work. In fact I've already planned more than the others so I'm definitely pulling my weight. I reckon I'll end up doing half the work - but I'm happy with that.

But ... I've just received an email from one of the planners (all cc'd in) pretty much saying we all know how great you are at organising (!) so feel free to take control and just let us know what you want us to do.

I've gone back in a very polite and nice way and said I'm probably not the best person to take control at the moment and said I've loads to arrange at the moment but I'm more than happy to do my fair share etc

Am I being unreasonable or totally reasonable in the circumstances?

OP posts:
PaisleyLeaf · 06/07/2011 14:41

The e-mail is a good opportunity for you - take them up on it!
They're pretty much asking you to delegate.
You can get this 'do' sorted just by e-mailing the others jobs to do.

HeidiKat · 06/07/2011 14:42

YANBU, who has the job of chief bridesmaid, surely it's their job to organise the hen do.

EveryonesJealousOfGingers · 06/07/2011 15:01

YANBU - agree with what Paisley said though - boss them about while you put your feet up and eat Magnums :)

Newmummytobe79 · 06/07/2011 15:04

I've just sent my first idea out - and requested more back :)

EveryonesJealousOfGingers ... do you know who I am? That Magnum comment is too close to home or do I just have a common 'craving' Grin

OP posts:
TrillianAstra · 06/07/2011 15:17

That's not an AIBU question. If you have had things dumped on your it's not something you have done, it's something that has been done to you, so you can't be reasonable or unreasonable.

Your friend is clearly looking for a way to opt out whlie pretending that it's because you like to organise stuff. I would reply with "Thank you for the compliment but I don't want to take over, I want us all to have input, especially since I am pregnant and very busy/tired at the moment". So YANBU at all.

Have some Soleros as well as Magnums - if you eat enough of them it might count as one of your 5 a day :)

Newmummytobe79 · 06/07/2011 15:28

TrillanAstra - good point! I was that mad I didn't put 'to be annoyed at ...'

Thankfully one of the girls in the email has stepped in and is helping me out :)

Phew! x

OP posts:
EveryonesJealousOfGingers · 06/07/2011 17:37

I crave magnums on a daily basis, pregnant or not - but maybe I do know who you are?!?!?! ;)

featherbag · 06/07/2011 20:26

Newmummy, I'm 19 weeks and have been craving Magnums like a mofo since about 11 weeks!

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