to think it is just not necessary to have a dining table anymore?

[LDNmummy]

Traditionally it has always been the look of a good home to have a dining table, preferably with its own area/ room in a house for family gatherings.

But, with modern life as it is, I just don't think it is necessary to have one anymore, unless of course you genuinely use it at least once a week. But do most families anymore?

I don't know many families who still go through the process of sitting around the dining table every weekend let alone every day, possibly for the fact that it is a little extra effort people are not as formal about anymore and sitting together doesn't have to be around a table but even just in the living room watching the telly together IYSWIM.

Plus, houses are not always big enough to accomodate a large family sized table and some may just feel it isnt worth the hassle to cram one in.

I also think this about the large cabinets that traditionally housed all a households fine dining wear that would come out on special occasions.

Aren't these bulky pieces of furniture that take up lots of space and are rarely used outdated now except with older people?

My MIL has a six seater table in the living room that could easily fit eight diners but is used properly about once a year. Half the reason for that is that it is too big and has to be crammed against a wall so isnt convenient to sit around daily or even weekly anyway. She also has a very large display cabinet full of her best dining wear wich is only used when special guests such as family travelling from abroad are visiting, which is rarely.

She is about 60 and in her eyes these two items of furniture are essential to beautify a home as well as for practical reasons, which IMO is questionable. My DM and all the older women in my family feel the same way.

But isnt this just all outdated and unecessary faff a house can do without in a time when people are no longer as formal when it comes to situations such as dining?

sorry - we eat meals not meaks !!

Ps we have a fully open plan downstairs so defnitely ?modern living? but a dining table is still really important to me ? we have a beautiful solid oak 6 seater (well 10 when it?s extended).

We eat everday at the table. Breakfast, tea and supper. My house would be a mess if i didnt make the kids eat at the table. Its easier as well as you just clear the table when they are finsished and dont have to go hunting for plates etc.

velvetsnow I don't know! I just think of lovely old farmhouses full of chunky wooden furniture and welsh dressers. It's just a silly stereotype.

We don't have a lot of space, but we still have a dining table (in the living room as we don't have a separate dining room, and the kitchen is tiny) We just made sure we got one that folds down when we aren't using it.

Although we do eat dinner at the table, it get used for many other things. I can't imagine where the Dcs would paint/do crafts/do homework without it. Even when we do eat on the sofas we use the table to put the food and drinks on so we can serve it out (I don't plate food up in the kitchen, everyone helps themselves at the table that way people only take what they're actually going to eat)

No BIWI- they come in pouches and a vacuum-packed you know? Don't you travel by hover car- everyone in my modern city does.

Of course, I could cram a table into my kitchen if I removed the large cabinet holding all my formal dining wear... but what would I eat off then?

Use mine every day. Wouldnt be without it. Sometimes theres only 2 of us, sometimes theres 7. Most days its something in between.

If i had to live in a house where there was no room for a dinning room table to be (or be unfolded in) i'd be upset and would look into moving. The telly is in the other room and goes off for 20 mins/half hour while we eat and catch up on each others news. I learn things about my 3DDs goings on which probly wouldnt have come up if we were all sat gawping at the tv while we ate. Exceptions = Sat. night take away on the sofas in front of tv!

I hate to see that most affordable new housing (which is by definition going to be needed by couples with young kids) is being put up without somewhere for a family to eat together

Before anyone starts off with the snobby stuff (too late), a lot of family together time takes place in my home (trips to library, outings, mealtimes, park visits, museum visits, sporting activities etc) so I suppose the formality of dining around a table has never seemed all that important to spend time together.

We do eat together, just not actually sitting at the table which was my main point, is the table itself necessary?

Obviously many feel it is and I accept that fully. During the week everyone in my home works and commutes very long hourse and usually don't get home till after half 7 or even 8 or 9 for my DH. There just doesn't seem to be time for the formality when dinner has to be cooked and people just want to relax on the sofa IYSWIM.

As I said, dinner is not perched on the knee. we always use serving trays as a rule and have side tables and always use coasters so it is very tidy, just not around the table.

There are no children in the house at the moment which obviously makes a big difference as everyone is adult. I am having my first LO in October and the reason I even asked is because I am having a full clearout and redecorating in anticipation and wonder if it is necessary to keep on having a dining table or get rid and have two large bookshelves instead as DH and I have a mountain of books. This would still take up less space than the table we have does at present.

We also have a dresser. DH built it out of an old chest of drawers and some mdf. It's lovely and very useful - but no dusty "best" china in sight. Don't have any.

Things my dining table is used for on a daily basis:

Breakfast
Lunch
Supper
Snacks
Arts and crafts / colouring / cutting and gluing
Mumsnetting
Making plans
A cuppa and a piece of cake with a neighbour
Putting things out of reach
Homework

In fact if I had to get rid of the sofa or the dining table, the sofa would go.

Am interested OP - where do you do the things on my list?

HappyDoll I'll let you off

even though my home is not a farm , it is full of old wooden chunky furniture, its open plan and all fits together nicely

Perhaps I'll buy a cow for the garden

We do eat together, just not actually sitting at the table which was my main point, is the table itself necessary?

Yes, why would we actually want to sit on the couch and slouch forward to a serving tray?

Where do you put the condiments/gravy/any extra dishes?

We eat at the table every night and the kids have their lunch there everyday. I hate sitting with food on laps.

I do have the tv on though. i like to watch the news

I have been thoroughly patronized by a HV who made a gentle suggestion that 'perhaps you could make the effort to all sit down for a meal every so often? Its so good for the children'

Coz i usually just stik em infront fo the xbox with a redbull and sum pringles innit?

We eat at ours everyday too (well the one in the kitchen everyday, the one in the sitting/dining room for special occasions and guests)

Anyways, I think they are really useful even if you don't eat on them that often. You can spread homework and crafts out on them (useful if your bedroom doesn't have a desk), they make a big flat surface for any measuring you need to do (I'm thinking sewing mainly), and it's nice to have somewhere to sit and keep the person who is doing the cooking company.

Of course families don't sit down to eat meals together...if you don't have a table and chairs! We eat 3 meals a day at our table, use it for arts/crafts, games, puzzles etc. It's not formal dining, it's family dining. It's not a "process" or an "effort" it's our daily routine and one we all take pleasure in.

A chicken or two would suffice VelvetSnow

I love the assumption that not eating at a dining table means the telly is on and everyone acts slovenly while eating, possibly grunting and scratching our crotches as we stare at X Factor and Corrie.

Before we had the DC we used the dining table about once or twice a month when we had people over and most meals were eaten in front of the tv (no talking).

Now we have DC we eat at the table for most meals (usually with far too much talking from DS1 who forgets to eat!), although occasionally we'll have a meal in the living room and watch a film as a treat.

I would happily give up the dining room furniture (our dining room doubles up as a play room) if we had a kitchen big enough for a table and chairs though!

Aha OP hasnt got children yet!

OP I'd get a table, honestly it'll be alot easier for all the things mention above.

And if space is an issue here's a pic on how we managed in our tiny deceptively spacious flat. Plus we managed to get bookcases in!

YABU

We have a dining table and use it every meal time. No TV at meal times, and whoever is in the house at the time is present at the table. Usually me and a combination of the DCs, all at breakfast, some at lunch, all at tea. At the weekends ALL meals are eaten as a family with DH as well.

No wonder some children don't know how to behave in restaurants if they aren't used to sitting down to have a meal every day. When I was a kid, we ate every meal at the dining table, including breakfast. It is a real shame if this is no longer the norm.

Sorry - X -post. No children makes a big difference.

Do you mean a dining table as well as a kitchen table?

Or are you really suggesting that people should not have a table for eating around?