To think my friend is an utter loon?

[Piggyleroux]

Prob should be in baby names, but need urgent help.

my best friend whom I've known since I was 12, is currently pg with her second child due next month. She already has an eight yo dd and this second child is a long time coming.

The issue is, her taste in names is truly shocking. Her dd is called Phatone, pronounced fertony, making her dd the brunt of some very cruel jokes at school. Her dd has already told me that as soon as she is 16 she plans on changing it.

Anyway, my friend calls me tonight to tell me that her and her dh have two names they like (they are having a boy)

Gryphon or Tedber.

Please, please dear mumsnetters, for the love of god, please make her see sense. (I told her I would post this on , she fully consents to canvass opinions )

No way is Phatone a real name. No way.

Tribpot, shit, I hope her dd never sees that.

Those names are fine, it not as if the kids are being called something awful like 'poohead' or 'dickhead', however in years to come they may be fashionable too, everyne wants their child to stand out and be special so thats why some children have ridiculous or pretententious names.

BOF it is a real name, when I was working in home care, there was a carer whose surname was fatone and she was Italian.

Scrofula or Embolism would be better (at least they're real words).

Your mate's mad.

Poor kids!

I am going to have to insist that you admit this is a windup

Nobody would call a girl Phat One. NOBODY.

Wat bout just 'phat' thats well cool

Honestly not a wind up.

Iwouldnot, it's pronounced fertony.

I don't see the problem. Why doesn't the dd just get people to call her Toni? And Teddy or Griff wouldn't be so bad either.

Nooo!

I can see the MN threads in years to come

"I was at school with Russell Spout"

" I knew a Tedber"

Been watching 'Angry boys' and the rapper's g/f is called 'Lou-excretia' haha, praps your b/f might like that one

I'm just..no, I can't even.

No.
No.

If you must choose made-up names, at least pronounce them as they're spelled.
Or actually, don't choose them in the first place.

Horrible.

If I was Phatone I'd be really narked that little bro got a better name.
Gryphon is no worse than a lot of hipster boys names about at the moment and Tedber can just hide behind Ted, can't he?

Poor Phatone.

(I pronounced it like SpaTone when I first read it. Poor girl.)

Bollocks.

look, here is where i saw tedber

(at my mum's house., i promise!!!)

Poor little 'fat tony' should just change her name now - she is old enough a 8. Tell her to pick a name she likes, ask her friends to use it, tell her teachers she will only answer to new name, and use new name with new people. Within 6 months the terrible name will be nowt but a memory of her mothers mad whim.

Since when is Phatone pronounced 'Fertony'? Fa tone y, or Fa toe nay perhaps, but not fertony. Where does the stress lie? It's boggling. Gryphon is out there but ok, Tedber - teddy bear. Awful.

I just can't believe this!

Tedber is like a joke out of spies like us:
"What's a dickfer?"
"To pee with."

A Gryphon is a mythical/fantasy creature. I love fantasy, but I have to say that "Gryphon" is going to make the mother sound like the worst kind of fantasy nutcase, the sort of person who changes her name to Galadriel and wants to call her son Blackwind or Stormwing. FGS, let him think up his own fantasy nickname when he's a teenager/goes to university! By doing it this early, when he's just not ready for it, he will never live up to the nickname (never even try), just try to live it down.

By the way, Phatone is going to be "fat one" at some point. Way to go, Betty. Very cruel to a child you should be protecting.

There was a 'Ferda - May' in the hospital when I had DS. we went to NICU, but my friend was being induced at the same time, and was next to the mother on the ward who was telling the midwife how unique her child would be, named after its' birth date...