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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

following on from my "can I take ds out with chicken pox" thread..

34 replies

LiegeAndLief · 13/06/2011 20:17

So ds is all scabbed over, went back to school today and no I didn't take him out.

However..

Dd hasn't had it and has no symptoms. She was obviously in very close contact with ds all the while, so seems highly likely that she is currently incubating (although I am still bfing her, no idea whether the antibody thing still happens at nearly 2yo). I had thought I would keep away from toddler groups for a couple of weeks, where she is likely to be sharing toys and be in very close contact with other children and possibly pregnant women or newborns, but not keep her in otherwise.

All the mums I've spoken to today though seem to think I'm overreacting and should just carry on as normal. WWYD? There seems to be a CP outbreak going on around here, local pre-schools and schools have cases, so there are probably lots of contagious pre-spot children around.

OP posts:

clemetteattlee · 13/06/2011 20:23

Just carry on as normal. It is not likely this first-time pregnant mums will be at playgroups, and if there are other pregnant mums who haven't had it and there is a local outbreak then they will probably be staying in themselves.

Original poster

LiegeAndLief · 13/06/2011 20:50

Was it you Clemette who went against the grain of opinion on the other thread and told me I could take ds out? In the interest of balance I need further opinions please!

OP posts:

clemetteattlee · 13/06/2011 20:53

It was. A lone voice in the wilderness me...

revolutionscoop · 13/06/2011 20:57

Er, clemetteattlee, that is diabolically bad advice. Not all pregnant women even know they are vulnerable to CP. Speaking as someone who actually contracted Chicken Pox in the second trimester, this is not a disease to be trifled with and the consequences for pregnant women can be pretty catastrophic. Also the disease is definitely more contagious before the spots actually appear. OP, I would try to keep her away from baby groups etc within reason, certainly ones which are held in enclosed spaces. The park is a better idea, as is visiting friends (or having them visit you).

TattyDevine · 13/06/2011 20:58

Ah this is the dilemma isn't it. I had this earlier in the year when my baby daughter had it. It was half term when she came down with it, of course. So we stayed in all of half term week so she wasn't spreading it around. It was miserable for DS.

The next weeks she was crusted over and he was due back at preschool. I knew full well he would probably be incubating it, because he hadn't had it and they play closely together. But the incubation period is 10-21 days, so what do I do, keep him home for a futher 2 weeks "just in case" after the most boring half term week ever, or send him into preschool, and see if he goes on to develop it?

I sent him to preschool. He did go on to develop it, and came out in spots the week after - so he had a whole week at preschool whilst he was his most infectious.

The following week he was home with me in the 2nd most boring week of his life, whilst he waited to crust over.

Honestly, you are damned if you do and damned if you don't so you follow the official rules and if you inadvertantly or otherwise end up passing it on to someone, well, sorry but someone probably did the same which is probably how your own kids got it...

revolutionscoop · 13/06/2011 20:59

Meant to add, the virus is airborne, transmitted via coughs and sneezes.

greensnail · 13/06/2011 21:01

I would carry on as normal. You don't know she's definitely incubating it. My 2yo DD1 didn't seem to get it despite being stuck in with DD2 when she had it. They're both still bf so I don't think that made any difference.

clemetteattlee · 13/06/2011 21:01

Diabolical
OPs DD doesn't have chicken pox, she just may have. Given your non diabolical advice, should nurseries close if they have one outbreak of CP given that all the children will be exposed and therefore also their maybe pregnant mothers?
What was interesting on the other thread was that, in other European countries, there is no quarantining of CP at all, with children with CP still going to school if they were well.

feebeecat · 13/06/2011 21:01

I had same dilemma when one of my twins had cp, thing is there was nothing wrong with the other and although likely she would develop it (and she did after a two week wait),it wasn't definite and I had no reason to keep her off all that time. I also canvassed opinion from other mothers & they had no problems with her being there.
Business as usual. If you kept a child indoors every time they 'may' be harbouring something, you may never leave the house again!

Original poster

LiegeAndLief · 13/06/2011 21:04

I have been taking her into school with me to drop off/pick up ds and no one has complained, although they must know she is likely incubating as ds is still covered in (crusted) spots! My biggest dilemma is a toddler group thingy which I have already paid for (pay for whole term in one go), but I know there will be at least one pregnant woman and one newborn baby there. I really don't think I can bring myself to go, I'll feel so guilty the whole time I'm there. I even felt guilty taking her into school today despite them have several cases there already!

OP posts:

2cats2many · 13/06/2011 21:04

Some siblings get chickenpox years apart. You'll only know if she has it when she gets the spots.

schmee · 13/06/2011 21:14

I kept my second twin away from playgroups and playdates for the incubation period (which was 15 days for us). We did go to the park though (big open expanse) and to the playground once - which I felt really uneasy about. Looking back that 2 weeks hasn't done us any permanent damage!

AlfalfaMum · 13/06/2011 21:27

DD3 came into contact with CP when I was breastfeeding, really close contact as in the little girl I was minding had them, didn't catch them. Nearly two years later, she shared a paddling pool with her best mate who broke out in CP the next day; DD3 still didn't get them.
She finally got them this year.
I do honestly think breastfeeding gives some immunity to CP, and it seems to last a year or two beyond breastfeeding.

muddleddaizy · 13/06/2011 21:44

Alfalfamum my ds2 was exclusively breastfed & got CP at 7weeks old, so I'd have to disagree with your statement :)

Northernlurker · 13/06/2011 21:47

Yes you are over-reacting. No reason why you shouldn't go out as normal now.

shouldbeelswhere · 13/06/2011 21:48

Yes I would echo what AlfalfaMum said. DS 1st day back to school today spots now crusted over but like you my DD who is 2, who has been in close contact hasn't had it (yet :) ) and has continued at nursery the whole time - their advise. DS didn't get it first time round when all his friends did (although we had playdates before and during their CP). I BF DD until she was 15mths so maybe some residual immunity?

MrsCampbellBlack · 13/06/2011 21:48

Bf doesn't give any immunity to chicken pox - newborns have some residual immunity if you've had it but it only lasts about 2 weeks. Believe me I did a lot of research into this as DS2 had it when DD was born.

I kept mine in when they had it but not when they were possibly incubating. Seriously we were in contact with chicken pox so many times when DS1 was small and he didn't get it - I couldn't possibly keep him in on the off-chance for weeks upon weeks.

So I would send to school when possibly incubating and think the vast majority do.

lazylula · 13/06/2011 22:01

Alfamummy, both my boys were ff (not through choice) and both have come into very close contact with children who have developed cp, some less than 24 hrs after close contact and at 5 and almost 3 are still yet to get it. It is just one of those things, my cousin's bf ds got it at 8 weeks and very badly too. I have continued as normal after contact with cp, otherwise I would spend most of my time away from civilisation as we seem to go from one incubation period to another!

Original poster

LiegeAndLief · 13/06/2011 22:10

Interesting about the bf and immunity info, MrsCampbellBlack.

My dc have been in contact with other children with chicken pox (just before the spots broke out) a few times and I have always carried on as normal - however, there's a bit of a difference in exposure between having a playdate for a few hours or even going to nursery together and living with your brother, especially when you are sharing his bath and trying to kiss his spots better

OP posts:

Bumbellina · 13/06/2011 22:14

mmmm, asides from all that, wanna come over? Eager for my DD2 to get it

heleninahandcart · 13/06/2011 22:19

When I had suspected chickenpox during pregnancy, it was treated very seriously. The hospital contacted me to tell me I was not to attend ante-natal classes and should not attend appointments etc until the outcome was confirmed. They also made a record of which appointments I had been to in case they needed to notify the other pregnant women. This was 17 years ago so guidelines may have changed.

However, unless you know your DC is clear I would think it reasonable to stay away from groups where they are pregnant women unless you have it confirmed by a health professional that it is ok.

shouldbeelswhere · 13/06/2011 22:20

I think I read somewhere 90% of children have had it before their 10th birthday. It's closing in on you Bumbellina!

peppapighastakenovermylife · 13/06/2011 22:21

My ds2 currently has CP at 9 months old -he is still demand breastfed. However he does have a mild case and he didn't have much hope really with DD gettingnit and kissing him full on the lips all the time!

I did take him into nursery when he could have been incubating it but the difference was that DD and most of her age at nursery got it, many with younger siblings and cross contacts between age groups first thing in the mornings so it was inevitable it would spread anyway really. And it would have been interesting explaining to work that I needed a month or more off just in case!

Loads of the babies are now off and I bet most of nursery will have had it by end of month. However I did keep him away from any non essential mingling and groups etc whilst he was potentially contagious

KD0706 · 13/06/2011 22:35

I completely understand the temptation but I think I would tend to stay away from places where you know she will be in close contact with pregnant women just in case.
I just think imagine if one of the pregnant women at baby group did catch it, and it affected the baby (I dont actually know what CP does to unborn babies, just that it's bad). You would feel awful especially since you are giving it thought already.

shouldbeelswhere · 15/06/2011 13:18

Ok we're back in quarantine! DD now has it, glad I missed the toddler group yesterday and stayed at home but probably infected a few at nursery on Monday...no wonder it does the rounds

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