I'm 34 and I was one of those annoyingly cheerily naive women who thought we'd won the war (because I had a good education and got to be a lawyer and earned good money blah blah so where was the inequality in that?) and have lots of male friends who would freely acknowledge I could paste them to the floor in most debates (pub-based or otherwise) and then BAM, I had a baby. And then I realised just how naive I had been.
I am sorry it took me so long to be this angry motivated and to realise and want things to change. I have wasted so many years with what was an essentially I'm alright Jack attitude (in the UK - I was an 'international' feminist in the sense I could see oppression/inequality in other countries but so much less so here).
What I don't get is why so many people expect 'Feminism' to be one homogenous thing? Like Judaism doesn't have orthodox or liberal reform and so many shades between? Like Communism doesn't have Stalin at one end and Gordon Brown at the other (erm....not my best example). It reminds me of how people expect each and every Muslim to be representative of an entire religion with as much in-fighting (Shia and Sunni and more) as most religions (Catholics and Protestants anyone?) and to be able to speak on behalf of all Muslims. Do we think the Pope speaks for all Christians? And while I was naive enough to think equality was here (and now I know it's really not) I don't think I have ever been so naive as to think some people who consider themselves aligned to a particular political movement or religious faith speak for all of those who might consider themselves feminists/communists/christians/muslims, let alone half of the entire world's population.
So Yabu, OP. A big fat YABU to you.
And I was foolish and naive when I was younger NOT because the hairy men-haters were putting me off feminism but because I so wanted to believe I lived in a world Feminism had made true. Having a son has made me horribly aware that this is not so. I suspect a lot of young women feel the same, existing in a fragile bubble of self-belief: that lapdancing clubs are cool, that their boyfriend's choice of porn is just what every man does, and that Nuts, Loaded and Cosmo really do provide insights into the male and female psyche.
A quote that has always rung so true to me about feminism is this, a feminist speaking to a men's conference about rape:
"I don't believe rape is inevitable or natural. If I did, I would have no reason to be here. If I did, my political practice would be different than it is. Have you ever wondered why we [women] are not just in armed combat against you? It's not because theres a shortage of kitchen knives in this country. It is because we believe in your humanity, against all the evidence."
To believe Feminism is about hating men or curtailing women's choices (be their choice to engage in prostitution or be a WOHM or SAHM or not be a mum at all) is to display, at best naivety, at worst ignorance. To be able to reconcile central tenets of a movement or faith with one's own existence and lifestyle demands self-awareness, analysis and self-reflection.
I say having a child changed my view. But maybe it was just the catalyst for thinking about how much better the world could be. Lots of people better than me don't need to have reproduced for that to occur to them and some of those people will change the future. But are we ever going to give them that chance while we're too busy decrying feminist stereotypes and ignoring the real causes of why women don't want to acknowledge equality doesn't exist. It is because the reality is just too, too horrible. Sadly.