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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to consider taking ds out with chicken pox?

114 replies

LiegeAndLief · 08/06/2011 20:47

Genuine question, am prepared to be told IAB outrageously U!

He is covered in spots but completely well in himself and has been bouncing off the walls. There is a playground a short drive from here that is nearly always deserted when we go and any kids there have always been school age. Would it be really bad to drive there during school hours, let him have a run around and jump back in the car in the very unlikely situation that someone turned up? I have no idea if the virus would be shed and stick to playground equipment etc where another child could pick it up.

I know how dangerous chicken pox can be to pregnant women, immunocompromised people etc so really don't want to put him in a situation where he might infect someone, but the selfish bit of me is desperate to get him out of the house!

OP posts:
AlfalfaMum · 08/06/2011 21:28

I feel your pain, my youngest two recently had them with 10 days inbetween :(

I checked all the health sites, and they are contagious for 5 days from the spots appearing, so if they appear on the Monday he is no longer contagious by the Saturday.

Sorry if I'm repeating anthing (haven't read all replies Blush) but here's my advice:
Invite friends who've already had the pox over to play.
Drive somewhere really secluded in the countryside and have a walk in the woods, avoiding other people completely (DD1 and I did this, and 'discovered' a lovely lake in the woods :))

xstitch · 08/06/2011 21:42

If he is still in the infectious stage then YABVU. Sorry.

My dd felt better as soon as the spots came out so I understand why it is driving you mad but I could not live with myself if I made someone critically ill or even killed them.

I fully intend to stay pregnant this time. It could possibly be the final straw for my anxiety if someone knowingly and un-necessarily exposed me to CP. Yes I know that is selfish but I also could not put another pregnant woman in the same position.

Also having seen a person in ITU on a ventilator due to CP I could not risk doing that to someone else. Adults who have not had CP, those on medication including steroids, transplant anti-rejection medication, MAB therapy, methotrextae for arthritis or psoriasis, diseases which themselves affect the immune system (eg leukeaemia) are at risk of CP. When I say at risk I mean at risk of serious potentially fatal complications.

Original poster
LiegeAndLief · 08/06/2011 21:47

I fully take on board what everyone is saying, and you're right, and I will keep him in, but those of you who are saying "it's only one week" are made of stronger stuff than me! Please tell me there are other people out there who feel faint at the thought of entertaining a 4yo and 1yo in the house for a whole week and I am not a terribly weak mother?!

Fingers crossed dd doesn't get it at all or the spots appear tomorrow, otherwise I guess it will be 2 weeks..

OP posts:
EttiKetti · 08/06/2011 21:51

Five days not a week, thats what we are told here, so you have done day one already :)

I would say no to taking him near others, I am immunocompromised and had a go at a friend yesterday who contracted CP over the weekend but was still out and abiout yesterday as normal :(

xstitch · 08/06/2011 21:54

[ahock] an adult did it etti? They should be ashamed of themselves.

Original poster
LiegeAndLief · 08/06/2011 21:58

Ok. Deep breaths. Four days to go. Maybe I could make myself a reward chart? That could be our activity for tomorrow morning Grin

OP posts:
fluffles · 08/06/2011 22:28

go hillwalking.. or pond dipping.. or to a big windswept deserted beach.. you don't actually have to say in the house, just away from people and from touching surfaces that other people will touch after him.

MiniMousse · 08/06/2011 22:41

Spent four days in hospital with my dd seriously ill from CP. It was horrific and something I wouldn't wish on anyone. She is not immunocompromised in any way but still ended up seriously ill. Please keep your children in until they are all scabbed over.

Chynah · 08/06/2011 22:47

I took mine to a local forest for a walk with his trike - never saw another person except from afar.

EttiKetti · 09/06/2011 06:19

xstitch yes, she thought it was really funny, my reaction, and made a huge deal out of blowing me a kiss etc.....this was both outside school and later at Brownies Angry

ShowOfHands · 09/06/2011 06:39

DD had the pox at easter. The weather was glorious and a brand new park had opened up in time for the easter holidays. DD was so excited about going. It's a pain in the neck, but the alternative doesn't bear thinking about.

Think of it as like one of those endurance challenges fit people do. Only with cbeebies.

xstitch · 09/06/2011 09:27

OMG etti she thought giving someone a potential death sentence was funny and you call her a friend. I couldn't call someone a friend after that. I hope nobody vulnerable gets infected by her for their sake not hers.

MrsCarriePooter · 09/06/2011 09:37

Has your 1 yr old had it yet? Realistically if not then surely in about a fortnight's time...

I had the same as above - my 3yr old caught it and 10 days later her 1 yr old brother did, so all in all we had several weeks of house arrest with a bit of running around wide open spaces (made worse by knowing that DS was probably infectious just as DD was getting over it, so I was very cautious how much contact he had with anyone in that period). It's horrible at the time and you have my sympathy but it does pass. At least it's summer!

Definitely wide empty open spaces, and any friends of his who have had it - or even children who haven't with relaxed parents who volunteered (I would never have asked them!). I would never knowingly put my children into contact with CP-ridden children but of my friends were happy to let their children who hadn't had it play with mine outside.

I remember reading on here the suggestion of going to McDonalds drive-thru if you're stuck for an activity as well. I never quite did but came very, very close.

Dancergirl · 09/06/2011 09:37

How long has he had the spots? If it's more than 4 days or so, then yes I would in the circumstances you describe. It's a deserted playground not packed with children!

WoTmania · 09/06/2011 09:42

YABU - CP is very contagious.
My grandfather has an auto-immune condition. HE has been etold that if he comes into contact with certain diseases it could kill himm. If I was out with DD and near your child and she caught it without me knowing, then we went to visit my GP's while she was at her most contaagious (i.e 5-6 days before spots come out) what do you think would happen?
But, you have my sympathy. My DS1 had it hen I was 38 weeks pg with DD and DS2 came out with it at 39 weks. I was going mad! At least it's summer and you can chuck them out in the garden. Do you ahve a paddling pool?

xstitch · 09/06/2011 09:48

dance even in a deserted playground you are touching the equipment. Another child could then come along and touch it an hour later and be infected. Even children can be immunocompromised.

yoshiLunk · 09/06/2011 09:59

It is rotten isn't it? and you are not alone in going just a tiny be stir crazy having to stay in. My DS's had in one after the other so it dragged on for weeks, - they were quite ill with high temps and vomiting too.

Can you arrange for any no-risk/immune friends and family to come round to you to help you with the children and relieve the boredom?

I would be interested if anyone could come up with the answer as to whether it can be caught from surfaces.

yoshiLunk · 09/06/2011 10:00

sorry x-post with xstitch, how long does the virus live on a surface for, do you know?

xstitch · 09/06/2011 10:03

It can be caught from surfaces. See under stop the virus spreading

onclefestere · 09/06/2011 10:05

don't do that! I have MS and I'd seriously resent your child giving me shingles. YABVU.

xstitch · 09/06/2011 10:06

Not sure yoshi viruses on average can last 24hr on surfaces. However some viruses can protect themselves by lying dormant when not on a warm blooded host and last longer others are not very good at all. I didn't specialise in virology so haven't done anything on viruses since I was a student so unfortunately I don't know where chicken pox sits in the survival scales.

whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 09/06/2011 10:06

Yoshi, up to 24 hours, I think.

missinglalaland · 09/06/2011 10:07

Sounds like the consensus is that you should stay in. So with that in mind here is my best outdoor entertainment for the kids. I take a soapy dish pan full of water outside and all of their grimy plastic toys, give them each a rag and let them clean their toys! They love this!?! They are entertained for a good hour. The toys are usually better off, no mess in my house, bliss!

Failing this, on the flip side (dirty), friends with little boys tell me their sons love to dig holes in the garden with old soup spoons. I'd definitely sacrifice some lawn/garden for peace and a tired child.

Good luck passing the time.

xstitch · 09/06/2011 10:08

You can't catch shingles from CP onclefestre. Shingles is caused by the chicken pox which lies dormant in your nerve endings reactivating along the line of that nerve. It can be reactivated when you are run down or sometimes after a knock to that site but not from contact with CP. You can however contract CP from contact with shingles.

Fuzzywuzzywozabear · 09/06/2011 10:10

When my had chicken pox and they were bored I'd put them in the bath with lots of sodium bicarbonate (no bubbles) and let them play in the water for as long as they wanted - I'd also gently sponge them with the SB water - some days they had 3 baths a day - I found the SD helped the spots dry out quicker