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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Poor Kids

559 replies

NearlySpring · 07/06/2011 23:08

Documentary on BBC1 now.

Sat here in tears watching this show following children living in poverty.

One woman, with 3 young girls all under 8. Her partner left her alone and she is struggling with money. The girls were given a sausage roll each for dinner. They are let out to play on a building site and derelict houses- where the he'll is the mother? Mother comes on saying how she can't cope financially- kids saying they have to miss meals as mummy can't always afford food. Next scene, mother has acrylic nails and a massive dog!

AIBU to ask if she can't afford to feed her kids basic cheap meals how the he'll does she feed a massive dog that is bigger than her 3 kids put together!

It must be terrible to be in that situation but surely you get your priorities straight. Who has a pet if they have no money?!!

OP posts:
LegoStuckinMyhoover · 08/06/2011 23:09

thanks theladyevenstar, sorry to hear that you got sworn at.

Capiche · 08/06/2011 23:09

the re location of the little girl from glasgow looked great but i felt wary that just like in the 50's and 60's they moved people out onto new soul-less estates

Fifis25StottieCakes · 08/06/2011 23:12

not to mention immigration. The only way to help peoplw is to built more affordable housing and replace the stock sold in the RTB scheme

MummaEss · 08/06/2011 23:13

DioneTheDiabolist, I had per week 63 quid income support for myself, 101 Child Tax credit for the girls (these are nation wide benefits), and rent and Council Tax paid (because I live in a council property). I live in Buckinghamshire where property and rents are high. We too have a HB cap but the friends I know who use HB to cover part of their private rent end up paying a minimal amount. I also of course get Child benefit. The only bills I had to pay were gas, electric and water. I was by no means living in luxury and had no financial security...my bank account would be at zero by the end of the week BUT......... I would have had to be to be a massive damn site poorer to make my kids go hungry. There is no need for it nowadays at all.

Thingumy · 08/06/2011 23:16

capiche -I don't think they gave a shit about soul less estates just that they were being rehoused into a home that wasn't full of damp and mould and detrimental to their health.

Capiche · 08/06/2011 23:21

thingmummy i know that but i just think as the years go by

Capiche · 08/06/2011 23:22

but it was lovely for them i agree - it was just the half hour away from their life iykwim?

DioneTheDiabolist · 08/06/2011 23:23

MummaEss, the people I spoke of are not paying minimal rent, they are having to fork out all their tax credits to cover the shortfall in rent. You too would have found it a whole lot harder to get by without that £101 a week and it doesn't take much to find yourself plunged into the poverty trap that the families in Poor Kids are in.

Thingumy · 08/06/2011 23:25
Capiche · 08/06/2011 23:56

undoubtedly but in 60s a lot of people felt abandonned out on estates

Fifis25StottieCakes · 09/06/2011 00:02

Capiche. i think it was more to do with living in the slums. My grandads half of the family lived on the Rabbit Banks in Gateshead. They didntt move until the last minute. They had always lived there and it was their home where they were comfortable

Capiche · 09/06/2011 00:06

yes and also had some sense of community

Strawbezza · 09/06/2011 00:15

I posted on this thread around 9-ish this morning, wow, some great discussions since then.

Will certainly look into how I can donate clothes and money to local needy families.

I wonder whether local councils could do something along the lines of free bus passes for these families during the school holidays, just to give them the freedom to escape their estate for a few hours? Go to a museum or a country walk, both are free.

Fifis25StottieCakes · 09/06/2011 00:16

Yes but i think it was more to do with the era. People had to help each other as they were in crippling poverty. My Granddads dad was an alchi. He would go to the bar then throw his loose change out for the kids in the street. the next day they would have nothing. He had 8 brothers and 2 sister. he used to play football in the street with no shoes as he had non and a well dressed gent took him to the cobblers and bought him boots. He never forgot that

bethelbeth · 09/06/2011 00:26

fifi that's hilarious. I never pictured you as a bonkers gal!

thingumy it seems to be quite normal for social housing applicants who can't be housed to be put into hotels or b&bs. Although the hotels and b&bs that are available are decidedly low rent and tend to be full of ladies of the night and drug addicts.
Definitely not a place for kids.

It's quite sad really, there's one of these hotels across from my work, I think 40 years ago it was probably very swish, but now it's a £20-£30 a night dive. It's an eyeopener for the poor tourists who find themselves mingling with families who are temporarily living there and the various druggies etc.

Some of these hotels are being used solely for social housing claimants, and have in fact turned nice areas into ghettos- making beautiful sandstone tenement flats and maisonettes unsellable because of the drugs and crime that they bring to the area. (Tends to be single drug addicts etc rather than families- I doubt that even the housing association would dream of putting a family in there)

TheLadyEvenstar · 09/06/2011 00:29

Ohhh it is getting tetchy on the FB page. There are so many people who are NOT thinking of the children. Sams sister is on the page being 16yrs old. Some of the comments being made are quite below the belt.

Oh and now I am lazy hahahahaha

TheLadyEvenstar · 09/06/2011 00:33

Poor Kids FB

Donations can be sent to

Poor Kids
True Vision Foundation
49a Oxford Road South
London
W4 3DD

Just mark the package with who you want it to go to and include the cost of forwarding the items.

Capiche · 09/06/2011 00:42

thamks for the link

TheLadyEvenstar · 09/06/2011 00:47

YW,

CheerfulYank · 09/06/2011 03:40

THEY CAN SHUT OFF THE FUEL IN THE WINTERTIME?! Shock Shock Shock

Lorenz · 09/06/2011 07:42

When I was younger I got with a man who had a young child. The child's mother had walked out on them and he'd seemingly regressed into a child-like state of thinking "well, it's not my fault our lives are shit" and he took no responsibility at all. He was short of money, this meant that his child had ONE pair of jogging suit bottoms for the weekend that were too small, one pair of pyjamas that were years old and worn, old underwear. He also went around in old tatty clothes, stuff that was far too big, bought from car boot sales because he was "skint".

But was he skint? or was it down to the fact that the pair of them would eat take-aways 3 times a week or the fact that he chose to spend his money on silly things such as "an acre of the moon" or Sky Sports?

He was that "skint" that they were only "allowed" a shower once a week and he only flushed the toilet if it had poo in it to save water.

They were living in poverty but they didn't need to be!! they were on the exact same income as me and my kids were always dressed properly and could shower every day etc.

Within a few months of us knowing each other I was able to teach him to prioritise, save and stop being so bloody stupid.

It worked a good couple of years and the child was so much better off. When we split he went back to his old ways. I've since heard that the child insists on proper clothes now and showers mostly every night so I managed to turn the kid at least. The bloke - well you just can't help some people.

Riveninside · 09/06/2011 08:15

It takes one thing breaking to setnoff years of debt. Especially as people on benefits cannot get an easy cheap loan like those working. They have to take out a provident loan or loan shark one at 1000's of a per cent interest.

lesley33 · 09/06/2011 08:15

People forget that the council tower blocks and estates were built to replace slum housing. In Glasgow in the 50's/60's the majority of poorer people lived in 1 or 2 rooms with a shared outside toilet and no bathroom.

Understandably it was recognised that this was inadequate and overcrowded housing and so estates and tower blocks were built to give people enough space and so they could have indoor bathrooms and proper kitchens.

The problem wasn't that nhew estates were built - the problem is that much of the housing erected was done on the cheap and thus now has major problems such as damp.

CheerfulYank · 09/06/2011 08:18

But the fuel thing...seriously, it's legal there to cut it off in the winter?

OpinionatedPlusSprogs · 09/06/2011 08:24

yes, cheerful yank. Most people in council and private rented are on pre payment meters. You pay upfront and it cuts off as soon as the money runs out. You get £5 emergency and thats it. (my gas for a less than a week in winter) Pre pay is often more expensive than other methods of payment. Scandalous, but lets get back to bitching about nails, fags and dogs.