To think if you're incapable of keeping your kids quiet then you shouldn't go on guided tours

[VivaLeBeaver]

Went to Kew the other day, been looking forward to it for months years , never been before. We paid extra to go on the land train thing that takes you round and the bloke did what was probably an interesting running commentary.

There were 2 yummy mummies and their 2 girls sat infront of us. The driver had said at the beginning to try and keep children quiet so people could hear.

Now I could understand babies or toddlers shrieking a bit and would let that pass but these 2 girls were 6 or 7 - old enough to know better. They talked loudly nearly the whole way round. 2 mums were too busy talking (quietly) to each other to really bother with the kids, they did a few half hearted Shuushs a couple of times but to no effect.

At that age if DD had behaved like that I'd have told her we were getting off and walking if she didn't stop and I'd have carried the threat out. As it was I hardly heard anything the driver said.

I got carried away at one point and did a Shhhh myself and one of the mums turned round and I had to glare at DD and pretend I was shusshing her.

I probably am being an unreasonable, crotchy cow but other peoples' lack of consideration for others winds me up more and more these days.

Why pretend?
Why couldn't you say that you were sorry but you couldn't hear the commentary over the children's chatter?

Maybe I should have done, they must have known though. I guess I didn't want any confrontation.

YANBU

And the mental image I have of you shhhing your confused DD has cracked me up

Does this extend to kids with SN too?

Next time - say something. It won't occur to the parents unless someone points it out.

No it doesn't extend to kids with SN. Like I said in the first place toddlers and babies are also exempt.

And I don't for one minute believe these 2 kids had SN. I know that I'll now get jumped on and told that there are different levels of SN, etc, etc and they can be invisable so how can I tell, yadda, yadda, yadda. Well I just could. 2 uber posh kids who have obviously been brought up to think the world revolves around them yacking about pony lessons.

Ahh okies. Mine do make involuntary noises which can be a bit

Well it should occur to the parents. I never had to be told by others to keep DD quiet when she was little. If we were out and she started sqwarking I'd tell her straight away that there are other people about who do not want to listen to her. Why is that so hard for some parents to grasp?

You probably shouldn't fly with easyjet either . Actually, I take that back. You shouldn't fly with easyjet if restless children (whose ears are really hurting actually madam, so stop tutting) are not your thing.

YABNU

How rude. I hate these kinds of kids who think the world revolves around them. The mums are just as bad to let them carry on. Why bother going on the tour if all they wanted to do was talk?

Now there was a boy on the train one day with obvious SN who was making noises and DD was looking at him with a bit of a face. She was soon given a swift kick on the ankle by me and mouthed at not to stare. We had a chat about SN after he'd gone.

YANBU. I hate paretns like that. They probably got on just to sit down for a while as clearly none of them were intersted in the commentary.

I just came back from holiday. I couldn't help but notice that the children there behaved themselves in public far better than children here. At one stage a child who looked about 6/7 stood in the rain for an hour with her mother in a queue for the museum. She was impecabbly behaved. She was in high spirits, talking to her mum, no screaming, whining or bad behaviour. if she did something that wasn't to her mother's liking her mother told her to stop it and stand still and she did instantly.

The behaviour was the same in restaurants, in shops, out in the street and on public transport. I couldn't help but notice that children are told to stand /sit still and behave in public..... and they did!

I get back to the UK and first day shopping to restock house after holiday, children everywhere on scooters getting in the way and in one ase racing along a shopping center with it while ringing the bell for people to get out of his way. IMO they're outdoor toys and should stay outdoors. Go to a cafe or a resturant and they can't sit stil, for 5 f-ing minutes. They have to whinge and cry or get up and around.Or they need something to entertain them as they can't sit quietly for a few minutes without entertainment.

IMO parents like those of the 2 spoiled Kew brats should be teaching their DC's to shut the fuck up and sit quietly. It isnt' that hard.

Yanbu but manners begin at home and IMO wtf you get on a guided tour to talk through it (both mother and child) is beyond me.

MightyAphrodite - the OP is asking that parents of children who are perfectly well able to behave (old enough, not SN, also not suffering ear pain), actually get their children to behave. It sounds like these mums had no excuse not to make their girls sit quietly so other people could listen to the commentary on the landtrain. How on earth that equates to travelling on easijet escapes me!

Actually I like it when young children stare at my ds when he does his autism stuff. It is so refreshing and innocent.

Even better when they ask outright what he is doing so I can explain, or better still he stops doing it as he is so delighted another child has come over...

Do you know I've travelled on easy jet loads and never been bothered by kids in such situations. I do think there's a difference in behaviour expectations between kids on a 20 min bus ride who can't shut up and tired kids who have been travelling for hours. Plus on a flight the parents can't take the kid off the flight, the guided tour had six stops where you could get on and off. These women chose to stay on the tour with their annoying kids.

That's nice starlight. I wasn't sure if this boy might be freaked out by being looked at, he seemed quite stressed, agitated and I didn't want to make him worse.

A while back I asked a young boy (nicely) who was coming into the ward to use the alcohol gel. His dad started shouting at me that he had autism and I'd really upset him. I was mortified but had no idea when I first spoke to him. He hthn had a total meltdown.

Ah well. You get nice parents and nasty parents of children with ASD just like with all children. I suppose, on average, parents with children with disabilities are likely to be just a bit more touchy than average due to sheer tiredness though.

But my ds has to live in the real world with the reactions of real people and in general I prefer it is both him and the other person learn something with each interaction. But his disability can be very hidden sometimes so I don't have it as hard as many.

Well sorry SDTG. Just felt like sharing. No need to italicise.

I also find it annoying when precocious children answer back to a guide all the time, in an 'I already knew that actually' kind of manner and the parents just smile at them indulgently. I was once on a guided tour of some caves with my dad and one little lad of about 8 just kept on and on at the guide, wouldn't let her get a word in edgeways, expected to be allowed to go places and touch things that were out of bounds, demanded to use her torch, etc. And was so contemptuous about anything she tried to tell him. His mum just smiled constantly at him, whereas I'm sure the rest of us on the tour were thoroughly sick of him. My dad told me afterwards that there is no way I would have been allowed to act like that on a tour when I was that age.