to be so pissed of with "d" p that I'm sat here crying after my first night out in nearly a year :'(

[IBlameThePenguins]

My first ever AIBU...Am a little pissed, and really just want to get this down somewhere, more than anything else... So, my second night out since dd was born 21months ago. I've has PND, and get so anxious about going out, but I had an amazing time...lost DP half way through, but danced from beginning to end, and felt so happy. Anyway, cut to taxi home, "D"P vomits everywhere...he's 30 years old....cue fucking £60 fine. He is being made redundant at the end of the month. We have saved and scrimped for this for ages....it will be our last night out for a very long time. We didn't have the cash on us, so my friends helped to pay it...i don't know how we're going to find £60 to pay them all back. I'm just sobbing at the laptop...i suppose I needed to vent more than anything... :(

Calm down, anyone can vomit after a few drinks - it could easily have been you since you said you're also pissed. Maybe your friend can take payment in installments?

Poor you. Has he had nights out alone without you since birth of baby? Not at all making excuses but is this his second night out also? Has he overcompensated for not going out much by necking too much booze and reacting badly? Is he stressed out with the redundancy and just went a bit wild and threw too much beer down his throat as a bit of a release?

Don't worry about the money, easier said I know, but good friends won't sweat it and if you have a quiet word surely they will be OK with you paying it back as and when you can.

As you say in your OP - you had an amazing night so remember that! If you can have a quick word with the friends about the money that will relieve you of some of the stress and then have a conversation with your DP about how or why he got in such a state. I would bet that the stress of new baby and losing his job has had an impact on his behaviour.

awww ..take a deep breath ,have a coffee ,it won't seem so bad in the morning

I'm sure your friends will let you pay it back over time

I suppose you're right...I guess it's just the wine making me over react...it's just that I was so anxious about going out, and then had such a lovely time, I feel so embarassed that they all had to pay so much. Of course we he will find a way to pay him back. The fact is, it wasn't me, because I know my limit and stop there...him, not so much.

"anyone can vomit after a few drinks"

My experience is the opposite... People tend to vomit when they've drank so much they are at the blackout stage!! This is usually idiots who think they are cool and teenagers who don't know their limits!! OP's DH is 30, so should know better.

OP - YANBU. How many friends do you owe money to now, and how much? Could you perhaps pay off one person per week/fortnight? Perhaps sell a much loved PS/xbox? :P

ahh, x -posted with takeme (rather apt name) and usualsuspect. I expect you're right Takeme. Thanks for the kind words and a bit of perspective. Will have a few pints of water, then off to bed,as I suspect it will be me getting up at 5.30 with DD. Thanks for letting me vent.

YANBU, but... breathe.

It's very annoying, but not worth upsetting yourself over right now. It is horrible when money is tight, but save the worrying until tomorrow.

If your friends don't need the money straight away, maybe you can pay them back a little at a time.

For the time being, console yourself in the fact that you've got a lovely DD, friends that care enough to help, and a DP who (although he made a bit of an idiot of himself), will hopefully try to make this up to you.

Must add - not making excuses for him, of course if I was you i'd be fuming but then this is the point of AIBU :-)

Get a cup of tea/coffee/pint of vodka sleep tonight and tackle things in the morning. Above all, don't worry about the money from the friends, ask yourself, if it was a friend of yours in that position what would you do? You would help out. Would you be fretting about it and holding it against the friend? No! So they will not be doing the same with you. Speak to your DP and find out the reasons. (and if he was just a drunken nobber then make him pay )

kw- I have already told him he will have to sell the xbox to pay them all back. I probably am over reacting. Tonight was just such a big deal to me. I am on my third pint of water. Would IBU to make him sleep on the sofa?

Just go to bed ...

sort it tomorrow

Oh dear! Sounds horrible darlin', Make yourself a cup on tea or a nice cold squash with ice in it, Go have a nice sleep and wake him up really early tomorrow morning! Kick the greedy bugger out of bed at the crack of dawn! (Say you need sleep after all the stress of last night and he needs to clean the -enter your domestic wish here-) Your friends will be fine but make sure he deals with the paying back of money!

The big arse

The important thing is that you went out and had a great time - focus on that! I'm sure your DP feels pretty embarrassed about what happened so don't be too hard on him. I've thrown up loads of times in the past after having too much to drink - I'm far more sensible now but I do have some sympathy for him as well as you!

thanks for waking him for me sqee. He has been sick again and its all over my bathroom. I'm furious!

You're right lilbreeze..i guess most of us have been there at one stage or another. I really am off to bed now

yhanks again for the sympathetic ears

I hope you cleaned it up! :o (I, ofcorse have never threw up anywhere.. < adjusts slanty halo> Ahem [hrmm])

**

No I disagree. I throw up after 2 glasses of wine. I am truly pathetic. Hope that helps. x

Oh sweetie make sure he lays on his stomach or side, I know that's extra stress for you but he can't lay on his back if he is THAT boaky. If it gets any worse call a family member. What a silly shyte he is!