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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to leave my dc in ythe garden sceaming and tantruming at each other

36 replies

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:15

because I cant referee another flippin fight today else my brain will explode or implode or something.

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 03/06/2011 16:16

no neighbour worries then??

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:17

yep neighbours both sides are out sunbathing, b ut surely me screaming and shouting will only make it worse for them.

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Icelollycraving · 03/06/2011 16:18

Don't like your neighbours then??

NoobytheWaspSlayer · 03/06/2011 16:18

Here, have this . YANBU. My little devils charmers are overheated, overtired and grumpy. Early bed tonight!

worraliberty · 03/06/2011 16:18

YABU your kids..you need to care for them.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:20

they are perfectly cared for, they have drinks and plenty to do and are perfectly safe, i am watching them through the window (cant go out in heat else burn instantly) they are bickering like mad, my intervention will do little except get me annoyed and make them and me shout more.

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QuickLookBusy · 03/06/2011 16:22

When mine were hot, sweaty and argumentative they were given an early coolish bath, some tea, a quick story then bed.

I am assuming they are little ones though.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:23

not little enough to put to bed, 5 and 7, they have calmed down again now, they are fine and then every 5 mins they have a screaming match.

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Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:23

bath would be a really good idea though.

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worraliberty · 03/06/2011 16:24

Shouting at them isn't caring for them is it?

Why not go out and play with them..or tell them if they don't behave, they'll have to come indoors. You can always cover up from the sun by the way.

It would drive me mad living nextdoor to a noise like that...and then a sreaming mother on top of it all.

dickiedavisthunderthighs · 03/06/2011 16:24

If I was sunbathing in my garden and all I could hear was two kids "screaming and tantruming" at each other I think I would very much like said kids' mum to get out there and do something about it.

GypsyMoth · 03/06/2011 16:26

i wouldnt want to live next dooe to it either

your kids= your responsibility

bring them in and watch a dvd,the heat makes everything worse. maybe they need to cool down

rainbowinthesky · 03/06/2011 16:27

If I was your neighbour I'd complain.

HSMM · 03/06/2011 16:32

Paddling pool, or just a bucket of water to cool them down?

TheLadyEvenstar · 03/06/2011 16:34

I am forever apologising to my neighbours about DS1's tantrums - at first they were sort of looking at the size of him, until I explained when he wasn't around that he has "meltdowns" due to him have aspergers.

But still it is my responsibility to deal with things as they arise and would not leave them in the garden to bicker - Can't play nicely? - go to your bedrooms and play alone.

Goblinchild · 03/06/2011 16:34

I was out gardening, but the three children next door are having a screaming match and their father has joined in yelling.
I'll be the one cutting the hedge at 11pm then.
And shredding the remains.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:36

paddling pool burst last hols (mind you they would make noise in that as well) garden is completly south facing so absolutly boiling, have called just about everyone I know this afternoon but noone around, cant think of anywhere to take them (bit late now anyway) they get really grumpy if stuck in the house, they seem a lot better now are reading on the trampoline which appears to be in the only bit of shade.

I meant to get another paddling pool and then I thinkk it cooled down a b it and I forgot.

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CoffeeIsMyFriend · 03/06/2011 16:38

There are 2 children who live a few doors from me. 1 is about 3 and the other approx 9months- a year old and the baby never seems to stop crying.

It drives me insane when I am out in the garden, I really struggle with continual baby crying and have to come inside.

reelingintheyears · 03/06/2011 16:42

There are three boys who live next door to me.

Their trampoline is almost beneath DS2s bedroom.

They fight and argue constantly..

It is a drag.

They are nice kids in the main and i won't complain but............[grrr]

Goblinchild · 03/06/2011 16:45

I have a very high tolerance for happy noise from whatever source.
Happy shrieking doesn't bother me at all, or random instruments played badly. It's just the anger and the squabbling and the ineffectual roars from adults that annoy.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:47

they have not actually been outside for that long as I wouldnt letr them earlier because of the heat. and they will be in shortly for bath and dinner so not really all day, they have been arguing all day though mainly because they were bored being stuck in. they ahve not actually argued again since I posted the op.

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worraliberty · 03/06/2011 16:51

I love happy noises floating across the gardens..even the ear piercing screetches of delight from the little girl in the next road

But but squabbling/bickering is like a bloody car alarm that doesn't stop. My kids are always warned and sent to their rooms to calm down...then given another chance to play nicely back outside.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 16:52

goblin child I am, the same, the problem is my input will onyl make it louder, they will scream their side of the argument at me and whoever ends up being inb the wrong will have a paddy, if I leave them to it they will sort it out very quickly and go back to playing nicely or as they were actually doing reading. I am trying to teach myself not to intervene so much.

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Goblinchild · 03/06/2011 17:04

That sounds reasonable, the three next door fight for hours with each other, and the littlest has a huge scream. They are 9, 6 and 4.

Original poster

ditavonteesed · 03/06/2011 17:11

I know that as a family we make far too much noise, dd1 has real anger management problems and tbh I am at my wits end as to what to do about it. she gives vey little warning and just loses her temper for nothing (obviously not to her and I am trying to get her to explain to me more why she is so upset/angry all the time) and will then scream and shout for what seems like hours, she will calm down on her own (usually probably about 10/15 mins) but if I try to talk to her or intervene in any way it will take twice as long again. dd2 spends a lot of the time screaming or in tears because dd1 can be horrible to her when she is like this.

I actually need to get to the b ottom of it, but she has been like it on and off since being a toddler.

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