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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell our neighbour she can't use our garden tap

26 replies

minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 21:56

The garden of our house (divided into flats) is also divided and our upstairs neighbour owns the bit of garden at the end.

She is a very unpleasant and difficult woman. She didn't actually live here for several years and would not return contact if we ever tried to speak to her about problems (leaks etc.).

She has refused to pay her share for works done (still owes us £500 for damp course and owes girl in top flat money for carpeting the stairs).

Tonight I met her by chance in the street and she told me nice as pie that she wants to spray weedkiller in her garden and needs water for this and could she use our garden tap so she doesn't have to carry watering cans up and down stairs.

I was pretty astounded at the cheek (the last time I spoke to her she put the phone down on me and said I was never to phone her again because I told her there was water dripping through our ceiling and she had to sort it out).

I told her we didn't have a tap she could use. Now I am worried she will do something horrible to us. She is honestly the most horrible person I have ever encountered.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Mumwithadragontattoo · 02/06/2011 21:59

YANBU - she is asking a favour of you. You don't want to agree to it because of the unpleasant way she has treated you in the past. That seems fair enough to me. It's hardly that big a deal getting water from your own flat anyway so she can't really be that put out.

AgentZigzag · 02/06/2011 22:01

You didn't just say 'no, fuck off you cheeky cow' though did you?

She sounds a nightmare, we've got great neighbours here and would do anything for them, but that's because they're nice back.

I don't blame you not wanting to share anything with her.

worraliberty · 02/06/2011 22:01

Yeah I'd just let her use it and put anything else (money-wise) down on paper before paying out.

MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2011 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 02/06/2011 22:03

Do you really not have a tap or was it an excuse? If it was an excuse and you really do have a tap, just tell her you're on a water meter and sorry but she can't use it.

MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2011 22:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:08

We have lovely other neighbours - and we do favours for each other (I am feeding their chickens and gecko this week) and go to barbecues etc., but she is something else!

She seems to think that now she has moved back she just has to ask nicely and we will forget the money owed etc. and just do whatever she says.

My husband says she will probably just wait till we go out and use our tap anyway.

I hate the idea of her snooping about in our garden. We have to give her access to her garden via our side gate. I am worried she will let my little cat out deliberately or leave the gate unlocked to spite me now.

OP posts:
Avantia · 02/06/2011 22:11

Tell her that she can use your tap once the cheque for £500 has cleared .

EricNorthmansMistress · 02/06/2011 22:12

If she asks again, or points out that you have a tap, say you are on a meter and trying to economise. YANBU not to do her a favour, she sounds nasty.

Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:13

Yes I hate weedkiller too!

It's funny really. We do have a tap and she can see it from her window, but when she asked me I just sort of panicked and said we don't have a tap! My husband thought this was very amusing.

He toyed with the idea of unscrewing the tap but then decided he couldn't be arsed and he would just ignore her.

I don't know why but I am abit scared of her. She is so nasty for no reason - it throws you.

OP posts:
befuzzled · 02/06/2011 22:13

turn off your outside tap - there is normally a switch under the sink or somewhere near where you can stop your water (stopcock?) in the event of a leak. Petty I know but sounds like she deserves it.

missnevermind · 02/06/2011 22:14

We take the head off our tap and keep it with the keys so that the neighbours don't use it as nobody else would pay to have one fitted.

AgentZigzag · 02/06/2011 22:16

Definately turn the tap off, you don't want the water to freeze in the pipes...or something... Grin

You woudn't have been lying then.

MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2011 22:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2011 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:21

THe last time her garden got waist high in weeds (she hardly ever does it) she got a student to come and weed it by hand as a favour. It was a boiling hot day.
I ended up giving the poor girl tea and cake. Evil neighbour had instructed her to burn all the weeds - we told her not to as she could have set fire to our garden in the process.

OP posts:
GreenEyesandHam · 02/06/2011 22:24

You were perfectly honest, you don't have a tap that she can use

Honestly, what's she gonna do?

Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:25

Madam Deathstare she always talks to me like I am incompetent anyway because when she first bought her flat she was constantly badgering me about giving access to builders or giving permission for velux windows and I used to shut her up by saying she would have to ask my husband.

She decided I was either stupid or completely submissive so she talks to me like I am a child.

She once appeared in the supermarket when I was mid-shop to pester me about planning permission.

OP posts:
Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:29

GreeneyesandHam - you are right I guess all she can do is march up and down with her watering cans.

I don't know why but I am worried she will do something to our cat (it likes to look in her windows!).

OP posts:
GooGooMuck · 02/06/2011 22:32

Cheeky bitch.

It does worry me, being on here, the amount of 'nice' people ( and I do mean that, OP, you seem nice enough) seething with resentment, when they are being perfectly civil on the outside.

Loads of people might hate me, and I'd never know Confused

See, I'm the type that would just say it, "you owe me £500, you were rude and put the phone down on me, so no you can't use my fucking tap, and when I see you marching up and down with buckets of water I'm going to sit with a gin in my garden and smirk at you from under my sunglasses ".

GreenEyesandHam · 02/06/2011 22:34

She sounds like a bit batty, a bit self serving but she probably isn't a hard hearted cat killer.

Although...if your furry friend goes missing for a while, maybe check your wheelie bin Grin

Original poster
minieggfannomore · 02/06/2011 22:37

yes googoomuck - I am useless as confrontation. I just seethe inside as you say.
I guess she knows I hate her though because I made up a bare faced lie so she couldn't use our water.
I like the idea of drinking gin and watching her toil. Nice one!

OP posts:
MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2011 23:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IloveJudgeJudy · 02/06/2011 23:51

You could also get a tap lock. They're about £16 from amazon/ebay. If I were you I would also get a self-shutting gate on my garden. She sounds horrible.

bubblecoral · 02/06/2011 23:55

Be the bigger person and let her use the tap.

But only if you're not metered. If you are, then get rid of the tap or lock it.