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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think my ds(5) is too young for sleepovers?

27 replies

griffalo2 · 28/05/2011 20:45

I've told him he has to wait till hes at least 7,am I bein a clingy worried mum?(hes my only child)
I just think hes way too young but most of the other kids at school seem to be going on them.

OP posts:
FunnysInTheGarden · 28/05/2011 20:48

If your child is happy with it then he is not too young. If he would be upset then he is. DS1 is 5 and would prob be OK with a sleep over. I don't think you should impose an age limit, just see when he is happy and ready to do it.

ikilledBosco · 28/05/2011 20:48

I agree with you but i am way too over protective with my dc's Grin

LynetteScavo · 28/05/2011 20:49

It depends on the child, and how well they know the family they with.

DS slept at relatives at 5, but no way would I have let him sleep at a friends. He still had pull ups at night, and needed us to sit with him until he was asleep.

DD would happily skip of to anyones house for a sleepover. She was invited to spend the night at one friends, but I don't entirely trust the parents, so it didn't happen.

Lilyloo · 28/05/2011 20:50

I agree 5 is too young imo unless they are staying with family

bibbitybobbityhat · 28/05/2011 20:50

Yanbu. At that age there is guaranteed to be one child who changes their mind at the last minute and desperately wants to go home!

Casey76 · 28/05/2011 20:50

Maybe at a relatives but there is no way I would let my child sleep at a friends at that age.

Punkatheart · 28/05/2011 20:51

Too young. I worry now and my DD cannot stay with strangers - even if the child is a friend. She's 14.

MovingAndScared · 28/05/2011 20:55

I think if I know the parents then fine - if I had never met them then no - my 5 year old has had a couple of sleep overs -

susiey · 28/05/2011 20:59

I would only let my 5 year old daughter sleepover with either family or close family friends

to be honest i am quite protective about sleepovers generally and would have to know the family incredibly well before I would allow my dc to sleepover at a friends house.less so about school trips etc

Original poster
griffalo2 · 28/05/2011 21:01

Hes never stayed anywhere without me and had occasional wet beds if out of routine,still has comfort blanket for bed too(its a cot quilt so quite big)
Do thinks he should be going and will do him good.
No way

OP posts:
CurrySpice · 28/05/2011 21:02

Really depends on where he's going. To close friends of the family, or family, yes, or with cubs or something. If it's a random friend he's made at school, no

chosenone · 28/05/2011 21:04

Mine have slept at grandparents since babies and 1st stayed with friends at 4. They were close friends of mine so I was more than happy. I too have had two of DS's friends over for a sleepover here, it was great fun, everyone settled and behaved. But these very are close friends children someone random from school? tea? sleepover - no way

Original poster
griffalo2 · 28/05/2011 21:13

Hes had playdates with one little boy from school,hes been here a few times and ds been to his for tea a few times.the boy always had other friends over for sleepovers and I feel mean saying no.i also dont want the boys mum to be offended so I feel quite awkward.
Thank you for replies hes no where near ready for sure

OP posts:
Bonsoir · 28/05/2011 21:26

5 is just about the right age to start sleepovers. My DD started sleepovers this school year (the one in which she has turned 6) and they are going swimmingly! In fact, she is going to have a sleepover party on the last weekend of the school year.

TruthSweet · 28/05/2011 21:27

DD1 (5.2y/o) had a school friend who's the same age over last night for a sleep over. They had tea, DH & I put DD2 & DD3 to bed at 6.30 and DD1 & her friend played until 8pm when they got ready for bed. She got picked up in the morning and a nice time was had by all.

DD1 has been on a sleep over at a friend's house just before Xmas. She's 'known' him since they were 3m so I know the family well and trust them.

DD1/DD2 have only stayed at GPs when the next baby was born though we did do a trial run a little while before hand in case of any major issues.

If your son doesn't want to go or is not happy in pullups/not reliable at going to loo in night then it might not be the right time for him. No shame in it and nothing to be embarrassed about, just say to the other mum 'now's not the right time for us for DS to sleep over' and leave it at that.

chocolatchaud · 28/05/2011 21:28

Mine have been on sleepovers from age 4, but only to close friends' houses - not sure I would be so keen on a school friend's house (they would have had enough by bedtime anyway!)

Bonsoir · 28/05/2011 21:32

My DD (6.6) is having a friend to sleep over on Sunday night (ie tomorrow) and on Tuesday she is going to stay with a friend, and in ten days' time we are taking another friend of hers with us to England for three days/nights. So it's all go on the sleepover front round here - they have a fantastic time and it is brilliant for their independence.

firstsupermum · 28/05/2011 21:34

i will never allow my DS to sleep anywhere without me at that age. he is very young for it.
i think i may be over protective.

Booandpops · 28/05/2011 21:34

Yanu. My dd 5 was invited to a party sleepover and she had not even had tea at the Childs house. I said no. She was upset but so be it. Plenty of time for all that. Both my two have stayed at gps but that entirely different IMO.

lesley33 · 28/05/2011 22:01

I think if your child wants to go, he isn't too young. Although I would want the parent to promise to ring me - even in the middle of the night - if he was unhappy so I can collect him. As long as I knew I could collect him if need be, then I think thats fine.

FabbyChic · 28/05/2011 22:02

My 5 year old had a friend sleepover at that age.

SarahStratton · 28/05/2011 22:33

Mine used to sleepover with next doors DDs at four. They were all very close and most weekends they just moved as a small herd between our 2 houses. They loved it.

ChippingIn · 28/05/2011 22:38

We had nursery friends (3.5 yrs) sleep over - they loved it :) Our sleep suffered somewhat, but hey... it's only one night (at a time).

ReindeerBollocks · 28/05/2011 22:46

YANBU, DS is 6 and isn't allowed on sleepovers for a while yet.

He does sleep at my mothers house but she is adequately prepared for DS!

Personally I'd see how the child reacts to the situation, rather than imposing a time limit (another poster made this suggestion). He may love the idea and be fine, or you may get a call in the night.

fivegomadindorset · 28/05/2011 22:47

My friend acouple of weekends ago to my DS nearly 3 for the night, he loved it, both children slept well and late for them in the morning.