to ask if you use state or private education

[manicinsomniac]

Sorry, I know it's a little rude and personal but I only ask because I think that only 7-8% of the children in the UK are privately educated yet on mumsnet it seems to be massively higher than that which I find interesting.

So, if I'm not being too unreasonable to ask, do/did/will you use private or state education for your child/ren?

for the last time, I was saying that generalisations get made about state schools (cf. Maypole), and that seems to carry more validity for some reason.

For me to say everyone wears Jack Wills at private school (or is arrogant, or whatever) is only the same as someone else saying that kids at state school don't get taught properly, or suffer from disruption, or get knifed, or whatever!

My ds is at state school and a more jumped up self obsessed spoilt bunch of poshos you could never meet

Joan I had a mother like you who felt the principle of me going to a sink school was more important than having a good education

As a result I stubbled with my spelling and English all my life also my maths wich I had little of as my maths teacher spent the first half hour at battle stations.

We were required to do home work but the etchers gave up after year 7 and we never had any from then on.

I however recognise my educational failings so have employed a private tutor for my lo and put our family in a position were my lo can go to a outstanding school, also made sure my lo is exposed to art , books, travel
And make sure that we take Los education very seriously

I will not gamble with my Childs education because of some misguided notion

I am very lucky my job involves minimal paperwork and is practical and am also very lucky my oh is in a very job job and is much brighter than me has two degrees and is currently doing a masters

I have worked in a private school. There are some parents who don't give a monkeys about their childrens education in them as well. I have seen parents always drop off kids off well after school has started because they cannot get up. I have seen kids who never do their homework. as they are too busy I have known parents who send nannies that barely speak any english to parents evenings. Amongst other things. These parents seem to think this is OK as they are "paying" They are usually the first to complain when the child doesn't make the grade. I think there are parents in all schools that don't care.

Let's face it - most of us are on here because we do care about our kids. Not to say that everyone who is not on here doesn't, obviously (please don't jump on me saying that!) but I doubt many would join up to a site primarily about children and their well being if they didn't care, in the slightest way, about their kids. This is why we don't have any "chavs" on here saying that their little darling went to the local state, traded in drugs at playtime/got caught shoplifting at 14/saw his best made get stabbed at 16 etc etc.
Yes, things like this happen at private/independent schools but I think we can safely say that the majority of incidents that make the news involving teenagers weren't kids who's parents joined debates such as this one...

I have only ever referred to ONE state school on this thread, certainly no sweeping statements putting all state schools in same bracket,just as one cannot do that for independent schools. There are good and bad in both.

Maypole. I can state with some certainty that I am not like your mother.

FAB - good post!

fab - you are right.

There are over 60,000 children in the care system in the UK.
There are thousands more who ought to be.
There are thousands of children living below the poverty line.
There are thousands of children wihtout a proper home.
There are thousands of children who cannot read or write.
There are thousands of children who simply stop attending school.

These are the children who we should worry about. These are the children who we should spend energy and time trying to help.

And trust me, closing every priavate school in the world is not going to help these children.

My point being that we're not exactly a fair representative of the Country.
You have to bear in mind that whatever school your kid goes to there will be parents who don't give a monkeys and whatever damage that does to their DC's may well rub off on yours, being in proximity.
The environment the DC's are in has to bear some relevance. Personally i'd rather take my chances with a Grammar (probably misguided belief that kids doing well enough to gain entry must have fairly supportive parents) or failing that a fee paying school - i'd rather the kids who's parents didn't give a monkeys and had sent them to boarding school have handed over parenting to someone far better qualified. A the very least if the poor DC of a non-caring home was a day pupil, they get the chance to do extra curricular activities/extra prep every night of the week in a safe environment with their friends while their uncaring parent does extra hours or whatever with their time.

Joan thats not what I said my son will be attending a state secondary but it. Is outstanding and will be supplemented by. Private tutor

The majority of state schools are not outstanding and the majority of children are NOT taught well

Look at the amount of 11 year olds unable to read when leaving primary school compared to the amour of children who leave private education primary unable to read

Private schools have more freedom to sack bad teachers.
They have more freedom to hire whom they wish, they also have more freedom to discipline children how they feel I very much doubt a teacher in a private school would be sacked for moving a child from the playground when refusing to do as they are told.

I cannot believe you actually think a education from waterloo high hs the same value of an education from eaton

Just like the uni of kiddemister is not worth the same as a uni education from UCl their just not the duration and standard of teaching is just better even with my low education I know that

You are so right Nodders, I know a fair few of em too :)

Yes, an education at a fictional school is not the same as at a school which doesn't exist, that's certainly true.

An A grade is an A grade, though.

TBH, I feel narked that I can't afford to pay for an education where my children can be in a class size of 10 with excellent facilities. That pisses me off because I want the best for them.

As it is, there is no way in the world we will ever be able to afford it but we are lucky enough to live in an area where the state schools (at present, at least) are really quite good. Not outstanding but good enough. As parents, we will always be involved as much as we can in their education and both children are reasonably able academically (one I would describe as very able) so I think they will do all right at state school, as their father and I did.

And sometimes, people can beat all the odds. A friend of mine at (state) school had zero parental involvement. In fact, her parents were ogres. Luckily she was bloody brainy and worked hard in her efforts to get away from the lifestyle she'd been brought up in. She has done extremely well for herself in life.

If you can afford private education then I would think its a no brainer as kids who are privately educated are far more likely to receive a higher educational attainment and so will have a considerable head start over other their peers which will benefit them later in life.

Depends on whether you believe in equality of opportunity, I guess.

Private schools also have the freedom to employ unqualified teachers, as well as sack bad ones. BTW they rarely sack the bad ones.

I am taking my DD out of state comp, to go to private (yr 9). Not because the school is bad, or a crack den etc. but because it does not cater for my dd's needs. DS will be starting there (state) in Sept. and I am hoping he will thrive there. Education isn't a one size fits all scenario, you do what is best for your child. I couldn't give a monkeys arse whether someone judges me as being a snob, elitist or whatever for making an informed decision about my DC's education.

olifin it's fine to feel narked about things we can't give our children. Perfectly natural, I think.

I ofen look at children with their grandparents and wish my children had that opportunity - but we live too far away so visits, though precious, are infrequent...

What's important is for it not to become corrsoive iyswim. To focus on what we do give our children. To ask ourselves whther there are things in our power that we can do for them.

I know the private schools are better.
I know my child would recieve a better education.

BUT, I know lots of people who can't afford private schools round here. (London) They are motivated, caring, lovely. They have the highest expectations for their children. A school is a sum of its parts, of its pupils and their parents. Why would I think, or have the arrogance to, opt out? Why would I say, my little darling is more important than yours, and not support a local school which has a mixed intake.

To me, it is a bit like choosing which geographical area you live in. Notting Hill is infinitely more lovely than many other areas of London. I grew up there. That is not to say I can't NOW manage very happily in other, less beauteous, districts which have the charms of lovely people and a lovely community. Yet there are people who might say they could never possibly leave Notting Hill and hang on when they can ill afford it, for some perceived advantage in shopping/transport/scenery. Sometimes you just have to make the decision that you can be happy and you don't need the DELUXE model. Things will work out. There IS only your local community.

Add message | Report | Message poster JoanofArgos Tue 24-May-11 11:45:23
Yes, an education at a fictional school is not the same as at a school which doesn't exist, that's certainly true.

An A grade is an A grade, though.

really I think you will find a grade a from eaton is not the same as a garde a from the local comp any employer and uni will tell you that its well know that

A fist from cambride is not the same as a first from the unvistery of kidder mister

And is seems this is the difference beween parents who are for or agaisnt prvate schools the parents who are pro realise his and the parents who are against are in denial and its that very denial that leads so many state schools to do so bad

receive!

How will it be funded neverforget?

Very true wordfactory

But maypole, in the case of GCSEs, at least, an A grade is an A grade. There is no difference between the exam papers that are given out to the students, unless there is some elitist exam board I have never heard of