Worried about swinging neighbours kids

[taylor74]

My next door neighbours who I have know for 2 yrs are swingers.It does not bother me what they do,its their life,what concerns me as a parent is the fact they have 2 kids a 9 and a 11 yr old. The other night she popped round to see if I could look after them as she had "friends" over. I said no as my DD was at her nans so me and DH was going to have a meal out.
The next day I asked if she found a sitter,she said no,I said well you can always rearrange another night to play,she said "Oh I played,just put the kids upstairs while I entertained" I was in shock,these men are strangers that come to her home,they could be anyone. I know we all need time out and a sex life but she was putting her needs before her kids.
AIBU

Oh my, I'm morally outraged like a DM reader.

Please say this isn't real, OP.

That's adults as opposed to teens btw.

What time of evening was this?

Well if they have kids who sneak down, no doubt they have a lock on the door? And as for noisy sex...how do we know it's noisy? The kids may hear nothing over the music or whatever.

All I'm saying is, there's no need to assume the kids would think anything other than their parents are having a normal party.

Must have been a crap party having to be quiet cos the 'kids are sleeping upstairs'.

How do you know they are strangers? Most swingers seem to be wary and picky on whom they play with.

Sounds like the swinging is taking priority over the kids.

'If they're having a gang bang in the living room - the kids are going to know about it'

I wonder what mental images we are all conjoring up..
In my head, these 'swingers' were sitting down to supper, soft lighting, wine, and drifting off to do their thing as the evening went on.
Gang-bangs in the living room suggests something rather more lively..
(actually I thought that phrase meant something else entirely, but I'm afraid to google it )

worral Perhaps they roll out the "special" sex for guests?

You know how it is, one friend around for coffee/sex with your partner - quite subdued, maybe a giggle, 2 friends around for coffee/another couple for sex = swinging from the chandeliers blowing a bagpipe and tootin' a horn from betwixt your buttocks whilst wearing a pink-sequined cowboy hat which sings "Jingle Bells"... all whilst the warm spring air blows through the pampass grass and through the (non-netted) open window.

I'm thinking if the OP was going out to dinner around the same time, it can't have been that late. The 11 year old wouldn't have wanted to go to bed much before 10pm.

How selfish, shoving them out of the family room so that they can have sex with other people.

fine if kids out, selfish if in.
my teenage bf never got over hearing his mum shagging some one night stand she had pulled and that was a one off. He was 10 at the time.

I'm picturing lava lamps, cheese and pineapple on sticks and Barry White on the stereo.

15 minutes of polite chit chat, then Brian says 'right, let's get down to it shall we?' - and strips off. Marjorie undresses to reveal her nipple tassles and scarlet coloured thong.
Pauline refreshes glasses with Mateus Rose while Brian gives Marjorie one over the edge of the three piece....

Nancy - your version has a certain retro appeal.
An 'Abigails Party' kind of vibe
I would obvioulsy be a rubbish swinger, lacking in imagination as I am..

I'd never get away with it anyway, my neighbours look at me funny if I leave the washing on the line overnight.

I'm trying not to conjour up any images tbh.

Each to their own and all that, but in an house with children upstairs - it's grim.

I'm rather hoping that they cancelled the afterdinner exertions when they failed to secure a babysitter, and made do with coffee, After Eights and idle chitchat.

Kids should not be in just in case. More than likely the DC will stay in bed but if they didn't it would be scarring. Equally, it can be total strangers involved so there is a danger there - I wouldn't invite any sttangers into my home now (although I did happily pre-DC). Agree with OP - no sitter, no swinging.

More importantly did you work out they were swingers by the pampas grass in the garden?!

Swingers next door??

Love it!!

I cant believe anybody thinks this is ok!!

OP, im with you. these people could be anyone, its selfish and innapropriate.

What lovely morals they are teaching their children.

Can all the people who are wildly against the idea of swinging please describe the location and volumes of their sex-life?

I am not against swinging - just swinging with DC in the same house. Don't get what your question is about though alpine!? Are you suggesting swingers have more sex in different locations?

A sex life is different between the parents than between the parents and God knows who. If you want to have random people into your house to get their end away then send your kids elsewhere.

Alpine why would that be relevant? Are all non swingers who actually respect their marriage vows and their childrens best interest boring prudes?!

DoMe - I am suggesting that it's ludicrous (from my pov) to get your knickers in a twist about adults having sex - presumably the children are not present when the "mummy & daddy who love each other very much" are at it?

Does everyone on this thread getting "upset" and wringing their hands ineffectually also disallow alcohol or drunkenness in the house? Nope, thought not.

Nothing against swinging if that's your thing - but not when children are around.

If a dc walks in on his parents having sex that's easily explained. But how do you explain why Mum's being taken from behind by a strange man or Dad's going down on Trace down the road (the one with the vertical blinds)?

I'm wildly against swinging where children of 9 and 11 might hear.

Let's introduce them to sex gradually eh?

At an age-appropriate level - perhaps with avoiding abusing them sexually by having them wander in to 69's at a dinner party when they're looking for a drink of water

I agree with AlpinePony. And I think the 'respect their marriage vows' crap is ridiculous. There is no disrespect to marriage vows (who knew they had feelings, anyway?) if everyone involved is consenting and wants to do it.

But that's not the point. The point is what Alpine said.

Does everyone on this thread getting "upset" and wringing their hands ineffectually also disallow alcohol or drunkenness in the house? Nope, thought not

Yup - you thought right.

Moderate boozing a bit of pissedness is tolerable. Swinging is not - why do you think it is?