to be unable to live with a msbp accusation?

[munchausens]

Has anyone ever been falsely accused of munchausens syndrome by proxy or more commonly called fabricated illness syndrome now?

If so how do you live with it or recover from it? Has anyone been aware of this accusation and managed to clear their name? In particular anyone who has been accused of it for complaining about a misdiagnosis and challenging the professionals. How can you defend yourself as everything seems to make it worse as all defence makes one closer to the classic profile of the msbp mother!

I am scared to take my children to the doctor and petrified they might get injured. Yesterday I dropped the glass bottle containing my sons prescription and now have to ask for a new prescription so I have been distraught since for fear I am accused of overdosing him. We are not at a situation where the children have been put on an at risk register or any attempt has been made to take them but we just live in fear that this is being considered or that something could trigger this at any time.

For anyone who thinks it could never happen to them or there is no smoke without fire well I was totally the same and really believed this type of thing could never happen to a professional family living an extremely privileged life in a loving 2 parent family. Now I just think if someone like Sally Clark couldnt defend herself despite being a solicitor how can we.

If anyone has been in this situation and is able to offer advice or can point me in an appropriate direction for help I would really appreciate it.

Still, I'm very shocked at this munchausen. They've started a bloody witch hunt by the sounds of it and you're the one they want to burn. I'm sorry this is happening to you sad

sorry but how can you come to that definitive conclusion based on a handful of posts, which may or may not be accurate, and knowing absolutely nothing of the true facts????

wow OP.......sounds like a very frightening situation.

I do think there must be more to it though (I'm not saying i don't believe you). What are the illnesses that you're supposed to have caused in your children? You mentioned glue ear, but the doctor's can't possibly be suggesting that you somehow caused that to gain attention?

That's why I said it 'sounds like'. Of course I can't be definitive here, but having been on the end of such a witch hunt, it's quite easy to be biased against the people who are the ones doing the accusing.

sephrenia - unfortunately there is a clause in the freedom of information act that means they should not supply the records if the information may cause someone to harm themselves or someone else. The legal advice i have is that this will apply to msbp. Scary thought when trying to defend oneself!

My husband will apply for our sons records and hopefully that will be accepted but not sure if I will be able to see mine in full or if it will be obvious what has been removed.

I didn't know about that clause in the FOIA. I thought that you were allowed to access any information about yourself. I can see why the clause is in there, but what a pain in the behind.

Did you see the documentary on TV the other night OP?

valiumredhead - yes it was horrendous. Those poor mothers still totally affected by it all 20 years later. Did you see it?

Im not sure if this should be posted here.

Reason being, I dont know if you do have munchausen , or not.

Its unclear if your being accused/been accused, or if its just you thinking you are.

Im not going to get involved in a witch hunt against CSC and wrong doings of doctors, as we dont know if they are wrong.

I find it uneasy that people may be giving out their own personal situations, which you might use as a firing trigger or an answer to your problems if you do have the illness.

Im not saying you have OP, but some things should be kept to the lawyers offices.
Sorry.

I'm confused.......have you applied for copies of your medical records and been refused?

The "reports" you mentioned in your earlier post......who were they made by?

Yes I did see it.

Who has accused you and of what OP? From what you have posted you sound very upset and anxious but not a lot of it makes much sense ( either that or I am being very thick today)

Assesments before counselling are very common by the way.

This is only my opinion, and I am sorry if I hurt/offend you OP, but I have to say I agree with GoFullForce's post.

This is such a sensitive topic, and potentially damaging, I do feel you should warn people replying that they should bear in mind divulging possibly sensitive information on-line, and to strangers, is risky.

I can see that legal advice etc., support might be wanted and helpful but it also carries its own risks.

Are there no off-line support systems?

This is, of course, only my opinion, and is meant in no way to undermine any woman going through a situation such as this.

You are absolutely right it is not an ideal place to post because I was bound to be judged and I knew that but I understood it was the area with the most views and it has got me in contact with a couple of people who have been in or are in a similar situation and that is what I need to get through this so it has been well worth it. Thank you so much to those people who have been supportive and offered help I really appreciate it so much.

All I was asking for in my original post was advice from anyone who had been through this as I am finding it impossible to cope with the accusations. I have never been in contact with anyone who has been through this and I need to know that you can get through it and that life can go on. All the legal advice is extremely negative and whilst I know I need legal help and will continue to use them I also need help to cope outside of the lawyers office too. I need to know how to cope on a day to day basis with examples such as the broken bottle which lawyers will not understand but a mother who has been in the same situation will.

Gofullforce ? please dont judge the type of help I need to cope and try to stop anyone kind enough to offer it as I am desperate or I would not be here. Surely it cannot be right to suggest I cannot ask for help because I might be guilty. Does innocent until proven guilty not apply to mumsnet?

I had tried to find offline support or any relevant support and had been unable to find anything. The only help available appears to be for those whose children have been taken. Unfortunately I am unable to post full details on an open forum on a case that is still ongoing but I am not asking anyone to judge my guilt or otherwise and my post was not about that. I am not asking for a witch hunt and of course you dont know if there was a misdiagnosis or not. Even with the full details no one should judge anyone guilty without meeting the family hence my outrage when professionals do this. I dont think you need to worry if I have msbp or not if you have not been in this situation as I am only asking for help from people that have. If you cant be supportive why not give someone the benefit of doubt and just dont reply.

For anyone who has been accused of this and is happy to talk to me and advise me on how to get through it then they can make their own mind up about how much advice to give when they talk to me and they dont need to give me their location or any details of their own situation. I have no idea how it could be used as a firing trigger but it is scary that this can be considered but I guess there are some very suspicious people on mumsnet even to thinking medicine does not come in glass bottles.

Whatever I post I am sure most people will still think no smoke without fire and if I am being totally honest I would have always thought the same. I would never have believed this could happen to us a secure 2 parent family leading a very comfortable and happy life in a £m house with the most wanted children ever and our just wanting the very best for them. I have never drunk, smoked, taken drugs, had any depression or mental illness and chose to give up a career to be at SAHM which I love. I am sure I am not the only one who stereotyped the type of people it would happen to despite knowing of famous cases such as Sally Clarks. It has certainly changed my outlook on everything and I feel guilty for having been so judgemental. I feel like it will have changed everything for ever.

Fair post, Op. You seem desperate and I hope that you have been able to find some strength from others on this thread. I agree that you are innocent until proven guilty. I would stress again that you stay close to your solicitor. Maybe change firms if you are not confident in the quality of the advice you have been given. Maybe consider asking your mother/father to move in for a while to support you through this? Every day interaction, distraction and love might help you to push the anxious thoughts to the back of your mind.

Have you considered the possibility that you might actually have MSBP? The medical profession are there to protect your children. You only post your side of the story but there are a lot of things you have said from your posts that would be enough to make them suspicious and they have a duty to investigate.

I'm really sorry you're going through this. I don't really feel I have much to add to the advice here, other than to let you know I've been through similar.

I've found exactly the same in paperwork relating to DH and I - meetings recorded as though he either simply wasn't there or never spoke.

Still, though, I think sticking together is a wise strategy. At least they're leaving him out of the witchunt, and thus implying the DCs have at least one good parent. Whereas it is still all horrific for you, it bodes well for any legal action which SS may take.

Really? NEVER? That's pretty unusual, I would have thought. Not impossible, of course, but unusual.

I don't know, OP. All your information is just so.... bitty. I can't make a proper picture out of all this, it's too disjointed. I understand that it's difficult to explain properly in case you're recognised, but I feel there's an awful lot you're not telling us. That's not to say that I think you're lying - just that I find it impossible to comment when we're clearly not getting the full story.

I have reported your post TAOB as you dont have the right to post that kind of info without the persons permission

Eh? It's a public web page and presumably has been put there to advertise her services.

You dont have the moral right. I would be bloody fuming if you posted that kind of information about me without my permission.

Has she given you her permission? If not then dont you think that you may be compromising her professionally as well as personally? What gives you the right to do that?

Yes Daisy I see that, but your point is that it is there to advertise her services, and I agree that it is. It does not appear to be there to "out" someones personal problems and link them to her professional life when there is absolutely no connection between the 2.

My apologies TAOB, I think I have made amistake in thinking that you have outed the OP, however if you are advising her of lawyers that could help her then I am sorry, I clearly got the wrong end of the stick.