He is only 8 - as is my ds. They are friends in school but have an uneasy friendship. I am a SAHM and his mum works so every few weeks I look after the boy so she can attend a meeting/training etc.
Over a period of 9 months the boy has been really horrible to my ds, who has SEN. My son's SEN mean he is frustrating to deal with and he is at least 1-2 years behind academically. When I have looked after him (sometimes over night) so his mum can do the odd late night for work, he speaks to my ds with utter contempt, regularly saying how much better he is at everything than my ds. He is also rude to me.
About 6 months ago he attacked my ds in the lunch queue (biting, hitting, kicking) Both his parents and I were called in. The boy was sent home for the rest of the day, and I had to try and calm my ds down (he becomes hysterical, which is part of his SEN). The mum was so apologetic and was really upset so I said, never mind, lets just move on.
Things came to a head about 3 months ago when he made all 3 of my dc cry when he came over. In fact he nearly made me cry as he was so horrible - I can't say what he said as I don't want anyone to recognise me on here.
I know I should have spoken to his mother about her son's behaviour but I just can't. It would be really really difficult.
Instead I went to the school, who although can't do anything about out of school incidents, they said that he have seen the boy be nasty to my ds in school a few times. Whilst they didn't say so, I think that the boy is nasty to other children as well. The school decided that this boy's behaviour was an issue generally and they would watch him.
I heard no more about it, but decided to keep the boy at very long arms length.
2 nights ago the mum asked me if she could speak to me about her ds. Deep breath in! She wanted advice! She said that there is now a daily communication between the school and her about her ds behaviour. She said she didn't like the teacher and felt she was picking on her ds. I said nothing. She said she had gone to the head to complain but the head had said that the teacher was really experienced and that her ds' behaviour did require alteration because he was upsetting a few of his friends.
I realise this was my prime opportunity to say, yes I know, he has done it to my ds, but I bottled it again. I also think I have let things go for so long that for me to list all that her ds has done/said, she would be really angry at me for not telling her.
Today, my ds came home and said that the boy had hit him again in the playground and the boy had been given a 10 minute detention, again.