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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell DH I am getting a cat no matter what he says?

84 replies

MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 10:13

We have 2 DC....aged 3 and 6. Both DH and I love all animals...he especially likes dogs and I have always said I wanted a cat before we got a dog as it works best that way. He has remained ambivelant about it.

Now I have the chance to rescue a beautiful Siamese...he is putting up barriers.

He says the cat will fight with the neighbours cats and it will leave hair everywhere....wtf? Cats and dogs DO leave hair in places and this is part of having a pet.......I just told him that this is something I have always wanted and that I want to get the cat.

He says "No, no...I'll find you a nice dog...don't get the cat"

I can't see why he's doing this? We often look around for suitable dogs and have not yet found the right one for us....but I have found the right cat....why is he being a pain? I have told him I AM going to see the cat today and that if I like it I will tell them that I want it.

Arse! I am an adult, I had no present for MOthers day or my Birthday and I think he needs to let me get the cat. I have also agreed not to have any more DC....even though I would like three....he doesn't feel he can cope with another child so fine! I'm getting a cat.

Angry
OP posts:
maxybrown · 13/05/2011 10:36

How foolish of him to think a dog would be more important if a cat is in the house - no matter which comes first Grin the cat especailly a siamese, will tell the dog what's what! And cats ARE far easier to care for than dogs. Any animal is a responsibility, but dogs really so. We had a siames from a rescue, she was gorgeous, loved her!

strawberrymewmew · 13/05/2011 10:36

My DP tried exactly the same thing, even with the tying to convince me to get a dog instead. I got the cat and now he loves it. :)

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 13/05/2011 10:36

YWBU to get the cat regardless. Talk about it a bit more, and try to convince him. It seems rather daft to be falling out over a cat. That said, DH finally agreed to a cat a few years back. It was in the house 24 hours before DH needed medical treatment. So now we have many, many chickens.

maxybrown · 13/05/2011 10:36

sorry bad spellings Blush

LooloosMummy · 13/05/2011 10:37

agree with issey6cats my 3 hardly leave any hair, i have 1 bengal, 1 BSH and 1 domestic tabby the only place i find cat hair is when they decided to sleep on my jumpers

FabbyChic · 13/05/2011 10:37

Cats are actually boring, they don't learn and never do anything.

Dogs become part of the family and adapt, they respond whereas a cat only responds to food.

I do think that if your DH is against it you should not go against his wishes.

maxybrown · 13/05/2011 10:38

Siamese are rarely boring!

scotsgirl23 · 13/05/2011 10:38

You are so wrong on the front FabbyChic. Siamese in particular are a highly intelligent breed, but cats can and do learn, and respond to far more than food. Two of mine play fetch!

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 10:39

Fabby Siamese can do ALL knds of things and NO cat is boring. Their personality's transcend obedience and shoe fetching.

OP posts:
issey6cats · 13/05/2011 10:44

cats are so not boring my lot have us in stitches with some of thier antics especially when they decide to behave like kids and go on a rampage up and down the stairs they go up in one order and come down in another order, then theres the pecking order for the best chair in the house, the one who gets her own way and the boys move if she says so, watching them run riot in the garden, and glad to hear he is good with kids my siamese cross loves my grandchildren when they visit, and owning a pet does enhance childrens understanding of the needs of animals, we have had cats and dogs all my life, my kids were brought up with cats, dogs, hamsters, rabbits, pet rats and all of them have cats and dogs of thier own now and y grandchildren will probably follow siut when they grow up

LooloosMummy · 13/05/2011 10:49

issey i'm taking over a bit here, my son want a hamster and i keep saying no fearing the cats will eat it, how did you over come this problem?

bruffin · 13/05/2011 10:51

"Cats are actually boring, they don't learn and never do anything.

Dogs become part of the family and adapt, they respond whereas a cat only responds to food."

I have come to the conclusion that a dog is like having another toddler and a cat is like having a fairly well behaved teenager.

issey6cats · 13/05/2011 10:52

just make sure that the cage is one that the cats cant get into, and when he has the hamster out for handling make sure the cats arnt in the same room, we had two pet rats once and the cat used to sit on the windowsill when we had the rats out, we just used to keep one eye open on the cat and when she started showing a bit too much interest in the rats we put them back in thier cage

ScousyFogarty · 13/05/2011 10:53

My neighbour has cats. They visit me. I like the cat personality. But I gather gardeners have problems. wehad Cassie cat for 17 years. He died , we decided not to replace him. We still think of him at times and his funny ways.

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 10:55

Like LooLoo I am a bit worried about our goldfish....will the cat plan on having it for a snack as soon as possible?

OP posts:
bruffin · 13/05/2011 10:56

and my cat is better at playing fetch than the beautifully trained labrador we looked after for the weekend. She also chases her tail.

issey6cats · 13/05/2011 10:58

just put a top on the bowl/tank so the cat cant get his paws into it, he will probably watch the fish but cats aint keen on water so if he does get his paw in once he wont like the cold wet feel and probs wont do it twice

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 11:00

There is a lid on it but I can imagine a cat inserting one claw to lever it open....Hmm I know what they're like! Maybe I will have to weight it.

DH just said "If you feel that strongly about the cat then get it....but I won't be cleaning it's crappy tray."

Ha! I knew he'd cave....he's just being the responsible adult I think and making sure that have thought about it.

OP posts:
issey6cats · 13/05/2011 11:05

one suggestion for the litter tray get the wood pellet based litter as it dosent go like concrete in the tray like the clay based ones breaks down to like sawdust and smels decent when you change it it is more expensive but well worth it he will love the cat he soundsgeorgous and im jealous i so want a full siamese but 6 is more than enough

cassierosse · 13/05/2011 11:05

YANBU.

Get the cat ! Get the cat !

Example :

My DH was adamant we would only ever have 1 dog. We have had lots of different pets over the years but currently we have :

2 dogs
3 cats
1 hamster

DD would love a puppy for her birthday and he has said NO.

However, MY birthday is a week later, and seeing as I NEVER have anything usually, when he asked me what I wanted, guess what I asked for ?

Just got to find one. Grin

And the no is becoming weaker and quieter !

cassierosse · 13/05/2011 11:06

Mumbling

Yay ! He's caved !

Just gotta know how to break 'em down ! Smile

Finallyspring · 13/05/2011 11:12

Exactly the same thing happened with me and DH. I went ahead and got the cat. The good thing is that he grew to really love her but the downside is that I have to do EVERYTHING related to her. Feeding, vet, taking to cattery etc.

LooloosMummy · 13/05/2011 11:15

woohoo yey to cat, knew he'd give in if he was a pet lover too, men just like to say no 'cos they feel they can!

thanks for the advice on the hamster issey
and also mumbling we have fish, cats so far haven't got in and eaten them although the advert with the cats with oposable thumbs does slightly freak me out...

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 13/05/2011 11:40

I'm ashamed to admit this but I cried slghtly. Blush Grin Ah well....cattery here we cooooomeeeee!

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 13/05/2011 12:06

Ds wanted a hamster, dh said a resounding NO as he doesn't like them!

I got one anyway BUT I would never do that with an animal that wasn't caged, I am desperate for a dog but dh really hates dogs in the house so I would never get one unless we had proper outside space for it, like an outhouse or something........