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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to let my Reception-aged DS walk to breakfast club from the school gate by himself?

34 replies

ceebeegeebies · 13/05/2011 08:41

Breakfast club is right round the back of the school so a fair walk from the school gate and you can't see the door from the pavement...DS1 is in Reception (but young - July-born) and I have always walked him round to the door.

The last couple of days I have seen him to the gate and let him walk by himself - although I do stand on the pavement and watch him until he disappears from view.

Not sure if this is ok or not - other parents do it but I know this doesn't make it right but it is a bit of a bind walking all the way round the back to literally say goodbye to him and then walk all the way back to the car.

OP posts:
gkys · 13/05/2011 08:48

that depends if you are ok with it or not? and if your ds is ok with it. I wouldn't do it, I take mine in everyday, but am on maternity leave at tthe moment, and work nights when I am working, so I have the time to do, I realise that I am lucky. I love the playgrounf banter too, we offen end up chattering long after the children have gone in

redskyatnight · 13/05/2011 08:52

DC's school would not let a Reception child come in by themselves. They insist the child has to be brought (at least) to the door and handed over. Evidently this is not the case at your school however. My main concern would be a worry that "something" might have happened that meant breakfast club wasn't running that day. Would your DS have the nous to come straight back to you (before you disappeared) or would he potentially stand by the door not knowing what to do?

Original poster
ceebeegeebies · 13/05/2011 08:52

Gyks I see what you mean but because it is breakfast club (not the official start of the school day iyswim) parents literally drop the kids off and go so no other parents to chat to - I do drop him off at school start time for 2 days and I, like you, love chatting with the other parents whilst we wait for the teacher to open the gate Smile

DS1 wants to do it and I am (pretty much) ok with it but just slightly uncomfortable but think I may be being too precious about it - seriously what harm can come to him walking round 2 corners of the building??

OP posts:
Original poster
ceebeegeebies · 13/05/2011 08:54

Redsky I hadn't considered that possibility tbh - not sure what DS1 would do if it wasn't open (is that ever likely to happen??) but there would be a whole host of children in the same situation (not many parents do actually walk them to the door).

I always assumed that the school would insist on an 'official' handover but obviously not....

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 13/05/2011 08:54

No, at that age they need to be seen into the class room. At ds's primary parents weren't allowed to do what you are describing OP.

magicmelons · 13/05/2011 08:58

The rules at our school say no, only you know your child it does seem a little young. I'm pretty relaxed and have been trying to encourage dd who is 6 to do little things on her own, ds who is 3 now is so flighty and easily distracted i'm not sure i'll even be able to send him to university alone.

magicmelons · 13/05/2011 09:00

Could you wait for an older child to take him in that way he would feel like he was being independent.

pickyourbrain · 13/05/2011 09:04

I'm usually the first to come on to these kinds of threads and say that peple are too precious and yes it's fine to do X, Y, Z but I really feel in this case it's not okay.

1, It could be closed. Even if there was a group of kids locked out, they proably wouldnt have a phone to let any one know.
2, We have an issue at our school with local yobs coming in over night and vandalising. What if a particular nasty was lurking around the corner for your child to find. (we once had a fox's head placed in the playground Confused )
3, They could have a fall

CurrySpice · 13/05/2011 09:11

Sorry to be dim but is he on school premesis the whole time?

I think the "it might be cancelled" thing is slightly spurious because he wouldn't be the only one there would he?

Also, "there might be s fox's head round the corner" thing is s bit silly too tbh.

Having said all that, Im not sure I would be happy if it is quite a long way round or if he's easily distracted

And btw I wish my school did breakfast club (a propos of nothing!)

fairydoll · 13/05/2011 09:12

If it was the start of school-no problem at all.But I think b/fast club is different.Much fewer staff and chance of them going down with food poisoning or something.I think you should see him go in the door.

diddl · 13/05/2011 09:15

If it was cancelled, wouldn´t there be a note on the school gate?

pickyourbrain · 13/05/2011 09:32

curryspice It happened here!

What's the big deal anyway, does it take that long to just walk him round?

Bluebell99 · 13/05/2011 09:39

You should walk him round. Surely you need to hand him over into their responsibility.

JeremyKylesPetProject · 13/05/2011 10:09

They don't let any infant children do that in our school never mind reception age. Its a fair old trek from the gate to the class room but as I'm not in a rush I might offer to walk other kids in for the rushing-off-to-work parents. They usually accept gratefully.

CurrySpice · 13/05/2011 13:06

pickyourbrain I'm sure it did but making decisions based on the possibility that there might be something yukky round the corner seems a bit odd

valiumredhead · 13/05/2011 13:08

There often IS something yukky round the corner in most playgrounds ime.......

pickyourbrain · 13/05/2011 13:13

Well i listed three things that would sway my decision no tto do this. So that is not all I am basing my opinion on. However, seeing as that happened in my school playground.. and things like that often happen, I personally wouldnt allow my 4 year old to walk around the school on he rown that early in the morning.

CurrySpice · 13/05/2011 13:18

I said I wouldn't either if you read back. I wouldn't base it on the possibility of a severed head though!! I would do it, to be honest, Because I would like to.

In my 7 years of school runs so far. I have yet to encounter any random body parts! Wink I still walk the DDs to the school gate though, because I enjoy it and so do they

valiumredhead · 13/05/2011 13:34

Fox shit EVERYWHERE

Dead squirrel with guts out everywhere... blerk!

Classroom door shut and teacher not in

Falling over en route to class room

Ds forgetting to tell me something and running back to find me

Big wasp nest and the school being closed suddenly as the wasps got VERY angry

I'm sure I can think of more things we've been through! Delivering child to the door is the best option imo! Grin

BelieveInPink · 13/05/2011 14:17

I have only ever done it if another parent happens to be going in with their child. And I can see the door she has to go through.

However, I don't do it as a rule only because there is another door past the main door that L has to knock on as it's a security door (need a fob to open it) and sometimes the teacher is off seeing to other children and I wouldn't like to think of L just standing there. She is 7 though so has the sense to wait and not go wandering out of the premises.

So err, yeah. I just bored myself to tears with my own post. :o

CurrySpice · 13/05/2011 14:43

Blimey valiumhead that sounds more like i'm a celebrity than the school run Wink :o

valiumredhead · 13/05/2011 14:46

Yeah, it's the country - stuff happens in the country! Grin

CurrySpice · 13/05/2011 14:49

Yeah, kids don't forget things, or fall over, or have ill teachers, or step in animal shit in towns Hmm

PatriciaHolm · 13/05/2011 14:58

We had a dying deer in the playground the other day Sad

Anyway, I wouldn't; we wouldn't be allowed in our school anyway, we have to drop them off. Whose responsibility would it be if something did happen? (unlikely as it is) If it's on school premises but you were supposed to be in charge?

pickyourbrain · 13/05/2011 15:11

It's the kind of wierd shit that happens all the time is life that a 4 year old isn't equiped to deal with by themself.

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