To wish that schools wouldn't reward children for things they have no control over

[dealer]

Attendance, they give out certificates for 100% attendance each half term. Ds would occasionally have a day off for illness, dd1 hasn't had a day off since reception, she's in year 4. Ds wasn't assed, dd1 has mild sn and despite the fact that I tell her that she's really lucky to be so healthy, loves getting up in assembly for the certificates and feels it's an achievement.

They've now changed it, since it wasn't 'fair' and you will now only get a certificate for most improved attendance. Dd1 wants to know how to get one of these. Not sure how you improve on 5 years 100%.

And I hate it when they award class attendance, so the poor kid who has genuine health problems or parents who aren't very good at getting them there, get highlighted as bringing the class percentage down.

Walk to school week soon. We used to walk to school all the time when I was a sahm because we live 10 mins from the school. Now though, I work as a delivery driver so it's somewhat essential to take my vehicle with me. I need to drop dd2 at nursery 4 miles away 10 minutes later now as well, since the school nursery had no room for her.

Dd2 will be in school in September, so I could in theory walk them then and then go back for the van. But that would utterly pointless since I would then drive the van straight past the school again, same polution etc, and waste 20 mins work time.

Doesn't stop dd1 waving 'walk to school' leaflets at me, and telling me she needs to earn stickers though. Pointing out great facts such as car occupants are exposed to 3 times as much pollution on the school run as walkers. Don't really understand that since they're only in the car for 2 mins.

They usually walk home, but apparently that doesn't count.

Anyway it's all arbitrary stuff that kids are supposed to be motivated to do that they can't do anything about.

Fortunately never been in that situation, but can imagine if I was feeling down the last thing I'd want is nagging reminders about attendance.

Spooky - just had letter throught he door from DD1's college with her attendance rates for last term! (No, at 6th form level they don't get shiny certificates!). Actually, the college has the right idea, it contacts parents by letter or phone call if they are concerned about the amount of absence. DD1 has epilepsy, and I was able to have a sensible chat with her tutor about the nature of her epilepsy and what she was doing to reduce the risk of seizures.

Schools should do that rather than giving out certificates - give certificates and awards to children for things they have a direct influence on. Which would include school uniform, as school uniform is often cheaper than any other form of clothing, most schools also have some second hand items left over from lost property and donations, so there is no reason for parents not to buy it/be given it.

Ismene - LOL at the "eating your lunch" stickers - DS came home a few times commenting that he had got "the easiest good marks ever" - for eating vegetables

While I personally think some the awards are a bit silly my dd (6) loves them. She has a collection of stickers for reading and what not and she is really proud of them. She got pupil of the week a few weeks ago and she was over the moon with herself.
I do think the attendance and walk to week things are silly, but some of the others give children self confidence and that can't be a bad thing.

OP YANBU
I agree that schools do tend to be overinvolved with aspects of life that used to be a family's business. At our school it is more usual for juniors (so age 8 and up) to walk unaccompanied, than to be driven or accompanied. When it is the norm it does not need to be rewarded, it's just what happens. When I was that age you would not want to be 'taken' to school. We do live in a time warp here, though tbh.

My boys enjoy their walk to school with their friends, it is a reward in itself, and helps their independence. I think they would be bemused by a certificate for it.

I walk my youngest to school because she is too young at 6 to cross the road and we enjoy a chat on the way, again a reward in itself.

If it is unsafe or not feasible for any reason for children to walk, they should not be penalised for it, as for rewarding attendance that's obviously cruel for chilldren with health problems.

Just a waste of paper IMO.

YANBU I hate this rewarding the children for their parents efforts crap.
My ds is in Y1 and the week before Easter he came home with an envelope for Barnados, he had been told by his teacher that he had to ask his family and friends to put money in the envelope. This included putting your name, address, amount donated and gift aid. Anyway point being the child who collected the most money received a certificate in assembly in front of the whole school.

I was really really cross (maybe IWBU and should've asked you lot) I think it is unfair and nothing like sports days or things that require talent from the children. It's how much money/effort the parents are able to put in that or whether they are on the PTA!

kiwimum my point, though, is that if a workplace has it written down that you'll be disciplined if you are off three times in a year, it's the ones who are taking the p..s who know what they'll get away with. The ones who have genuinely been ill will have to take the time off, but then get disciplined. Or they come to work and pass their germs to others. Great

My ds1 got a sticker at a lunchtime club he goes to. I asked why he got it, and he replied, "It's the first week that I haven't gone to the toilet during the club." I said, "but remember it's still important to go to the loo if you need to go." He said, "no, I'll hold it in next time, so I get another sticker." So that was a great outcome.

*I don't think it needs to be taken so seriously, neither is it meant to punish anyone.

To me, it just re-inforces the message 'we, the school, think attendance is a good thing'*

Exactly. And all these scenarios concerning children not getting them due to ill health and children coming into school unwell to get their certificate are completely missing the point. These attendance rewards are not aimed at those children; they are aimed at children who take time off school for holidays, outings or other reasons. Or children who have been ill in the week and recovered but don't bother to come back in on a Friday. Or children whose parents think it's not that important to come to school every day.

It's to ENCOURAGE good attendance. Nothing wrong with that.

Is it not the case that technically schools that do this are discriminating against any child that has health/ disability issues that require medical treatment- as they are never going to be able to attain this award, and what about children whose faith dictates different religious holidays than the mainstream calender would they too not be unable to attain these awards.
In principal I have no problems with the idea of getting attendence levels up but believe that common sense should be applied - however as is becoming much more common in society in general, tick boxes trump common sense!

what about children who are rubbish at running on sports day?

It would maybe be discriminating if you were making the kids who'd ever missed a day forgo their lunch or something, but I think we're talking here about stickers and certificates!

It's just a nice thing to do for the kids who've got great attendance records. That is, or should be, all it was ever meant to be or can be taken to be.

Workplaces seem to have a bit more commonsense though (or perhaps I've been fortunate) - DD1 has a weekend job at Sainsburys, it's their company policy to have a manager interview you if you have more than a certain number of days off sick - basically, you get disciplined unless you have a damn good reason. DD1's epilepsy means she doesn't get hauled up, even though she went through a phase where she probably only did one shift in 4 because of it.

yeah but no-one's talking about hauling anyone up - but if at Sainsbury's someone retired and had never had a day off sick, say, it would surely be ok to mention that?

My daughter comes home with stickers sometimes which say 'keep an eye on me - I bumped my head!' She bloody loves stickers, as do her mates. Very unfair to all the children who did not bump their heads though.

We were talking with friends about 'walk to school' points at the weekend. Their DD gets them. I said it was unfair on children who couldn't walk for various reasons. Perhaps their parent wasn't able to walk, or perhaps they had to drop them off on the way to work etc. I was told I was being too 'PC'.

"And these children, of course, are the children MOST in need of the lesson that life isn't fair."

The funny thing is my daughter would never complain, she gets on with it, but you're right, she doesn't need a lesson in life not being fair she's living that lesson. I'm not sure if her school awards attendance but we do get the letters and it's heartbreaking because you'd do anything to not have them so ill. For me it's another kick that my body failed her, I couldn't keep her safe inside until her body was mature enough to survive life outside without being constantly ill and she shouldn't even be at school but her prematurity has made her a year older.

As an aside, my daughter was off ill on the day of a school trip that she was really looking forward to because of one of her many ear infections. The whole class got the "Star of the Week" award except her, so they gave her "Worker of the Week". She was a little upset about that because she was well aware the only reason she got it was because she didn't go on the trip - she's only 4! I was a little torn about it, I was glad they had recognised the fact she was being left out but felt for her because she knew why she was getting it and we did think it was funny a child who'd been off during the week had got "Worker of the Week".

cloudpuff I don't think anyone would complain about those sorts of awards, I'd rather that they were given out for something the child can control, my daughter loves it too and uses a drawer front to store all her stickers in her bedroom.

SoFluffyImGonnaDie I can remember all my relatives who live abroad used to regularly donate £1 to different sponsor things! Mum used to sit there saying "who else can we add?" so that we had lots of sponsors because we don't have a big extended family and she didn't want us to be left out. Now she tells me how much she put me down for on my nieces and nephews

Quenelle I have family coming to my house to collect my children because I'm currently virtually housebound and couldn't walk to school (less than a mile and it would take me 45 minutes plus to do it and no bus route) so I'm hoping they don't do walk to school at her school or that'll be something else she is left out on. When I can walk her in she's exhausted by it when she gets to school anyway and spends the day needing her inhalers.

Rewarding behaviour and attainment is a very good idea and motivates children. I don't think anybody is questioning the fairness of the rewards themselves (although I could... but that's another thread )- but you may as well reward children for having blue eyes. It makes a mockery of reward systems, and undermines what they were designed to achieve.

What on earth is a reward for attendance meant to motivate children to do? Not get ill? It's ridiculous.

If it's the only award given then I think it would be unfair. But assuming it's given as one of a set of awards, what's the problem? It's something that's different and may give a child who's lacking in confidence, and rarely achieves anything, a reward.
What I do find strange is when I've heard of child(ren) who's been chosen for something by the teacher (eg star part in the play/something lots would want to do) and then gets a reward for doing it. I don't really see the point of that.

DS's school do these awards. He's never going to win one which is unfair, given that he attends school whenever not really ill or in hospital.

He goes into school when having intravenous antibiotics or needing treatment during school. He works bloody harder than others to attend, and I get annoyed because it is unfair on him (he's not too bothered though).

"It's something that's different and may give a child who's lacking in confidence, and rarely achieves anything, a reward."

But it's not rewarding anything they have done. Every child can be rewarded for something they have done.

There are plenty of children who lack confidence, rarely achieve anything and do not receive an attendance award. What of them?

My son's old nursery awarded healthy eating stickers to kids who took packed lunches that they deemed to be acceptable. FFS - as if a 2 year old knows the fecking difference and packed her own lunch.
All that happens is that some kids get stickers and others don't and they don't have a clue why.

I detest the attendance thing too - as if not being ill is a frigging achievement. Idiotic.

What on earth is a reward for attendance meant to motivate children to do? Not get ill? It's ridiculous

No! It's motivating them not to take time off from school for reasons other than illness.

Is it really so difficult to understand?

No! It's motivating them not to take time off from school for reasons other than illness.

Whilst simultaneously penalising kids who have health problems.
Is that really so difficult to understand?

I LOVE attendance awards but no, not class ones. The poor kid who lets the team down left feeling crap. Also, improved attendance is bollocks as well - like you say,. what about those with 100% attendance?!

The reason i do like attendance rewards is because it encourages what is expected in 'real life' it also allows kids who may not acheive in many areas be rewarded for their ethics and not their ability.

Also walk to school week - what a load of bollocks. Because parents have all the time in the world to walk their kids to school then what, sprint back home to the car to get to work??!

I replied before looking at the other responses on purpose. Im astonished that people disagree with attendance reward! All through life you are reprimanded for poor attendance...

Whilst simultaneously penalising kids who have health problems.
Is that really so difficult to understand?

Here here!

I don't think anyone who is defending it has had to comfort a sick child who wants to go to school! I had to email nursery once and tell them she wasn't coming in because I'd told her nursery was closed because of the snow. Not that I was claiming a snow day but I knew her asthma wouldn't hold up to the walk in the snow and she was desperate to go. When she missed out on the school trip I emailed the children's TV and asked them to tell her that we'd take at the weekend (she's still not gotten over it, she was so chuffed!)

We give our kids rewards fo reach half term completed with no absense ourselves as our schools dont do it.