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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be annoyed that people keep telling me DD is really big?

72 replies

CrapBag · 11/05/2011 19:18

I suspect I am being a bit sensitive but when the media bang on and on about obesity etc, its hard not to think.

DD is 13 weeks and on the 50th centile line. I had her weighed last week and she was 12lbs 15oz. My friends all keep commenting on how big she is and saying she is massive. To me she looks like a normal size slightly chubby baby. DS was 3lbs heavier at DDs age, but he was nearly 1lb and a half heavier at birth anyway.

I asked the HV if she was ok, weight wise and she said she is fine. I am not worried that she weighs too much, she doesn't drink excessive amounts but I am getting fed up with the constant (and it is every time I see them) comments about DD being (apparently) "massive".

AIBU for being annoyed by this?

OP posts:

AttillaTheMum · 11/05/2011 19:23

Just ignore it.
DD is 9months and is in clothers for 3-6 months.
She eats like a pig and is totally healthy. Who cares? They will end up the same kinda size in the end.

cannydoit · 11/05/2011 19:29

ds was massive when born in 6 months clothes right away always was big, ignore people chubby babies are gorgeous, tiny babies are gorgeous. people just cant help commenting on them ds is 4 now and people still say to me he is big for 4. eye roll.

gkys · 11/05/2011 19:29

ignore them all, if it helps ds1 was 15lb 3 at fifteen weeks, and people kept telling me how small he was, I was furious hes a healthy six yr old now

knackered76 · 11/05/2011 19:36

You have to do your best to ignore it. I had this with ds, who admittedly wasn't small at birth, and got really fed up with people telling me how big he was and how he didn't look like a newborn, etc. Have to admit I did flip though when dh started to call him 'tank'!

ShowOfHands · 11/05/2011 19:40

DD's nickname is 'the tank'. She was off the charts by 12 weeks and had rolls on rolls on rolls. She's just tall now though. Still right at the top of the charts for height and weight but strong, lean and slim. She was just an immobile little baby with lots of lovely rolls.

People just like to say crap. DD's cousin is around the same age as her and still in 12-18 months clothing. She's 3.5yrs old. People say a lot of thoughtless stuff about her too.

I think people's mouths open and crap just falls out.

LaurieFairyCake · 11/05/2011 19:40

I keep wanting to go on a lot of threads and say this

It's social lubrication - people don't know what to say so they say how big and bonny your baby is.

People always make predictable, random comments - big baby/small baby/looks like his mum/it looks like its going to rain

People talk random shite

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 19:41

Awww she's only 13 weeks

DD2 has always been on the 91st centile line, people were always commenting on her size and I always answered with 'I know! Great innit?'

It's a positive comment, babies can't be overweight in that way.

Revel in the gorgeousness of your DD

DirtyBit · 11/05/2011 19:42

If it helps my baby will be not far off that weight when she is born next week. I can't wait for the reactions when people hear that .

Flisspaps · 11/05/2011 19:42

It's just something to say about her. People don't mean to annoy you - even if it makes you want to throw your fist into their chops

50th centile makes her perfectly average :)

TheSecondComing · 11/05/2011 19:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

vicki2010 · 11/05/2011 19:44

my baby cousin weighed 12lb 15oz at BIRTH!!! now THAT'S massive

She's an average sized person now and wasn't a fat child,it'll be fine and i would most def ignore!!

tiredfeet · 11/05/2011 19:45

Just ignore them its meaningless cooments. Think people either comment that a baby is 'really big' or 'really small', same as with bump sizes in pregnancy, they just feel the need to comment on the size.

I felt really self conscious about my 'enormous' bump in pregnancy after lots of comments, depsite measuring bang on for dates. I then got lots of comments about how huge ds was, and yes he was a chubby little man but looking back at the photos now he was still a gorgeously teeny tiny newborn baby

harecare · 11/05/2011 19:47

At 13 weeks people think they are paying a compliment to say she is massive. They probably mean she is healthy looking.
So you are definitely unreasonable to be annoyed at this. Just don't worry about it. My DDs were both massive and I was pleased they were so big, strong and healthy.

icooksocks · 11/05/2011 19:48

My ds2 is that heavy he doesn't have a line he's been above the top line since he was about 6 months old. He was born just below 75th and climbed and climbed! He now weighs 15.4kg at 16 months old. Just tell people she's average according to thecharts and leave it at that. But I suspect LaurieFairyCakes is right tbh.

AgentZigzag · 11/05/2011 19:49

fucking ouch vicki (depending on delivery)

saffy85 · 11/05/2011 19:49

They could use a slightly nicer word than "massive" imo but I doubt anyone means to offend. FWIW my DD was 9lbs 1oz at birth and continued to gain weight from then on at alarming speed. She was a hefty healthy 20lbs by the time she was 5 months old and clearly meant to be big. HV said same as yours- all fine and normal.

Enjoy your lovely, cuddly baby (cuddly a much nicer word don't you think?) and rest assured everyone's just jealous coz you get to sit there and cuddle your DD for as long as you want and they have to hand her back at some point

nometime · 11/05/2011 19:53

My DS weighed 9lb 15oz at birth and was 57cm long and spent most of his red book time hovering very near the top of the page. He was huge and still is - age 12 5ft 4" and size 9 1/2 -10 feet. I have lived for the last 12 years with comments about "what a big lad" he is. He's is fit and healthy and loves life.

Forget it as long as she grows up fit and healthy you've got it right!

fairydoll · 11/05/2011 19:58

It's just people making conveersation, and there is still the lingering belief that big babies are bonny and healthy.They are trying, rather clumsily, to compliment !

RitaMorgan · 11/05/2011 19:58

What else can you say about a 3 month old baby though?

Isn't she big/small/cute/funny

There's not a lot else going on! If she's bang on average then you know there's nothing to worry about.

foreverondiet · 11/05/2011 19:58

Ignore, they said that about my DS2 but he has been between 9th-25th centile so they obviously didn't know what they were talking about.

I agree at 13 weeks, esp if BF its a compliment.

izzybiz · 11/05/2011 20:03

I get this about Ds2 all the time, he was 10lb 10oz at birth and was floating in space above the 99th centile for a while!
He is 2 now and still a big boy, slim but well built and tall, people always think he's older than he is.
Next time someone says it, smile proudly!

ensure · 11/05/2011 20:13

People are always saying my DD is really tall and she is only on the 25 percent line for weight and height! So she is in proportion and not exceptionally skinny, making her look taller, or anything like that.
She is nearly 3. You may have this sort of thing for a while. People are weird.

allbie · 11/05/2011 20:49

I always thought there was a saying, '12 weeks, 12 pounds'...or have I just made it up? I'm sure that was what was said esp by HV! Your babe sounds rather gorgeous to me.

ChopMonster · 11/05/2011 20:53

My DS was 13lb 13oz at 8 weeks! He's 11 weeks now and god only knows what he weighs. He's got rolls everywhere!

I don't think people mean any harm, although they could use a better word than 'massive'.

squeakytoy · 11/05/2011 20:56

People are saying it as a compliment, not a criticism.

Most mums take it as being a credit to them raising a healthy baby who is growing well and that is how it is meant when someone says it.

My friend had a 12lb baby, who was huge! and there was no option but to comment on his size.

There are only so many cliches you can use to say about someones baby. :)

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