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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell my brother to call the police about this? Nasty trick..

101 replies

disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 10:10

The disgusting little bartenders at his place of work thought it would be a good wheeze to trick him.....we think...he's now unsure what to do....I think he should inform his boss and have the dirty little crap heads sacked...or the police....there's no proof though....the glass has been done away with.

What can he do I am livid on his behalf and am very close to going in there and banging their heads together...he's upset about it but not keen on conforntation...he wonders abuout telling the boss...he has texted one of the bartenders and the lad denied it and asked if he was ok..my bro thinks there was piss in the drink because none of the other guys tried this supposed cocktail and because it was "salty" and yellowish....he drank some....and a they were earting some strong cheese he thought that this was affecting the taste...so he drank some more...and thought it was gross..

Later it came to him that there may have been urine in it...in fact he is convinced due to the reactions of the lads....also should he get tested for anything? can you catch things from this???

OP posts:
boilingpoint · 10/05/2011 12:49

ernest if my barmaid friend came upto me and said - "some people who are not my friends gave me a drink and i have drank some of it, i have no idea what it had in it and i willingly drank it and now i feel all funny"

Yes i would say to her that she is a bloody idiot and common sense is that you NEVER drink a drink which you dont know where it has come from or what is in it!

there is a difference between being unwillingly spiked and knowingly putting yourself in danger!

ErnesttheBavarian · 10/05/2011 12:53

ok, she might have been daft for drinking it, but nevertheless, would you not support her or feel any concern? You would certainly be doing her a disservice to tell her the police would laugh at her.

Many people do unwise things due to peer pressure etc, doesn't mean they should not receive help or assistance.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 10/05/2011 12:54

It is going to implode!

penguin73 · 10/05/2011 12:55

This is his fight, not yours. The police can't do anything now, his colleagues would deny it I'm guessing so chances are his boss couldn't either and he would be ridiculed for having someone else fight his battles. He is the person that has to work there and deal with the fallout of any complaints, you don't have the right to make that decision for him when he is the one who will be left to pick up the pieces.

Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 12:57

I SAID I was not DOING anything! penguin!

So leave it....

OP posts:
boilingpoint · 10/05/2011 12:59

ernest, surely the police should be spending their time dealing with people who are victims of actual crimes? Not idiots who put themselves at harm and in line of risk!?

Of course i would help her and have a small amount of sympathy but i would also find it hard to sympathise with someone who has put them self in danger!

psiloveyou · 10/05/2011 13:01

Agree with those who say let him fight his own battles. Although I can see why as his big sister you would feel annoyed.

I used to work in a cocktail restaurant. Sadly the mentality of the staff meant that nasty tricks like this were actually very common. I heard of much worse.

penguin73 · 10/05/2011 13:01

then well done in coming to your senses, I got the impression that was only because of your brother wanting it left alone and had impressions of you nagging him.

ledkr · 10/05/2011 13:02

You lot are being a bit unfair,if op had posted that she thought her sister or dd had been given a weird drink would it have been different.My ds is 21 and i would talk to hi and advise him if this happened to him he probably feels a bit bullied tbh.I dont think op is denying he's been stupid to drink an unknown substence she just wanted advice on what to do about it.

squeakytoy · 10/05/2011 13:02

If the big sister of a 21year old MAN goes steaming in to defend him, against what is probably nothing more than a wind-up, he is going to get the piss taken out of him endlessly.

Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:07

penguin you can keep your "well done" love. I don't need it Hmm

ledkr exactly....if I were to believe some of the hard faced claptrap people on here come out with then I would think we lived in a society of selfish fools.

squeaky Move on....I have made it quite clear I am not going in there...

OP posts:
boilingpoint · 10/05/2011 13:08

ledkr i would say exactly the same as i have said if this was a grown woman under the same circumstances

beesimo · 10/05/2011 13:08

OP

You are getting flak her because you are a decent person who is revolted at what was done to a member of your family good for you. Standards of behaviour have fallen so far in this country that degrading and humilating 'jokes' are now seen as part of modern life. For what its worth I would as a employer get to the bottom of this I certainly wouldn't want anyone working for me pulling tricks like this.

It is low life gammy behaviour not a bit of fun and banter.

DialsMavis · 10/05/2011 13:10

Is it a possibility that he and his work mates took some speed/coke/whatever and he had to cover his arse when he got home and was still wasted?

Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:10

Thank you beesimo....it does seem as though some people accept filthy actions as part of life...and horseplay.

I think on the wider scale though....and of how their behaviour could escalate.

OP posts:
Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:11

no dials he would not have felt the need to cover his arse...he's 21....nobody here would have asked him about his mood or health....

OP posts:
nijinsky · 10/05/2011 13:15

I actually have had my drink spiked, in a nightclub. I was fortunate in that I was made to leave (for wanting to rest my head on a table and fall asleep) and as soon as the fresh air hit me, I was sick multiple times. I left my jacket behind in the club and got it back the next day, minus my mobile phone. I had my keys and purse with me and got a taxi safely home. I felt a bit woozy the next day but then I recovered.

Did I call the police? No. I don't know who did it, I don't see what the police could have done about it and whatever it was would have been well out of my system - its pretty well documented how difficult it is to trace these drugs in women who have been unfortunate enough to be "date raped".

That was far more serious than what might have happened to your brother and I managed to get over it.

tbh though OP you don't describe what happened to your brother very clearly, it all sounds incredibly vague.

beesimo · 10/05/2011 13:24

Nijinsky

You damn well should of called the police regarding drink spiking you owe it to other women and lasses to come forward about this issue

nijinsky · 10/05/2011 13:28

Unfortunatley I was only able to muster all my remaining facilties on getting out of there to safety as quickly as possible. But I agree, I should have called the police. When I did recover enough to think rationally, I thought it would have been too late.

However I mention it as a real instance of drink spiking with genuine, serious physical effects, not colleagues joking around with someone at work, and I was perfectly able to get over it.

If the OP's brother's drink had been spiked with a harmful substance, he would have suffered some form of physical trauma. I don't think grinding teeth and being restless quite qualify. Going to the police otherwise because he "thinks" there might have been something put in his drink just sounds about as vague as the OP's original post. I don't see what the police are meant to do about this.

Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:29

nijinsky not reporting that could have cost the police valuable information. Its nothing to be proud of.

OP posts:
Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:30

I have not gone into all my brothers symptoms...I see no need to when most people on here have been awful. I have had to report one comment as abusive as it is.

OP posts:
Original poster
disgustedperson · 10/05/2011 13:30

I;ll hide this now...too upetting.

OP posts:
FurKnickersAndNoCoat · 10/05/2011 13:35

this reads like an attention seeking teenager has thought it up. Hmm

droves · 10/05/2011 13:42

disgusted , you have a real concern imo , .
I would tell your brother to go to doctor /a& e and explain that he thinks he may have been spiked with something and isnt feeling to good.
They would be able to do a blood test/urine test and find out what it was.

Then he would have proof to go to police with.

Its disgusting that workmates would do this to him. Sad
I hope he finds a new , job soon.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 10/05/2011 13:45

The OP was a little touchy but good grief people!

I'd have felt the same as the op did about someone I cared for, regardless of their age.

And I don't think her db was stupid for accepting a drink from colleagues - they were hardly strangers.

I would advise him to talk to his boss.