to have cats put to sleep

[WakeUpRosemary]

Hi

I haven't posted here much but have lurked a lot so please be gentle.

I have three cats at the moment, two of which I took in as kittens, socialised and have looked after for about six/seven years now. Since then I've had a son and as I live in a small house things are getting crowded. I wouldn't mind this so much if these two cats didn't urinate in various parts of the house. They have access to the outside and a litter tray. One in particular has been doing it for years and I've just had enough. It's stinking up the house, it's unhygienic and I'm sick of it. They have no physical problems, they don''t have UTIs: it's a behavioural problem. One of them doesn't get on well with the other two cats but I'm not prepared to play cat psychologist. I haven't the time or the energy. I'm beginning to think that I have to have them put to sleep. I feel there's no point putting them up for re-homing because who would want a six/seven-year-old cats with piss problems? It would also be upsetting to them if they were uprooted and probably brought back again. They're both skittish and not particularly fond of anyone but me and my DH.

So far this week I've found piss on a hand-towel in the kitchen, a chair and my son's toy garage. Fortunately, my son is particularly fond of the cat who doesn't pee everywhere and he's only three and a half so I doubt he'll be upset if the other two disappear. He may not even notice. I feel so bad though. I used to do quite of a lot of rescue work with cats and never dreamt I'd be considering this. I worry when people come to visit because I'm nervous a cat will piss on their bag, or they'll find a previously-undiscovered pool of piss or try to dry their hands on a pissy towel. It's gotten so I'm not that nice to any of the cats anymore and I think we'd be happier as a one-cat household.

sorry I've rambled. Am I being unreasonable?

turkey love your take on your felines makes me wonder why we love the furry monsters as much as we do but when one of mine looks me in the face with that total trust look that says my life is yours i melt and the scratches on the furniture, the rodent i have just disposed of or actually got to before they have killed it and released it to live another day, and cleaned out the bathroom sink that one of them mmistakes for the litter tray are just part of daily life with cats :0

The main thing is this - do you know that you need AT LEAST one litter tray per cat plus one more, in various places around the house, in a multi-cat household?
Their is an unseen hierarchy among your cats, around use of litter trays. One cat can bully another, prevent it from using teay, etc...scent of one can put another off using tray etc etc, all these things can cause cats to stress pee all over the house.

Start from scratch - go out and buy 4 litter trays, 2 of them need to be igloo type with a lid so cat can pee/poo in privacy.
Buy 2 feliway plug ins, one up one downstairs.
Go to this website for advice - the Feline Advisory Bureau.- www.fabcats.org/

Multi cat households can be terribly stressful to cats, you need to make sure you try these things and see if they work before re homing any of them

Healthy happy cats do not piss and shit inside. They just don't.

And to set the cat amongst the pigeons (pun intended) even more, I would be inclined to say keeping a cat in circumstances where it had to use a litter tray is pretty cruel. They are free ranging, independent outdoor animals. If you can't provide them with what they need, and if you can;t deal with the "letting go" necessary for them to live a proper "cat" life,then don;t ahve a cat.

I find it particularly horrible that you admitted that one of thE cats had done this for years...... so you actually "allowed " this to carry on and continue.... but now YOU are fed up its a problem.... no concern that the cat has obviously had a problem for years which you haven't seen fit to sort out.

YSBVAOY

I LOVE cats. I worked at an animal rescue centre and spend as much time as I can on animal rights activities. My cats are so important to me, you wouldn't believe it.

However, I wouldn't be able to live with cats who urinated regularly on things in the house. I would find that incredibly stressful personally, and I wonder about the mental health of the cats.

I can also understand your fears for the cats languishing in a rescue centre. I worked at one of the best in the country, but cats still found it a stressful environment. I'm not suggesting that you don't try to re-home them, but I empathise with your concerns. I worry that one day I won't be able to look after my cats (hit by a bus scenario!), so I've spoken to someone who I know will give them a good home.

Obviously try everything that's been recommended in terms of training. For their sake and yours. You will find it very difficult to have their little lives ended and I bet you regret it.

sparkly i have six cats one old grumpy gus who lives in one of the bedrooms when he dosent want to talk to the others, a victor meldrew who the others know to keep away from, a brother and sis combo who are joined at the hip and the two younger ones who despite coming from haworth cat rescue at different times have teamed up together, non of them are stressed out and theyall eat in a line in the kitchen, four of them sleep together in a big huggle at night in the bathroom, so multi cat houses are not always stressful mine have a huge garden t hang out in dring the day and come in at night cos i know thats when hunting becomes more of aproblem to wildlife, all neutered so no hormone induced aggro

Turkey burger - ha ha ha, your cat sounds great i love him, what a character

'If you can't provide them with what they need, and if you can;t deal with the "letting go" necessary for them to live a proper "cat" life,then don;t ahve a cat.'

Indeed.....so re-home them don't kill the poor things.

Wow. How cruel. That's just mean. You big old meany.

"whats wron with the cat havin kittens"

Because there are plenty of cats and kittens that already exist in rescue centres that need rehoming.

THANK YOU TOTEMPOLE.

The voice of common sense and reason.

FFS, nailak, if potential owners want a cat or kitten they need only to apply to rescue, who are innundated. Why make thier job harder still and contribute to cats being killed for want of homes by breeding yet more? Sorry to be patronising but is it THAT hard to comprehend????

And btw, WTF is wrong with your G key?

WakeUpRosematy, do tell please... which rescue was it that you worked for?

I think the original post was a cry for help. From what she has said later I don't think she intends to PTS these cats and won't do so. I hope it works out for her and the cats.

Hmm. I think given the numbers of animals in rescue, it is actually more responsible of you to have them put to sleep at home, unstressed, then to pass them on to god knows what end.

Not a choice I would want to make myself- I would try to retrain them first. But still the responsible thing to do I think.

Aw no! Thats terrible op. Have not read all of this but by the size of the thread I can see I'm not the only one who thinks this. Why do people think animals are going to be a doddle dont bloody get one if you aren't prepared for mess of some sort. An animal isnt something disposable.

jesus this poor woman came here for an opinion and some answers. i would advise rehoming the cats too. deffinately dont put them down.
this woman clearly isnt a cat hater as she worked in a cat rescue job.
she tried to help 3 cats and its gotten too much for her.
i imagine the stress of this situation has prompted her to believe they may be better of put tpo sleep. and if these cats do pee everywhere and if they are unfriendly then i can see why she would thing they might be better put to sleep.
however it would be cruel to put them to sleep without giving them a chance so WakeUpRosemary send them to be rehomed and let the animal sanctuary decide whats best then your cats may get a 2nd chance at life and you will be safe in the knowledge you tried your best

I agree with Jade. Cats get very stressed when they move out of a familiar environment - ours take about 2 weeks to recover from their annual trip to the vets.

if you really can't cope, I would do these, in order

1. Try them outside- presumably they can get out of the yard and have a bit of a roam about
2. re-home them from home (without sending them to the cat's home first)
3. Call the vet to the house and have them PTS.

No flaming from me as I had a similar dilemma a few years ago- we were fostering 2 cats, and then moved overseas. To take with would have cost £3k per cat. I had to decide whether to return them to cat home (which had basically traumatised one of them the first time she was there) or PTS. In the end, DH's company covered the move so we took them. However, they're now house cats which doesn't really suit them and I do wonder if I made the right decision as prior to being at the cat's home they'd both been stray, and I suspect that that life quite suited them.

The sad fact is that there are too many cats in the world, and not enough owners. If you re-home your cats, then 2 other cats get PTS.

OP writes, I know about Feliway but I'd have to literally spray it everywhere.

So?

YABVU

"I haven't the time or the energy"

That speaks volumes. I sympathise with you (I've been there!) - it's not easy having a cat that soils in the house, but you have to be prepared to actually find the cause of the problem and tackle it. I'm not going to suggest ways to deal with the problem because I think you should re-home your cats and give them a chance to find loving homes.

You DEFINATELY need to get rid of these cats.

A cat santuary might be best.

Just go and do it and get your life back.

'It's a family member after all'

... No it isn't it's an animal!!!!

Harsh but true from TheBride.

What if they got to a rescue centre but don't get adopted by anybody so fester there forever? What if they get adopted but not into truly loving homes? What if someone half-way well-meaning takes them on but then can't cope any better than OP? They could end up dumped, abused. Might be doing the kinder thing to them by preventing all that. OP sounds like she's trying to the most responsible owner possible by being willing to consider the hardest decisions. The ex-feral cat would be esp. difficult to rehome, we tamed a feral kitten, was the stupidest cat I've ever met (brain damage from malnutrition I expect). Not like regular domestic cats at all.

My vet recommends an additive to the cats' food called Zylkene, which helps "cats facing daily stress". It's derived from milk protein apparently.

To cut a long story short - one of my cats had started peeing a round the house (including on sets of work papers on the kitchen table - ummm, nice) and the vet diagnosed stress and treated cat for UTI to be on the safe side as well as giving me a supply of said Zylkene. For subsquent minor episodes we have found success with Feliway.

But there are important themes here to note:

We took the cat to the vet. As a family we made the decision to cough up for the expense of treatment and a have a couple fewer xmas presents that year.

We located the source of the stress and took steps to mitigate.

I'll stop now because I'm getting really fucking boring but would just say to the OP that she really should try these options because the guilt of having cats put down would prey on me for ever and I'm not even a big softie.

i am going to wade in having not read the thread, so forgive me for repeating what others will have said.

we had this problem very acutely. one cat was urinating on my daughter's bed, in her toy box, over our laundry etc.
you need

• vets check. for physical problems.
• deep clean at home, using pets at home anti-wee stuff. cover furniture, put citrus peel out.
• lots of feliway
• back to vet for anti anxiety stuff. we tried zylkene.
• try to secure the garden in case of furry invaders upsetting the status quo.
• get on the waiting list for a rescue place

we did all of the above over the course of 6months and never solved the problem. i was spending that long cleaning up cat urine that i wasn't playing with my daughter when i got in from work. we were all miserable - the family, and both of the cats. i firmly believe that although our cats were rehomed to us as a pair, they were both too territorial to share a home.

cat one (the one with a wee problem) was rehomed, and i understand he has not being weeing in his new home where he is the only cat. cat two is much, much happier now that she is our sole feline resident. cat one was rehomed within 3 weeks of going to a rescue centre (the same one we got him from).

Nailak - You are a complete and utter fuckwit. Thousands of cats and kittens are murdered every year because backyard breeding morons like you let their cat have litter after litter. Infact, I would go so far as to say you are such a complete and utter fuckwit, it is useless even explaining WHY you should get your animals neutered. It is pointless wasting my breath.

wotnotchocs Pets are family members if you are a genuine animal lover. And if your not then you shouldnt have pets. I am a veterinary nurse and I have seen so many people totally heartbroken when their pets have died or PTS. I think your comment is stupid and narrow minded!!

quietTiger Nice one! Totally agree!

opBeing a vet nurse and seeing what I have seen over the years its highly likely that your vet will refuse to put your cats to sleep for that reason and they are well within their rights to say no!

Its disgusting that you have even thought of that! Euthanasia is not something to be taken lightly, this is used in extreme cases with health and sometimes aggressive dogs too when nothing else can be done. But its not meant for cats that havnt been toilet trained properly by the owner!

What happens when your kids wee the bed and have accidents? Gonna get fed up with them too?

There are many things you can do to sort this but clearly you cant be arsed to accept your responsibilities so you should rehome them. That would be the kindest thing to do as they will have a better chance of finding an owner that will love them again

YABU