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AIBU?

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Original poster

to have cats put to sleep

237 replies

WakeUpRosemary · 06/05/2011 16:02

Hi

I haven't posted here much but have lurked a lot so please be gentle.

I have three cats at the moment, two of which I took in as kittens, socialised and have looked after for about six/seven years now. Since then I've had a son and as I live in a small house things are getting crowded. I wouldn't mind this so much if these two cats didn't urinate in various parts of the house. They have access to the outside and a litter tray. One in particular has been doing it for years and I've just had enough. It's stinking up the house, it's unhygienic and I'm sick of it. They have no physical problems, they don''t have UTIs: it's a behavioural problem. One of them doesn't get on well with the other two cats but I'm not prepared to play cat psychologist. I haven't the time or the energy. I'm beginning to think that I have to have them put to sleep. I feel there's no point putting them up for re-homing because who would want a six/seven-year-old cats with piss problems? It would also be upsetting to them if they were uprooted and probably brought back again. They're both skittish and not particularly fond of anyone but me and my DH.

So far this week I've found piss on a hand-towel in the kitchen, a chair and my son's toy garage. Fortunately, my son is particularly fond of the cat who doesn't pee everywhere and he's only three and a half so I doubt he'll be upset if the other two disappear. He may not even notice. I feel so bad though. I used to do quite of a lot of rescue work with cats and never dreamt I'd be considering this. I worry when people come to visit because I'm nervous a cat will piss on their bag, or they'll find a previously-undiscovered pool of piss or try to dry their hands on a pissy towel. It's gotten so I'm not that nice to any of the cats anymore and I think we'd be happier as a one-cat household.

sorry I've rambled. Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
NulliusInVerba · 06/05/2011 21:22

seeker no one is suggesting animal cruelty, I take your point and understand it, but there is a world of difference between keeping a suffering animal alive, and PTS two cats that are totally healthy because they might not get a new home.

Read my past posts, I rehomed a cat like this, knowing full well the problems. I have turned him around.

nailak · 06/05/2011 21:25

erm all the kittens have one to lovin homes? one to my mum, one to my niece, and family friends etc, so i dont understand what is the problem? these are not unwanted kittens bein advertised on umtree, these are kittens been ivin to lovin homes?

and about the name, i wanted to call it tabatha, but my dd kept sayin no its called my cat and ettin upset so we ave in to her,

whats wron with the cat havin kittens, i thouht the issue was if the kittens were unwanted, but we have more then 4 people already interested in these four kittens,

and its not as if we et paid or anythin,

and if there is an issue that i dont understand wouldnt it be better if you explain it to me rather then flame me so i actually know what you are talkin about....

i really dont understand what is irresponsible and why i am an idiot? im not drownin cats, my cats dont fiht, i check up on the kittens that i have iven away...
my mum even brins her one back to visit me for ffs

seriously you lot miht live in an area where there are too many kittens and not enouh demand for them, but dont think that applies to everywhere,

and tbj you are an idiot for instructin me to do somethin and not even tellin me why, and expectin me to do it,

and its offsprin that is prenant is well looked after and in a different house, but like i said i enquire about the kittens i ive away so thats how i know about it.

issey6cats · 06/05/2011 21:25

nailak and people like her are the reason haworth cat rescue currently has 58 kittens and thier moms (who will also need rehoming) in foster homes at the moment all of these will have to come into the center be rehomed in front of the other cats who are on the waiting list grrr WHY DONT PEOPLE SPAY OR NEUTER THIER CATS by the way just in case anyone is wondering about kits from haworth all go out flead wormed neutered and microchipped
naila if you are on any sort of benefits please get in touch with either cats protection league or rspca as they both do cheap neutering schemes

seeker · 06/05/2011 21:25

Putting them to sleep may be many things you disapprove of, but it is definitely not cruel. There is no pain, either physical or psychological, suffering or fear involved, so therefore no cruelty.

NulliusInVerba · 06/05/2011 21:28

nailak, I would respond to that post, problem is, im not really sure what on earth you are saying.

Basically, I was telling you to get the cats spayed (so they cannot have more kittens) Because there are many many cats and kittens needing homes already.

nailak · 06/05/2011 21:30

i dont understand still, sorry, becuase other people ive away their kittens and dont look after them i am somehow responsible? even thouh i make sure mine o to ood homes with responsible people who have experience in lookin after pets?

i ot my cat in the first place from a neihbour who didnt want it,

nailak · 06/05/2011 21:31

basically i am sayin that there is no issue with my kittens findin homes so what is the issue and why an i an idiot? and why is it my fault other people have issues housin kittens/

issey6cats · 06/05/2011 21:31

nailak you have just hit the nail on the head you say one of yoyur cats kittens is now pregnant did you know that uneutered one queen cat can altimmately be responsible for 20000 descendants and an uneutered cat is prone to cancer of the uteris and piometra which is a seriuos infection of the womb, and an uneutered cat comes into heat every 3 weeks or so , so you will have toms hanging round, a she cat you cant let out the house, and if she does get out it wont be next doors nice wee tom that will mate with her it will be like a gang bang all the unetered toms in the area will mate with her im not flaming you just pointing out the notion of whats wrong with me cat having two or three litters of kittens

Bottleofbeer · 06/05/2011 21:31

For a nine month old cat to be heavily pregnant she must have got pregnant pretty much with one of her first 'heats' - it's too young imo. Are the kittens going to their new homes fully vaccinated? are they chipped? are you sure the new owners are doing this for them?

I understand it can be really hard to stop a female cat getting pregnant, especially if she lives with un-neutred males, my vet spays at six months, mine came into season just before it got done and it was absolute murder keeping her in the house with randy toms catcalling (another reason you should spay/neuter, if their owners had them done it would have my life a lot easier) and her literally crying for hours to get out of the house. It's cruel for them to be in that situation not to mention how bloody annoying a female cat in season can be!

TotemPole · 06/05/2011 21:33

whats wron with the cat havin kittens

Because there are plenty of cats and kittens that already exist in rescue centres that need rehoming. The people who took your kittens could have taken a rescue centre kitten and made space at the centre.

wotnochocs · 06/05/2011 21:35

I agree wholeheartedly with seeker.you cannot equate cats with humans

nailak · 06/05/2011 21:38

but they wouldnt have one to the rescue centre. they would have waited until someone else they know has kittens.

issey i did not know that, and tbh informin and educatin me is a lot more effective then flamin and callin me an idiot imo? wouldnt you think?

we hear the toms outside, my cat doesnt o outside then, shes ot some sense?

i was worried when my cat was prenant that she was too youn, but she proved to be a fantastic mum.

the kittens are not chipped but are vaccinated. i know the new owners are doin this because one is my mum and another showed that pet book!

i dont understand this cancer, what do wild cats do? why doesnt it effect them?

Bottleofbeer · 06/05/2011 21:40

The cat's got more sense than to go out with toms catcalling outside? that's only because she isn't in heat. Believe me when she goes into season she'll be chomping at the bit to get at them, it's nature.

Bottleofbeer · 06/05/2011 21:42

It does affect wild cats, their lifespan is much shorter than a pet cat for one thing.

issey6cats · 06/05/2011 21:44

nailak it depends if you mean true wild cats or feral cats,
i presume you mean ferals, they do not have agood life or health they mate again as soon as the kits are weaned, they have far too many litters, they usualy die youing from having litter after litter, tha toms in a feral colony are usually full of infections and abcesses from fighting with the other toms in the colony, fortunately nowadays there are orginisations that will do capture neuter release back to the colony this stops the moms having kits, the toms from fighting and the colony manageable

hester · 06/05/2011 21:46

No, Maryz, you are not alone. I love my cat but it is NOT a member of the family and i do not accept that I have entered into an obligation similar to that I have for my children. I also do not see putting a cat down as murder, or think that by taking one own you are obligated to keeping it for life.

We do, of course, have to look after our pets, and I am horrified by cruelty to animals. But putting an animal down humanely - while the reasons for it may be a bit distasteful - isn't actually cruel.

nailak · 06/05/2011 21:48

i am plannin on havin my cat spayed btw, 2 litters is enouh, i wasnt plannin to have a litter every 6 mnths!!

anyway back to behavioural problems in cats, how do they start? is it just due to nature of the individual?

my cats dont fiht, i have never seen them with cuts etc, or heard them fiht, and when i first ot them i used to run outside every time i heard cats thinkin they may be fihtin.

mouseanon · 06/05/2011 21:48

I'd agree getting an animal pts isn't cruel. It's a morality issue not a cruelty issue. The animal doesn't suffer, it doesn't anticipate it's death and fear it, when it's dead it is not suffering. I can see the ethical objection but it isn't cruel.

OP I have a couple of links for you...

www.fabcats.org/behaviour/spraying/index.php

www.apbc.org.uk/

I think the issues that you have are resolvable. Rehoming one of the cats might help but it may be worth getting some professional behavioural advice first as it may not be necessary.

mouseanon · 06/05/2011 21:49

Try again:

www.fabcats.org/behaviour/spraying/index.php

www.apbc.org.uk/

Ephiny · 06/05/2011 21:49

nailak - people have been a bit harsh, but really what did you expect? I thought everyone knew that you must get your cat spayed if she's going to be let out, it's one of the absolute basics along with chipping and vaccinating.

Of course you're not responsible for what other people do or don't do, but you can stop adding to the huge and growing problem of unwanted cats and kittens. To make it as simple as possible - we as a society have far too many cats compared to the numbers of homes available for them. Therefore you should not be bringing more kittens into the world. It's so preventable and unnecessary.

If your kittens' new owners would have waited for someone else's cat to have kittens instead of going to rescue - well, that's up to them. But presumably 'someone else's cat' will have the kittens anyway, so where are they going to go now?

NulliusInVerba · 06/05/2011 21:50

nailak is the "G" on your computer broken? Genuine question.

Your cat has not "got more sense" than to go out with the toms. When she is in heat she will actively want to get pregnant, and actually it can be very distressing for the cat.

Have you not had the first, mommy cat, spayed yet?
If not why not?
Its no good saying a few people want them, how do you know how many she will have? Cats have been known to have litters of nine.

fit2drop · 06/05/2011 21:53

nailak have a word with yourself ....how irresponsible

oh and your G key needs fixing :)

issey6cats · 06/05/2011 21:54

its not just female cats that need spaying the life of an adult whole tom cat is one of searching for a female ,not eating while he does this, being missing from home so sleeping rough, fighting every tom that challenges him for the female, prone to infections because th females he mates with may have an infection, abcesses from cat bites during fighting which if untreated can kill him

electra · 06/05/2011 21:55

'Putting them to sleep may be many things you disapprove of, but it is definitely not cruel. There is no pain, either physical or psychological, suffering or fear involved, so therefore no cruelty.'

Ending the life of a healthy cat is what is cruel imo. Pain doesn't come into it.

TurkeyBurgerThing · 06/05/2011 21:55

I sympathise with the mess. I currently have a grand total of 5 shat and pissed upon duvets in a cupboard which are too big for me to put in our washing machine and are waiting for the laundret.

I find towels and clothes ruined weekly. I've just this minute cleared up regurgatated rodent. Again. He NEVER catches the mice indoors, only ones from outside which he either leaves as a revolting stew or uses them as play things which are then injured enough to run off and die and rot somewhere unreachable.

He gets into cupboarsd and rooms like a ninja stealth despide my obsessive door shutting.

However, cats are cats. They piss and they shit, and as frustrating and revolting as it is I made the decision to have a cat and I'll clear up his disgusting excretions until he pops his fluffy clogs. YABU.