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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to have cats put to sleep

237 replies

WakeUpRosemary · 06/05/2011 16:02

Hi

I haven't posted here much but have lurked a lot so please be gentle.

I have three cats at the moment, two of which I took in as kittens, socialised and have looked after for about six/seven years now. Since then I've had a son and as I live in a small house things are getting crowded. I wouldn't mind this so much if these two cats didn't urinate in various parts of the house. They have access to the outside and a litter tray. One in particular has been doing it for years and I've just had enough. It's stinking up the house, it's unhygienic and I'm sick of it. They have no physical problems, they don''t have UTIs: it's a behavioural problem. One of them doesn't get on well with the other two cats but I'm not prepared to play cat psychologist. I haven't the time or the energy. I'm beginning to think that I have to have them put to sleep. I feel there's no point putting them up for re-homing because who would want a six/seven-year-old cats with piss problems? It would also be upsetting to them if they were uprooted and probably brought back again. They're both skittish and not particularly fond of anyone but me and my DH.

So far this week I've found piss on a hand-towel in the kitchen, a chair and my son's toy garage. Fortunately, my son is particularly fond of the cat who doesn't pee everywhere and he's only three and a half so I doubt he'll be upset if the other two disappear. He may not even notice. I feel so bad though. I used to do quite of a lot of rescue work with cats and never dreamt I'd be considering this. I worry when people come to visit because I'm nervous a cat will piss on their bag, or they'll find a previously-undiscovered pool of piss or try to dry their hands on a pissy towel. It's gotten so I'm not that nice to any of the cats anymore and I think we'd be happier as a one-cat household.

sorry I've rambled. Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Sn0wflake · 06/05/2011 16:16

I think you should try and re-home. Apart from thinking it's wrong personally to kill them when there is nothing wrong with them. I think after a little while you will feel incredibly guilty for what you had done.

I think you must be under some pressure or depressed to be thinking in this way. Do something to make your life easier. Just don't kill the cats. You will regret it.

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls · 06/05/2011 16:17

Fab, was hoping you wouldn't look at this thread tbh! Just seen your thread and hope fabcat is ok.

Northernlurker · 06/05/2011 16:18

YABU - please contact a rescue and finally do the decent thing. These cats don't need you in their lives.

Maryz · 06/05/2011 16:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WakeUpRosemary · 06/05/2011 16:18

I've already posted about them on a local rescue site to see if anyone knows of anyone who can take them. But having worked in rescue myself I know that these cats are unlikely to be rehomed. There are a lot of kittens around at the moment and not that many homes.

I've been thinking of keeping them outside but we have a small yard with a tiny shed full of tools and live in city. We don't have space. We don't have a garage and we don't have a garden. They would be miserable outside. Although maybe if I got one of those big kennels...

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrools: they haven't just started doing it but it's getting worse.

Soggy14: I know about Feliway but I'd have to literally spray it everywhere. At the moment they're restricted to the living/diningroom and kitchen with access to the cat-flap and they still won't just go outside to pee. The litter-tray is outside the back door.

I realise this is an emotive subject and until now I would have reacted the same as you all. I've spent a lot of money and time on SNR, fostering and socialising cats and kittens so I could really do without the abuse.

OP posts:
EmmaBemma · 06/05/2011 16:19

I think all this anger is a bit much... she's talking about having the cats put to sleep, not tortured to death. I don't agree that it's anywhere near her best option, but I think a bit of perspective is needed here. Presumably you're not all vegetarians, and thus are quite happy for animals to be "murdered" so you can eat them for your dinner or wear them on your feet.

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls · 06/05/2011 16:20

I think the circumstances are different for a 6/7 yo cat to a 15y/o loved family cat.

EmmaBemma · 06/05/2011 16:20

Feliway doesn't always work people... see my post earlier.

ForeverNamechanging · 06/05/2011 16:20

Are you cats neutered? Ours sprayed till we had them done.

Don't have them killed though do the right thing and call a rescue home

Tidey · 06/05/2011 16:20

I don't think it's even an option is it?? Surely she can't take perfectly healthy pets to a vet and ask to have them killed, there's no way they'd do it! Please OP, don't think this way, look into animal shelters or something.

bamboobutton · 06/05/2011 16:20

but these cats won't be eaten or their fur used, they will be slung in an incinerator.

bamboobutton · 06/05/2011 16:21

that was to emmabemma

c0rn51lk · 06/05/2011 16:21

don't leave stuff lying around and then they can't piss on it. How did they manage to piss on the hand towel anyway? I think you should rehome them though.

ragged · 06/05/2011 16:22

Too right, EmmaBemma.
Are there not Cat Whisperers?

BooyHoo · 06/05/2011 16:22

OP if you are so experienced with cats and rescuing/fostering i do not believe that the only conclusion you have come to is to euthanase your cats. i do not believe that. with the experience you talk of, you 100% know there are other options and you most definitely should have contacts to be able to rehome these animals.

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls · 06/05/2011 16:23

OK I do hear what you are saying, we had a puppy that chews for britain, however we have made alternative arrangements for her and now she is much happier and so are we, instead of being the PITA she was she is now a much loved family pet with us. And I did the most stupid thing of getting a puppy when we had a 3 mo and a 3yo....... but we have put the time and effort in and it was worth it Smile

ClaireDeLoon · 06/05/2011 16:23

So why don't you try an outdoor cat cabin/kennel thing then? Try it, see if they will take to it, if it doesn't work maybe you could ebay it. Do they prefer being indoors or outdoors?

People are reacting strongly because from your OP this seemed to be the first thing you have thought of doing. But if you have thought of alternatives then why not put them into action and give them a chance?

Northernlurker · 06/05/2011 16:25

You want to kill healthy cats who have trusted you and lived with you for 6 years because you can't be arsed to help them and you expect NOT to get abuse? Dream on.
I don't kike cats peeing - who would? But you have a duty to them to sort this out and putting them down is a totally inappropriate response. Get a grip.

twooter · 06/05/2011 16:25

I can understand your frustration, op. It does sound as though they may not like living in a multicat household, and it will obviously be hard to rehome them. I would maybe try getting a couple of sheds, and see if they'll live outside albeit with their own dens. Feliway may help during the changeover, but it's not infallible.

If things don't work out, and you can't rehome, then I don't think yabu to euthanise. They could well live for another 10 years, which would not be good for your sanity or theirs.

WakeUpRosemary · 06/05/2011 16:26

This thread is moving so fast. They're all spayed. They have a great life. They're well-fed and cared-for. They're warm. We keep the heat on in the daytime in the winter just for them. They sleep on cushions all day and laps in the evening. I'm not in the least bit cruel to them.

OP posts:
twooter · 06/05/2011 16:26

I think a lot of posters assume cats peeing in the house is similar to dogs peeing in the house. It's not.

MackerelOfFact · 06/05/2011 16:26

YABVVVU. I'm no cat fan, but that's beyond cruel. By all means responsibly rehome any pet you really feel you can't care for, but it sounds like you are able to look after 3 cats, you just dislike 2 of them.

Go to the vet and ask what can be done, humanely, to help the problem.

hatwoman · 06/05/2011 16:27

unbelievably u. we have had a cat with pee-related problems - which drove us up the wall. it never, for one second, occured to us to put her down. we took her on - with the attendant risk that she might be a peeing pita, so we took responsibilty for her, looked after her, enjoyed her, cared for her (and ran up bills anounting to probably 1000s of pounds in damage to carpets and curtains in a rented property.)

4 weeks ago she had kidney failure and we had no choice but to put her to sleep. she was 4 years old. she was a pita but she was a much loved pita. if you can;t be bothered to love your cats that doesn;t give you the right to kill them.

MadamDeathstare · 06/05/2011 16:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

twooter · 06/05/2011 16:28

Have they got 'private' elevated areas in the house? Is it possible for them to get away from each other and your son?