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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to attend the count, when I am a candidate even if I am a nursing mother still?

83 replies

weirdbird · 05/05/2011 17:48

Basically as the subject says, bf mother with 7mth old baby, still not that keen on food, I am a candidate in todays local elections and have been told at the last min that the council do not consider it "appropriate" for me to attend with baby at the count tomorrow and he is not allowed entrance.
This means that I cannot attend as he won't take a bottle.

I understand it is not a place for children but this just seems ridiculas, they are only sat around counting the votes, but it means I can't be there to find out if I have gotten in!

It is a noisy room anyway with 100's of people talking, so its not like he is going to disturb the peace (and I would remove him if he made too much noise, but at 7mths he just likes looking around and gurgling away)

Am I being un-reasonable or is the councils Electoral Services manager.

OP posts:
DameShirleyKnot · 05/05/2011 17:50
Shock

Take him. Feed him. Screw them (don't actually have the sex with them...you know what I mean)

I am appalled TBH.

Indith · 05/05/2011 17:52

Huh? Why isn't he allowed? That is just absurd. Of course it isn't a place for children but there is a big difference between a child and a babe in arms. I would be huffing and making noises about discrimination against mothers.

As an aside, how the hell are you?

unclefester77 · 05/05/2011 17:53

I see no one is on this thread except for me meant to be marking essays, and so I wondered....what reason exactly do they give you? Does the general public not have a right to be at the count and if so, surely candidates must be allowed? If it's a polling station it must surely have a backroom where you could feed if that is the issue - YANBU I think....

LoopyLoopsBettyBoops · 05/05/2011 17:53

YANBU. I too am a candidate, and wasn't going to be able to attend the count because of lack of childcare. (My mum has arrived so now I can). No longer breastfeeding, but still under 2.

Knowing some of the opposition's candidates, I can't see how the behaviour of a baby or toddler can affect things any more than some of the adults.

Where is your count being held, and is it tonight or tomorrow? Ours is tomorrow, at a hotel. Could you consider taking DC with someone else, and asking to be called in when your ward is being counted? Are you running for a party? Are there others you know going who could do this? How big is your area? I'm sure the baby could go a couple of hours at least if the worst came to the worst.

NormanTebbit · 05/05/2011 17:53

Bollocks. Take him.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 05/05/2011 17:54

I don't think it's anything to do with BF'ing; it's probably the risk of your baby screaming. I think you're being unreasonable in trying to make this a BF'ing issue when it probably isn't. Hmm

If you understand it's not a place for children, why is it such a big thing for you? Can someone not look after the baby whilst you attend the count if it's only for an hour or two, feed him before you go? It's a small election, no? Confused

BooBooGlass · 05/05/2011 17:54

I do sympathise, but if you are elected how are you going to manage if you can't leave him?

unclefester77 · 05/05/2011 17:54

I hope you do get this sorted OP - it seems farcical that they are telling you this....

wotnochocs · 05/05/2011 17:54

No there are some places you can't take children -like work! I would imagine if he starts crying he could distract the counters -the buzz of general convesation is much different to a screaming baby.

Flisspaps · 05/05/2011 17:55

The Electoral Services Manager is an arse.

Go, take the baby and create a bit of a scene if anything is said. There's usually local media at these events, I bet no-one says a word to you - it wouldn't look good for them in the paper would it...'Council ban breastfeeding Candidate from Count'

Wink
StewieGriffinsMom · 05/05/2011 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NormanTebbit · 05/05/2011 17:56

I've been to loads of counts. It's a noisy place. There's nothing for a baby to disrupt. You baby will sleep there in a pram as well as anywhere else. And you can feed if needed. If someone is with you, they can take him out of he is unsettled.

Go

SeenButNotHeard · 05/05/2011 17:58

Go.... and have a local journalist at your side Wink

Humphreythehamster · 05/05/2011 18:01

I (and my parents) have been involved in local politics for years, I've seen toddlers at counts when the candidate had no childcare. A BF baby is completely acceptable, the returning officer (or whomever) is talking out of their arse. Can I suggest a sling as you will want your arms free? Good luck!

ilovemydogandMrObama · 05/05/2011 18:02

I'd just go. But also mention it to your agent, and political party who presumably would be able to contact the Chief Exec of the Council and over rule.

BitOfFun · 05/05/2011 18:03

What time is the count? The ones I've been to have been through the night- I wouldn't fancy taking a baby out of its bed for that.

Original poster
weirdbird · 05/05/2011 18:05

If he started crying I would take him out, it is being held in a leisure centre so there is plently of places I could go with him.

Only candiadates and there agents can be at the count.

I have arranged childcare for the older children but he is feeding every few hours.

They are unsure at what time my ward will be counted so I would have to be there, the whole thing starts at 9am and will go on most of the day.

If I am elected then the meetings are in the evening, my husband is home from work and I will feed him before he goes to bed for the night around 7pm and then go to the meeting for 8.

The email from the manager just says that they don't think it would be appropriate.

OP posts:
PfftTheMagicDragon · 05/05/2011 18:06

Lying - she isn't saying that she isn't allowed to take him because she is breastfeeding, so the Hmm is hardly necessary.

She is using the BF to explain why she cannot leave him at home.

Shakirasma · 05/05/2011 18:07

If you are unable to leave your bevy due to bfing, if elected how will you attend meetings as they can go on for hours and certainly are not suitable for children?

Not having a dig btw, just cusrious.

Shakirasma · 05/05/2011 18:08

Grrr bady and curious. Stupid ipad

KaraStarbuckThrace · 05/05/2011 18:08

It's not Radcliffe East by any chance? My BIL is also a candidate and he would defend you at against all comers as if he didn't SIL would have very strong words with him Grin

I wouldn't have even asked permission, I would have just turned up!

raindroprhyme · 05/05/2011 18:10

put him in a sling they won't notice.
i was refused entry to a college calssroom with DS when he was a baby as no children were allowed in classsrooms. He was a lseep in his buggy. i went back to the car took him out of the buggy and popped him in the sling. The lecturer had no clue.

aliceliddell · 05/05/2011 18:14

YANBU. Of course you should take the baby. Is there the faintest possibility that these absurd attitudes have any relevance to the underrepresentation of women in politics?

Original poster
weirdbird · 05/05/2011 18:16

Shakirasma - Also he is only going to be feeding this much for a very very short period more, he is increasing his solids intake finally after really not being interested at all. In another month it will be a differenty story.

OP posts:
FabbyChic · 05/05/2011 18:18

I really dont think this is a matter of breast feeding but more to do with your son being 7 months old.

It really is no place for a baby, but you have to do what you have to do, in the meantime why not start to try to get him to take a bottle even if only with breastmilk in.

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