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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not understand why people choose to live in the countryside?

176 replies

cumbria81 · 03/05/2011 14:11

Don't get me wrong, I love the countryside as much as the next person. I spend most of my weekends there walking/cycling/whatever.

But why on earth would you want to live in the back end of nowhere where you have to get in the car to buy a pint of milk and everything is a logistical nightmare?

Where I live, 2 miles from a city centre, I can walk to work/a swimming pool/cinema/shops/theatre/train station etc etc. I can also, if I want, run/walk off road through parks and woods for a few miles and am out of the city and into rural land - so best of both.

I don't mind sitting in the car for 1.5 hours on the weekend to get out to the real countryside (ie Dales and Lakes) but if I had to drive every single day for everything I think I'd go spare.

OP posts:
IslaValargeone · 03/05/2011 14:50

I live in the country and don't really enjoy it.
I find it frustrating to have to get in the car for just about everything.
I hang out my washing in the 'fresh country air' to find it stinks of pooh because there has been muck spreading that day.
We are hoping to move before the end of the year, to a large town. I am moist with excitement. (Well not quite, but I am looking forward to it)

HerRoyalNotness · 03/05/2011 14:50

Space
I want to turn up the music LOUD and not bother anyone
Not bothered by the neighbours if they turn their music up loud
Loads of animals
The boys' running wild, covered in mud everyday, enjoying fresh air

GeorgeT · 03/05/2011 14:50

I love the countryside, on our walk to school I love to hear the birds and see the flower and trees. That said I would hate to have ge in my ccar everytime I need something. I can walk to school, preschool , our clubs and our library. I am very lucky to be near the countryside but do appreciate all our very local amenities. Spoilt I guess Blush

CurrySpice · 03/05/2011 14:52

I would hate to live in the country Shock

TrinityRhino · 03/05/2011 14:52

I would hate to live in a town let alone a city

all bumnched up next to each other

you can hear everyone doing everything aorunf you all the time

I would much rather be able to be 'on my own' unless I choose to go see my neighbours

huge garden, sea 60 foot from my window

'my' sheep just out the back garden

I can hear birds, not cars all the time

its smells. Yeah I have to jump in the car and drive for 5 mins to get to a town with a tesco but hey

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 03/05/2011 14:52

Yes. We have the best of both worlds where we are now. It's great. We have lived in a tiny village with no services at all and if you didn't have a car you were screwed Grin and they were very welcoming too.

Funnily enough, the place we have lived where we felt least welcome was hemel hempstead. Eventually made some very good friends that I love loads, but apart from them - very unfriendly place. we were there over 7 years I think it was, and couldn't even get the folks running the local shop to say hello without dragging it out of them.

Give me a village any day! Grin

Ormirian · 03/05/2011 14:52

I agree re the logisitics. I suspect I would feel the same way as you if I did finally move to the back end of nowhere, which is my ultimate dream. So I am quite glad it's unlikely to happen Grin.

My parents have never lived anywhere else so the inconvenience of it doesn't strike them.

HecateQueenOfTheNight · 03/05/2011 14:53

oh, and the very rural village - our house backed on to a field. farmer used to keep cows in it. quite often we'd hear a loud bellow and go into the kitchen and a cow had her head through our window again Grin (open window, not broken the glass!) I loved it.

Ragwort · 03/05/2011 14:54

nickelbabe - I wasn't talking personally about whether or not I was made welcome in village life - I was made incredibly welcome (perhaps because I am white, middle class & the typical 'do gooder' type Grin) but it was listening to people's attitudes and just seeing the lack of welcome and general 'offishness' to those who didn't fit the 'stereotype'.

GooseyLoosey · 03/05/2011 14:54

I could not live in the middle of nowhere, but do live in a rural village. I can be at the shops/swimming etc in 20 mins. There are 2 great local pubs. The best thing is that I know my neighbours and and many people who live in the village. It is a great community and I have never found anything to come close to it in a town or city.

HerRoyalNotness · 03/05/2011 14:54

sounds lovely trinity

Pagwatch · 03/05/2011 14:59

I grew up in a village but now I live right in the centre of a big town.

I loved both. Both have downsides and advantages.

I am Grin at the idea of being in town meaning no space though.....

I think dh would like to move further out soon but never having to drive, being 5 minutes walk from cinema, theatre, loads of restaurants, swimming pool, leisure centre, every shop I could ever want... Not so bad

HRHPrincessZombiePlan · 03/05/2011 15:06

YAtotallyNBU. I grew up in the country and it was fucking miserable. Nothing to do and nowhere to go, unless you could cadge a lift (or catch the hourly bus, which often failed to show up). Was miles from any of my friends. Only public places were the church, post office and three pubs. Have vowed that my DC will never endure such a sod awful existence. Think a lot of parents have this idealised Enid Blyton-esque idea of life in the country, when it really isin't like that at all...

As an adult, I wouldn't move back for anything. I like having stuff to do and places to go that are right on my doorstep. I like being in a buzzy envoronment with lots of people around. I like the sociable anonymity of being in a crowd, I like not knowing my neighbours, being able to go for a walk and not have to stop and chat to every other person you meet. I have literally no idea why all the London estate agents describe places as being "villagey", as though it was a good thing.

Francagoestohollywood · 03/05/2011 15:09

Grin Fennel, I should have said perhaps a small city? I did find it very small, but I think my perception was also warped by the fact that the first yrs felt very lonely there.

GetOrfJamesMiddltonCosHeIsMine · 03/05/2011 15:11

I don't much like the countryside cf. my bastard cotswolds thread.

Actually, that is a lie. I like the real countryside, I grew up in a rural area, but it has got to be wind swept moors and isolation. Not where I currently live, which is crap cities, crummy towns and ersatz chocolate boxey cottage twee countryside.

I wouldn't want to live there though. I would never choose to live anywhere more than a mile from a trainline and surrounded by streetlamps. The bigger and grittier the city the better, cannot wait to move.

Fiddledee · 03/05/2011 15:14

I've moved from the centre of the town and being able to walk everywhere to the countryside (albeit near several towns and on a train line to London).

Ocado deliver my milk. Have bought a big freezer so will not run out of milk. DH works in a town he seems to be able to buy milk and bring it home fairly reliably.

I can park my car at my front door - if you have lived in a terrace in London you know what I mean.

Kids can ride their bikes down the road in complete safety. Journey times are the same everyday.

In London sometimes the same journey can take 15 mins or 45mins - that was really annoying for after school activities.

There is none of that London greyness. I am surrounded by trees.

I actually walk more as its more pleasant to do so, not breathing in traffic fumes.

I like it much more than I thought I would.

Kids spend hours of each day outside. They look healthier and happier. DD has stopped biting her nails.

LadylissielouofShropshire · 03/05/2011 15:25

we are moving from a large town to a small village 7 miles from another large town and I cant wait. AND we cant drive. there is a garage nearby (2 min walk), asda delivers, the village school is excellent, there is also a pub and an indian restaurant. I grew up in the countryside, you just have to be organised with your time and when shopping. and the trade off is having lots of lovely fresh air and no drug dealer on your front garden at 2pm in the school holidays (yes, really)

Ragwort · 03/05/2011 15:28

Lady - don't be so sure about the drug dealer - we had one in our village Grin, he also seduced young girls - nice.

COCKadoodledooo · 03/05/2011 15:34

I get claustrophobic in towns. Can't understand why anyone would want to live in one. Glad they do though, because otherwise they'd be clogging up my countryside Grin

nickelbabe · 03/05/2011 15:38

IslaValargeone - never smelled the muck-spreading where I used to live.
now i'm in the town, it's stifling on those days.
(my old place was at the top of a hill, so that might be why)

talking of hills - above the weather! Grin (not really)

but snow is much deeper and lasts much longer.
I love snow - it's my favourite weather.

SummerRain · 03/05/2011 15:48

We moved from the city as we simply couldn't afford to live there anymore but since we've been in the country it's been so much better.

My children can play out without having to be followed around to ensure they're safe

When I open my windows I smell fresh air, flowers and hear birds instead of smelling car fumes and rubbish and hearing people constantly.

we've lived in our village for the same length of time we were in our previous city apartment. Here everyone knows me, I have people I can call on in an emergency, people make an effort to be friendly and inclusive. In our old home no-one knew us, people were unfriendly and rude.

In our old apartment it took 30 mins to drive to the closest shopping centre (less than a mile away) due to traffic, here our closest town is 5 miles away and there's a supermarket there and if i drive 45 mins in any direction there are big towns with Tescos, etc.

In the city there weren't enough school places to take the numbers of kids who needed them, dd would have ended up in a school across the city in classes of 30+. Here they go to the village school across the road with between 6-12 children per class.

We have cats, and plan on getting chickens and once the kids are old enough we'll get a dog. There are horses, donkeys and cows in the fields around our house and a badger set across the fields outside our front door. We've had foxes playing in our garden in broad daylight whilst the children kicked a ball around them and pheasants pecking outside the back door. There are flocks of birds, swallows nesting in the neighbouring buildings, bats down the road and rabbits and hares in all the fields.... some are animals my children might never otherwise have seen.

My children play outside from morning til night with no fear of being hit by cars, bullied by older kids or anyone bothering them..... my biggest concern is the dog from down the road who comes to play and is so big I worry he'll knock ds2 over in excitement.

Yes the travelling to shops and amenities is the downside you pay but it's worth it, and you adjust quickly to stocking up when you're near shops and planning trips to swimming and other amenities to also act as shopping trips while you're there.

I've seen the difference between kids who grow up in cities and those in the countryside and I'm more than willing to put up with a bit of driving around when they're teens to avoid the horrors i've seen first hand with city teens.

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls · 03/05/2011 15:58

Where Nickel used to live is the most wonderful place in the world, out in the middle of nowhere and stunning, I now live 5 mins from where she used to live, in the middle of nowhere. When we moved in everyone was so excited and proper pleased about it. I can walk the dog with no lead, the children can run around no noise, no nosey neighbours, clean air, clean washing on the line, the ability to get snowed in and the snow stays white. Community.

I lived in London and didn't know my neighbours, I now know all my neighbours and believe me none of them conform to white middle class, and we have a pub a 2 second walk from the gate. I thought I'd miss London..........I only occasionally miss the ability to get a delivery, actually scratch that I only miss the Curry House that we used to have deliver to us in London.

Also my pre-natal care was fab, I had consistently the same midwife, didn't ever have to wait for hours when going to the hospital etc etc. I see the local doctor out and about.....

Thankfully we all have choice, I choose to get in my car and drive but my only stumbling block is cows or a farmer, or actually darn cyclists who dawdle.

Gooseberrybushes · 03/05/2011 16:00

some people like it

er that's it

Francagoestohollywood · 03/05/2011 16:01

I live in a big city and know my neighbours. I am friendly with the local newsagent, at least 3 different baristi, the greengrocer, 2 different bakers and 2 porters.

I know lots of people in the area where we live.

YusMilady · 03/05/2011 16:02

Gawd, who'd want to be a townie? We do have access to milk in the countryside, you know. Where do you think it comes from?

Rural seclusion for me - the deeper, the better. I saw a kingfisher by the stream in my garden last week. So I can't walk to a cinema. So what?