Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DM and SF to share a bath in my house?

78 replies

CharliesAngela · 25/04/2011 13:12

My mum and my step father were visiting over the weekend, but staying elsewhere. One evening there was just me at home. Mum asks if I mind if they have a bath, as the place they are staying only has showers. I say no of course, and direct step father upstairs, as mum is kindly washing up for me. I go outside to get the washing in and they've both vanished when I come back in. I take the washing upstairs to put it away to hear talking coming from the bathroom, and basically they've gone off to have a bath together.

They've been married about 6 years, so he's definitely not a father to me. I was totally freaked out and quite cross that they did this in my house with me alone there (we actually have 2 baths in separate rooms so they could have had one each!).

Go on, do your worst, AIBU to find this all really icky?

For the record, I did not say anything at all about it, I went downstairs and watched TV with the door shut.

OP posts:
rainbowinthesky · 25/04/2011 13:13

Yabu. Surely you are all adults.

cheesesarnie · 25/04/2011 13:13

yabu-i dont get the problem.

NinkyNonker · 25/04/2011 13:13

Not sure what the fuss is to be honest.

worraliberty · 25/04/2011 13:14

YABU my DH comes into the bathroom to wash my back all the time and vice versa. Mostly one of us sits on the edge of the bath and we chat.

Original poster
CharliesAngela · 25/04/2011 13:14

Just out of interest, do you all have parents who have remarried in their 60s?

OP posts:
Prunnhilda · 25/04/2011 13:14

I think your reaction was the right one.
Were you bothered about them being physically close, or the hygiene aspect of sharing water, or what?
I tend to think it's their business (unless they had somehow chosen to bathe together in front of you).

Prunnhilda · 25/04/2011 13:15

When I say 'your reaction', I mean to leave them to it and not say anything.
The icky feeling is your business!

TheVisitor · 25/04/2011 13:15

YABU. They weren't necessarily having a good ol' shag whilst they were in there. Grin

valiumredhead · 25/04/2011 13:15

What exactly bothers you about the situation?

They were chatting not having full blown bath sex!............... or were they? Grin

usualsuspect · 25/04/2011 13:15

YABU

Unless you could hear them shagging in the bath, with the door open

BingRugmole · 25/04/2011 13:15

You are being unreasonable. They are grown adults, having a bath. I hate to tell you this, but if they've been married 6 years, they've probably seen each other's genitals, and may even have had sex. Shocking.

Original poster
CharliesAngela · 25/04/2011 13:16

Prunhilda, I find the idea of them being intimate v v difficult. I don't want it in my face.

OP posts:
rainbowinthesky · 25/04/2011 13:16

How is whether we have parents who have remarried in their 60s relevant? Do you think people of this age shouldnt be having a bath together? That's your issue not theirs.

cheesesarnie · 25/04/2011 13:16

mine arent in their sixties but both remarried.
would it be different if the sf was your dad?

are you worried about the bath or do you think they had sex?

i really dont get it!

TheVisitor · 25/04/2011 13:16

Oh, and my mum remarried last year at the age of 68 and my new stepdaddy was 69.

Bluemoonrising · 25/04/2011 13:17

You should be delighted, they are saving water and so saving you electricity costs.

Are they sharing a bed while they are staying with you?

I think your reaction is certainly unreasonable, but you coped with it well in saying nothing and staying away.

rainbowinthesky · 25/04/2011 13:17

But it wasnt in your face. Perhaps they figured that having been together for 6 years you would have realised they have seen each other naked - or did you think they hadnt??

Original poster
CharliesAngela · 25/04/2011 13:17

It's OK Bing, I know they've had sex. My mum made sure I knew they'd done that on their first date.

OP posts:
TheVisitor · 25/04/2011 13:18

Charlies, I get the feeling that you resent your mother having remarried a little. Them being in the bathroom at the same time is not throwing their intimacy in your face.

I have to say though, if they are having a good sex life in their 60s, then bloody good on them! I hope I still am. Let them be.

Bluemoonrising · 25/04/2011 13:18

Oh sorry,l they weren't staying with you, just saw that.

rainbowinthesky · 25/04/2011 13:19

Perhaps, after 6 years, you need to be a little more adult about it.

Original poster
CharliesAngela · 25/04/2011 13:19

OK, IABU. Good to know MN can be unanimous Grin

OP posts:
Prunnhilda · 25/04/2011 13:19

But it wasn't in your face, it was a bath (a practical thing) behind closed doors.
My mum says inappropriate things about sex as well and it's horrid, but meh, she's only showing herself up.

SwearyMary · 25/04/2011 13:21

I think the issue here lies in the fact that your Mother has remarried and that she is still having sex and enjoying it.
Good for her, I say.
My PIL's always share the bathroom, I don't see it as an issue in fact the opposite. I like the fact that after 50yrs of marriage they still enjoy each other.

Based on my thoughts, YABU.

SwearyMary · 25/04/2011 13:22

Oh and I don't think they had sex in your bath! I firmly believe they just bathed and chatted! Smile

Swipe left for the next trending thread