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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have wanted some tea with cow's milk in it..

114 replies

Olifin · 20/04/2011 23:08

...at a lovely seaside park in Hove. Very, very popular and busy playpark right next to the beach which attracts all sorts of families.

The cafe in the park is a vegan, organic place. Apparently it belongs to Heather Mills but I don't know if that is true.

Anyway...non-dairy ice-cream for the kids (don't know what they make it with but it's faaaaar too sweet) and tea for me with soya milk. I don't really want soya milk in my tea but there's no alternative, being as it's a vegan cafe.

I'm all for making provision for people with allergies and ethics and so on but....AIBU to find a vegan cafe in such a very popular location a tad...restrictive? Or bossy?

OP posts:
HeadfirstForHalos · 20/04/2011 23:24

Yeah, a hotdog in your handbag would be a step too far-what about some babybels? Grin

EricNorthmansMistress · 20/04/2011 23:25

There's a rough as pub at the lagoon who would have done you a cup of tea, or you could have waited til kids were done playing and walk down to babylon lounge and sit outside on the beach side. It's very nice there and they do beer :)

Original poster
Olifin · 20/04/2011 23:28

Ooooh....Babylon Lounge! And yes, I know the rough-as pub too. That would be the answer in future. Although I think I will stick to Hove Park where there is a very nice cafe which, as I recall, does a cuppa with cow's milk.

I live in a far shadier town along the coast where a vegan cafe would probably be laughed out of town, sadly.

OP posts:
Vallhala · 20/04/2011 23:37

I have the opposite problem. Although I live near-ish to a trendy city you try getting soya milk in most of their eateries. Anyone would think that you were asking for cyanide, not soya!

This is Not A Good Thing for tea-addicted vegans.

In response to you question YABU to eant cows milk, no matter where you are eating.

Vallhala · 20/04/2011 23:37

WANT! To WANT cows milk, not to eant cows milk!

spotofcheerfulness · 20/04/2011 23:39

i hate that place, can't believe it's actually making money. the food is truly terrible, to all those who say go somewhere else there isn't anywhere else near and it's a great park for littlies.

EricNorthmansMistress · 20/04/2011 23:41

Olifin - east or west? I migrated out westwards a few months ago. Not many vegan establishments in my little town either :)

Original poster
Olifin · 20/04/2011 23:46

I'm west too Eric! :) Outside of B'ton bus route but still with a BN postcode. Funny old town; lovely seafront.

Glad it's not just me spotof

Vallhala I truly don't think you can say people are unreasonable to want cow's milk. Freedom of choice and wot-not.

OP posts:
ChippingInLovesEasterEggs · 20/04/2011 23:52

Olifin - people are unreasonable to want cows milk in a vegan cafe.

Why didn't you have a smoothie or fruit juice instead? I agree that soya milk in tea is vile (sorry Val, but it is!!) - that's why I have my tea weak & black!

I think a trip to Hove is now on the cards though - so thanks for that!! Grin

PS: if the food is vile, it's because it's badly prepared/cooked not because it's vegan, vegan food is (mostly) LUSH!!

CakeandRoses · 20/04/2011 23:53

yabu. do you really think that vegan cafes should only be allowed to open if there's a non-vegan alternative nearby?

i've been there a few times and it's always been v busy so it must be pleasing some people. Prior to HM opening VBites it was a grottyish chips n sausages kinda place so seems an improvement now.

Original poster
Olifin · 20/04/2011 23:57

Unreasonable to want cow's milk in a vegan cafe- yes, definitely.

But perhaps not unreasonable to wish there was an alternative cafe nearby for those who aren't vegans (ie a large proportion of the population).

Or perhaps a general cafe where food for all types is available: vegetarians, -mekons vegans and indeed, the terrible people who consume animal products.

Glad I have recruited another visitor for Hove though!

OP posts:
Original poster
Olifin · 21/04/2011 00:01

Ooooh, I liked it when it was the 'Big Fish' or whatever it was called. I quite like greasy sausages though, so to speak.

I think it's always busy because the park is busy and there's nowhere else for people to buy drinks and snacks.

Of course, people can open vegan cafes wherever they like. I just wish there was an alternative. Is it unreasonable for a vegan to wish there was an alternative to meaty/dairy establishments? No, of course not. Not unreasonable the other way around either.

OP posts:
GloriaSmut · 21/04/2011 00:04

I was at an event in Brighton where Heather Mills had "kindly" donated the cup cakes in order promote this particular vegan restaurant of hers. This nakedly obvious publicity stunt rather backfired since the cakes were utterly vile. So vile that children were shying away in horror from the offer of seconds and thirds of the beastly things. They were pretty inedible even to the totally unfussy too since I took one home and gave it to the dog who carried it out into the garden, toyed with it briefly and then pissed on it.

Much as I agree Olifin, that it's a bonkers place to have a vegan cafe given the lack of any other refreshment outlets nearby, I'm afraid that YAB rather U to expect a vegan cafe to serve cows milk.

OrangeBernard · 21/04/2011 00:07

Yanbu, even uht milk in tea tastes rank, though maybe you have given the tea a miss altogether?

CakeandRoses · 21/04/2011 00:16

i guess you're not being unreasonable to wish there was a non-vegan place nearby but i think you're being a bit unreasonable to say it's a bonkers place to have a vegan cafe.

also, i never quite get the horror shown towards vegan cakes and the like. I had some cake when I was there last (not a cupcake tho) and it was pretty good.

A friend's dh (a baking dh - my idea of heaven) regularly bakes AMAZING varieties of vegan cupcakes for people's birthdays and they get wolfed down and are raved about long after the event (they really are that good).

Maybe HM needs a baking DH.

GloriaSmut · 21/04/2011 00:18

I've eaten lovely vegan cakes and certainly would never "recoil in horror" from any vegan food. But I do recoil in horror from fucking hideous food and trust me, this was it!

Supermoo · 21/04/2011 00:27

You could buy a flask. Make yourself some tea and sit in the sun to drink it while smirking at the ill-prepared folk forced to drink soya.

wook · 21/04/2011 00:29

Get a flask!
If you want something to moan about on the Sussex seafront, try dodging the dogshit at Goring gap!

wook · 21/04/2011 00:30

xposts with supermoo.
Flasks are the way forward.

UnseenAcademicalMum · 21/04/2011 00:34

YABU, it's a vegan cafe. Go to the plentiful non-vegan cafes to have your tea with cows milk.

Personally, having a ds who is allergic to dairy to the point that he reacts to dairy other people are eating in the same room, I'd love to have somewhere I could take him where he could eat ice-cream safely and I could drink tea. As it is, we can not visit cafes, restaurants, pubs, in fact anywhere where food is being served (aside from home).

FetchezLaVache · 21/04/2011 06:45

YABVVVVU to have raised my hopes of a thread about someone going round to their friend's house and being given tea with EBM in it!!

nomoreheels · 21/04/2011 07:21

I quite like soy milk in tea, but you have to drizzle it in slowly, stirring vigorously so as not to get the dreaded curdled bits. I'm not vegan but I avoid milk as it makes me congested.

I make soya cappuccinos at home and have made them for friends when we didn't have any milk in - once the soya milk is steamed, it's lovely and creamy and they thought it tasted fine.

I have an absolutely delicious vegan chocolate cake recipe that I bake regularly, but because it's made with store cupboard basics, not because it's vegan. It turns out perfectly moist every time:

www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Easiest-Chocolate-Cake-354010

Unfortunately a lot of vegan cakes I've tasted are more like bricks, e.g. rock hard flapjacks and muffins. And there can definitely be a holier than thou attitude at some vegan/veggie cafes and shops, I'll give you that. Still, I just get what I like out of it and laugh at any silly uptight ways in private.

littlesez · 21/04/2011 07:44

YABU but i understand why YABU. I am the other way round I get frustrated when i have no other option that cows milk and end up having black tea or coffee.

Some vegan ice cream is nice some isnt but thats the same of any food, same with cakes.

maybe take a flask?

I take rice milk out with me sometimes and ask before i use it in cafe's but thats not offensive taking cows milk into a vegan cafe would be.

Original poster
Olifin · 21/04/2011 07:46

GloriaSmut...your dog anecdote did make me larf.

wook! You're in my neck of the woods. I was at Goring Gap the weekend before last and we luckily didn't encounter any dog shit. However, there is an unacceptable amount of dog shit in Worthing generally. That isn't a metaphor though it could easily be one.

OP posts:
EricNorthmansMistress · 21/04/2011 10:07

You're in Worthing? Me Sompting :)

Sorry, I've made vegan cakes, I used to be lacto free for several years and I've had plenty of lovely vegan cakes. V Bites' cake is absolutely vile. You can taste the vegetable oil they use instead of butter, whatever the egg substitute is doesn't work, it's heavy, cloying, sticky and tasteless. Ick. And over three bloody quid a slice! I don't think so....

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